


Corals

by Galini8Dark



Series: Stones [1]
Category: Glass (2019), Split (2016)
Genre: Age Difference, Dissociative Identity Disorder, Eventual Relationships, Eventual Romance, Eventual Smut, F/M, Gen, Implied Childhood Sexual Abuse, Kidnapping, Multiple Personalities, Mutant Powers, Past Abuse, Past Rape/Non-con, Possessive Behavior, Supernatural Elements, Violence
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-29
Updated: 2021-02-16
Packaged: 2021-03-01 04:40:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 14
Words: 61,397
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23359399
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Galini8Dark/pseuds/Galini8Dark
Summary: «Perseus, with a swing of his sharp sword, cut the head of the Gorgon Medousa, who turned to stone those who would look at her eyes. The head went rolling to the sea and from its blood became stone the underwater plants. And that's how corals came to be.»We were the same. We were both created due to spilled blood and we both turned to stone afterwards. Still alive underneath. Still growing.A/N: Slow updates. I haven't forgotten.
Relationships: Barry (Split)/Original Female Character(s), Dennis (Split)/Original Female Character(s), Hedwig (Split)/Original Female Character(s), Jade (Split)/Original Female Character(s), Kevin Wendell Crumb/Original Female Character(s), Patricia (Split)/Original Female Character(s), The Beast (Split)/Original Female Character(s)
Series: Stones [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1680130
Comments: 6
Kudos: 41





	1. OC's (Artbreeder)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah... This is how I spent my time instead of writing new chapters...

  
Coraline Clacher  
  
  
Caroline (Elizabeth)  
  
  
Carlos (Matthew)

  
Carlotta (Mary)

  
Coran (Noah)  
  
  
Carley (Emma, "Emmett")


	2. Chapter 2

**Coraline**  
People scared me.

I was not scared of crowds. Quite the opposite, I felt safe in a big group of people who didn't know who I was. Walking in the most crowed street, watching and observing people and their behaviours was pretty much my favorite activity. I found it conforting to have people near me, it felt safer, like no one could attack me in a place with many witnesses. But somehow I had grown to realize, people were capable of horrible things. Within a small amount of time I also came to realize, what terrible things I could do, too.

No one likes to be forced to do things. I don’t really mind anymore, one gets used to ignoring their personal feelings after a while. But I still had to recognize my own discomfort on attending that party. Espesially when it was the party of a person I barely spoke with, but I was still urged to go to anyway. But my opinion obviously didn't matter, the choice was my own. The only choice I would ever make considering Sofia’s disapproval if I refused. Her reaction when disappointed, sort of reminded me of my mother’s sad face when we had to leave the barn after a full week of solitude.

So that morning, I found myself looking at the mirror, my lean figure dressed in faded jeans, and a brown sweater. Hair in a fishbone braid stretched and tight like my mother used to make it, and my talisman hanging around my neck.

I actually looked pretty. I hadn't realised it but I had grown up and I no longer looked like a little girl. It still surprised me sometimes, the girl in the mirror looked like a woman and I still felt like a 12 year old. Perhaps I was more Carlotta than myself at that point. I had even let her do the make up. Winged eyeliner and blushed cheeks. I thought it wasn’t a morning look but everyone told me otherwise. Carlotta even suggested putting lipstick on, saying my lip gloss didn’t have any color.

The knock on the door caused me to come out of my thoughts and eye the door, Sofia asking if she could enter. I told her to come in, well aware my voice was barely audible, yet somehow she heard me and the handle of the door turned, as she entered. She wasn't dressed casually like I was, her tight pencil skirt and white ironed shirt surely had nothing to do with her niece's party. Which meant she wouldn't come with me, which made it even worse for me.

«Did you developed good sense of fahion overnight?.» She questioned jokingly. Hand on her hip, head cocking on the side, a smirk on her face. She was pleased with me, taking care of my appearence. And that made me glad. I really didn't like disappointing her. Not when she had done so many things for me. For all of us.

«I had help. It was team work of three.» I responded softly, earning an amused chuckle from Caroline, who was sitting a few seats back, hands crossed on her lap, seemingly looking out of the window, even though her ears were clearly on us. Sofia's face twitched a little, at me mentioning my guardian but she shook it away almost immediatly. She wasn't quite comfortable with Caroline. Their strong and indipendent characters used to be the reason for most of the arguments in the house.

«I like it. I love it actually.» She said, nodding with approval. "Well, even if she didn't, I like it. And I am not letting you change again." Carlotta commented behind me. Sofia nodded towards the door, making her way out. I grabbed my shoes, bag, and coat and followed her quietly, somehow glad she hadn't noticed the book I shoved in my backpack, in case I got bored.

{...}

As expected, the book was more than useful. The party was nothing special, nothing worth remembering or even bothering to describe. The Birthday Girl, tried to make us all feel welcome, but didn't quite succeded. So I took my book and cake piece and headed to the further corner. Away from the mass and the unwanted attention and people. I wasn’t antisocial, it was just that Caroline had much more intresting things to discuss.

Later another girl -her name remained unknown since I hadn’t bother hearing any of the names of the people today- joined my silence. She sat quietly, and looked elsewhere ignoring the girls who took photos behind us. Caroline urged me to go and talk to the girl, but Carlotta noted how she obviously wanted to be left alone. They argued for a while and then dropped the matter.

And so the party went. And soon I found myself with Sofia's little brother, his daughter and best friend, waiting for the same girl I had rudely ignored through the whole party. At some point her name, Casey, was mentioned. She had taken out her selfphone and spoke through it, far away from us. I watched her as she shifted her weight from one leg to the other, glancing over us once in a while.

"She is nervous." Carol read her, steading behind to me, watching her with me. "She is not even talking to the phone, is she?"

«That's what happens when you do a mercy invite...» Claire muttered as she walked up to her father who turned at her confused, not sure what his precious daughter meant. Carlotta stood frozen next to me, her anger vibrating from her. It really took nothing to get her angry, her brother once said she craved violence since she learned to walk and that her first words were curses.

«I believed you wanted to invite everyone.»

«Dad, I can't invite everyone in my art class except for one person without social networking inflicting more pain on that person and I am not a monster.» She said in one breath, making a point, about her arrogant kindness. Carlos started laughing hysterically far behind me. I had to bite back a smile, not to start laughing. Not so much because of her comment, but because Carlos' laughter sometimes was like hearing a chicken choking.

"It helps her sleep at night." Carlotta noted when I voiced my thoughts to them, causing Carlos to shut up. "Those cunts have the delusion that they are saints."

“Don’t we all?” I opposed.

«I am proud of you.» He said, probably not having even understood half of her words and then added a quick; «I think.» This time I had to cough to stop my laughs. Even Carol was smiling at the comicotragical conversation now. And she usually didn't laugh at this kind of situations. Social statues, unfairness and family issues were quite the triggers for long and deep conversations with her. Being the first of my human alters, she had influenced my opinions more than anyone on the Bus. Or at least, I think so.

«She gets detention a lot. And she yells at teachers sometimes.» Claire told her father, gaining my attention. I hushed the Passengers and I focused on her words and the girl on the further corner. «There was that rumor that went around that she just kept running away from home.» My stomach sank. Carlotta cursed quietly, catching on, on what this probably meant.

«Um, maybe she can Uber.» Marcia proposed, uncomfortably moving and I knew Carlotta wanted to hit her that very moment. I could see her face through the rearview mirror, her calm facade flickering. A quiet impatient tacking filled the bus, Carlotta's foot moving up and down.

«I seriously believe that we can go home now.» Claire nodded in agreement, a hint of desperation in he voice, and I got the temptation to pass the wheel to Carlotta or Caroline, and watch the amazing conversation/fight unfold. But as I looked up I saw the look Carlos was giving me, obviously knowing what was running through my mind, and I decided to keep driving for a little while longer.

«Um, did I mistakenly convey this was a democracy?» Claire's father interapted them. «We are not going until she gets picked up.» He put emphases on the last words. The girls sighed excausted, the same moment the girl made her way towards us and gave them a small forced smile.

«Uh, the car broke down.» She said, letting the smile drop, still keeping a kind expression on, just so she won't be rude. "Or cause suspissions." Carlos muttered from his seat, reading my thoughts once again, his gaze to his selfphone and whatever game he was playing. «I'm just gonna take the bus.»

«You're not taking a bus. I'll drive you home.» The father said and his daughter looked at her feet, slightly tired of the whole ordeal. «Claire has almost saved half of the money she needs for a car. Isn't that right?» He turned to the blonde girl, who only made a grimanse biting her lip to keep her mouth shut. «This will be one of the few times left I can drive you guys around. Huh?»

"His good in making up excuses, ain’t he?" Carlotta sighed sarcastically and I nodded at her. "Thank God him and Sofia are nothing alike." I couldn't help but smile at how right she was. Of course, Sofia’s years in court had trained her in excuses. A paniced expression took over Casey’s face and before she could find the right words to dicline the forced offer Claire opened her mouth.

«You won't be able to hear my dad tell jokes that only he thinks are funny for an entire ride unless you come.» Her father did his best not to get offended but failed miserably. "Dear Lord" Carlos facepalmed. "Did she really just said that?" «You really don't want to miss that.» She added. "Sofia has no relations with those idiots. End of story." Carlotta announsed and I silently agreed.

{...}

It was cold. Sunny but cold. Colder than usual. Claire and Marcia seemed to have little care of the cold, wearing the cloths they were wearing. At this point I was really glad for the extra shirts I had decided to wear under my sweater. It was nothing much, but it still provided warmth that I was longing for.

I let the others enter the car first, doing my best to ignore Marcia's and Claire's giggles and hysteric laughs, that Carlos couldn't help but point, were worst than his. Helping with the bags a little bit. After reassuring me he got it, Sofia's brother told me to get inside and so I did, but as I opened the door I heard him speak.

«Can I help you?» He asked someone and I turned to look, door half open, one leg inside the other outside. The man who had approached us was tall. Two heads taller than me at least. Carlotta whisled when my eyes wandered over the incredably muscly body. Dressed in ironed grey shirt and perfectly straight jeans. I let Carol make a quick profile of his posture as he awkardly stopped and looked at us. His gaze moved from Claire's father to me, as if he wanted to speak to the man alone. My mind couldn't fandom what for.

Taking the message, her father turned to me with a kind smile.

«It's alright Coraline, I'll be there in a minute.» He told me. Looking up to the tall stranger I wondered if I should let one of the others take the Wheel, but desided against it thinking what could each one of them cause in such a situation. Caroline agreed with me, nodding reasurringly through the rearview mirror. "Act normal. A normal person wouldn't worry for something so simple." Was another way to tell me not to be paranoid over it. Without sparing any of them another look I got in the back seat with the Instagram Model Duo. They were laughing hysteracly with some guy on the phone, causing my head to hurt.

As soon the door close, fastened my seatbelt and I relaxed I felt my body falling apart. This party had drained my energy in so many ways. I wanted more than anything to give the wheel to Carol or Carlotta and go to sleep for a few hours, or days, but decided that I should start avoiding giving up after every tiring situation. It made me feel kind of pathetic, like I was taking the easy way. When I first said this out loud there were various reactions from my Passengers.

I closed my eyes and let my head rest against the window, allowing myself a few moments of peace and quiet. I almost didn't even hear the driver's door opening and closing again after the car's weight shifted from the person who stepped in. "Is Claire's dad so heavy that the car would shift it's weight?" Carlos questioned from the back of the Bus but I ignored him. I had just started to fall asleep after all. I hoped I would be awakened only when we reached Sofia's house.

«Pardon me sir. I think you have the wrong car.» I heard Claire say, confusion clear in her voice and I felt Carlos and Carlotta rush to my side, ready to take the Wheel before I could even register what Claire's words meant. I heard a spraying sound and strangled to keep the Wheel for myself, as the twins attempted to force me out of the Driver's seat.

I felt someone, probably Claire, falling on me, and I flinched. I tried breathing in and out, but as panic creeped over me, I decided that one of the twins would handle this better. But before I could do so, I heard the alarm of the car ring. Someone had open a door. And it wasn't me. There were a few tensed moments of silence in both the car and the Bus. Carlos and Carlotta had come in the front, waiting, watching, and hearing through me. “I can’t move” I told them, “Claire is crashing me and I have safety belt on. I am not fast enough.”

“It’s okay, just pretend to be asleep. He won’t hurt you if you don’t fight him.” Carlos told me, ignoring his sister’s complaints and urges to fight him. The spraying sound echoed again and there was a small sound which I guessed was Casey's body. The alarm stopped a few moments later but I still made no moves or sounds, even when the car started moving, I layed unmoving, not even daring to open my eyes. Fighting to accept the fact we had just been kidnapped in broad daylight.

After what seemed to me hours, I opened my eyes, just a bit, to look at our kidnapper. I was not surprised that it was the same man that had approached us earlier. He was driving, phenomanicly calm, taking us farther from the city. I cursed myself for wearing safety belt once again.

«I know you are awake.»I heard him say and my muscles tenced. To match his appearence his voice was deep and strong. It made me shiver in fear. His tone firm, leaving me no space to lie. I opened my eyes and looked at him. My brown eyes met his blue ones, and after a while I remembered what it felt like to feel tiny in front of a man's gaze. He was looking at me through the rear view's mirror but the look he gave me was enought to make me shiver. I knew that look. «You try anything, you are gonna regret it.» He said and I only managed to nod and straigten my body. Not bothering to resist, when Carlos pulled me from the Driver's seat.


	3. Chapter 3

**Carlos**  
We drove outside the city, far from the roads that had cameras, following a route that if you hadn't searched for it, you'd hardly find it. "This was obviously planned." I told myself and Carlotta laughed bitterly next to me. "Well planned." She noted, clenched jaw and butterfly knife flying at her hand. She was pissed and on edge, but I guess we all were a little bit. It had been a while since the last time we had a stressful event, and we had been caught off guard. Like most people would be when being kidnapped I guess.

When the car stopped, we were in the middle of nowhere. The only thing out here, another car. A green Zoo Van. "So we are gonna be his animals? His pets?" Carlotta snored "That is at least offending." She sat on the seat behind me.

"What did you expect? A limo?" Caroline asked her. She didn't bother answering. Coral, who until now had been standing next to us, walked to the Professor's arms and hugged her tightly. They sat silently a few seats further away and did their best to ignore the Road. They could get out and we could pick them up later if they wanted, but apparently Coral didn't want to leave us.

«Hands.» He ordered and I heard Coraline whimpering at Caroline's arms, unpleasant memories surfacing for all of us. "Get her to sleep or get her out." I told the Proffesor and she nodded at me. I turned and allowed the man to tie my hands with rope, during the process I made sure to place my hands in such way that I could easily release myself if needed. It was easy really, Coraline's body was much smaller than the one I usually thought myself to be in. «Get inside» He told me, opening the door of the Zoo Van for me to enter.

«Is there a point in telling you that you don't have to do this?» I asked before entering but as expected he ignored me and pushed me in. "He's a dead motherfucker." My sister told me, watching alongside me as he carried one by one the unconsious girls in the van with me. He moved them like they were feathers. And they were not half as small as Coraline. No doubt, me and my sis had done a handful job muscling her up and martial arts were much like our second nature but we still stood no chance against this guy. We'd only manage to irritate him.

He closed the doors, leaving us in the dark. "I've hidden a blade on each boot. Release yourself and open the doors with it. He shouldn't run too fast when in lights." My sister informed me the same time we heard him lock from outside. I cursed loudly. We had no way out, and no idea where we were going. My sister started proposing ideas for our escape. Her list was endless, as were the ways we’d killed in each idea. My thoughts only paused as my eyes fell at the figures that laid with Coraline in the van. “We have to follow him.” I told them, meeting my sisters venomous gaze. I am sure she could stop me if she wanted but she wouldn't. She could see reason as well as I and our goal was common. To keep Coraline safe. And sane.

"We are out of safe escape options. The authorities will know the moment Sofia's brother is awake." I responded calmly. "Do you honestly thing those idiots stand a chance to survive without us?" I motioned towards the sleeping girls. She looked to the unconsious bodies that moved in every turn the van took and bit her lip understanding what I meant. Unfortunately Coral had a bit of a Savior complex. That's what created the Professor in the first place too. She wanted to help no matter what, and she suffered to do it.

"You better not let her get hurt again." Carlotta growled defeated and I smiled at her.

"She won't." I reasured her. Her eyes looked outside again, expecting something to happen. When she finally decided nothing would change for a while she turned on her heels and walked in the back. Sat next to Coral and the Professor and looked outside the window, to all the memories behind us, and the thoughts around us. The road underneath the Bus full of stones and holes, I was surprised we had travelled so far.

Coral's mind was not exactly the most peaceful place to be.

{...}

He stopped and placed a blindfold over my eyes, and driving became kind of harder. Not because of the lack of sight, more like because of Carlotta's constant swearing about how she'd kill the guy and me for ever convinsing her to stay put. But still I indured and followed obidiently, tracking the turns and steps we took, in case we needed to find our way out and couldn't.

There were stairs, doors, sounds of machines and pipes, echoes of our steps, a funny smell of moist and closure and a lot of corridors and walking. We were underground, but I couldn't tell what sort of facilities would have such a huge underground network. Of course it could be the Zoo. But it would had been too easy.

I was placed in a room, ordered to sit on what could be a bed or a sofa, but the man didn't untie me until several minutes later. First my hands and then my eyes. First thing I saw was blue eyes. The man that kidnapped Coral surely had the most amazing eye color. Then I saw the girls. One next to me, Casey I believe her name was. And the other two on the other bed.The man walked away, and stood further from me, hands folded on his chest, watching, waiting for any reaction.

"Don't let him see fear or anger." Caroline advised melodically, walking up the front of the Bus. "If this is going to be a sexual assault he'll want us to fight him." So I didn't. I stared back a him, expecting some sudden violent move, like the ones Coral's father made. But it never came. Instead he walked up on us, and took out a paper tisue. He placed it gently on my fore head, drying some sweat drops that had begun to form. I still avoided reacting. Pulling away or fighting him.

And then he walked out. Leaving us alone just like that.

As soon as our kidnapper walked I looked at the room. It was secure. The door locked from outside, no windows a bathroom without a door for us to hide in, two beds, no sharp objects, naked walls. It was well designed. He had obviously planned this. "Now what, smart ass?" My sister snapped. She hadn't talked for a while, making me think she had finally fallen asleep. Apparently it was only wishful thinking.

"Now we wait." I said, turning the Bus off. "Coraline will take control as soon as she wakes up, so we won't seem suspisious and upset the girls further." I said, falling back, turning my head towards her as she stood next to me, hands folded on her chest."We will guide her through the way. Ready to take over when nessecary." I assured her, somehow knowing that this would hardly relax her. But there was nothing we could do. Nothing I could think of anyway. We could only wait for now.

She scoffed, mocking me. "She won't be able to take it." She said in a low growl. "She’ll shut down again."

"She is stronger than she used to be." I insisted, not letting her negativity affect me. What a pessimist she was when it came to Coral. Always overprotective, never letting her test her limits in any mental way. "You saw her. She was in shock but went on. She kept the Wheel and pushed us both away while keeping control of herself at the same time."

It was fascinating. I remembered her when she was still a girl, a child. Ready to give up the Wheel for the smallest, meaningless reason. A scared little child even before the incident. She was trully unable to think clearly. But now. She was ready to face dangers. She was able to push her own limits. She had to be. Or that would mean she hadn't yet get over her past. And she probably couldn't get on with her life. Non of us could. I couldn't bear the thought of it. Coraline had to be alright.

"You overestimate her." She said with shaking her head. "She is still healing." I couldn't hear this. I wouldn't. Coral had come so far. We all had. I wouldn't let my sister scare us like that. Not when we had the chance to test our strength like that.

"She is not cripled Carlotta!" I snapped at her. "She has us!" My sister's face morphed from shock to fury, passing every middle stage in miliseconds. She was ready to release anger. But that was nothing unusual about her.

"That doesn't mean-"

"Oh for goodness sake!" Caroline's voice echoed from the back "Stop it the two of you! Even if we managed to escape him, we could easily get her hurt in the process."

"Not to mention that if those girls do get killed she will be in worse state than she was with her father." I said, backing her up. The guilt would wreck her. Coraline had been through one of the worst kinds of trauma, an abduction should be nothing for her. But her own emotions against herself, that would tear her apart and then kneel her.

"Are you comparing rape with guilt Carlos?" Carol asked me calmly, leaving me no choice but to shut my mouth. No excuses would work here. No excuse would work on anything with Caroline. Better show respect to this old woman than anger her. My sister's fury I could manage, but the Professor was not someone I'd mess up with ever again. "Coral will be lucky to leave this place with only guilt weighting upon her...." Her voice impossibly low, but calm and steady, not angry yet, but frustrated the least. “Get it through your thick scull, soldier. This isn’t an exercise for her mental health. We are I danger.”

"We will fight him if tries anything." I assured them, causing Carol to laugh and my sister to roll her eyes at my stupidity.

"Oh come on." Carlotta exclaimed "Did you see the guy?" She pointed towards the Driver's seat in anger. "You keep forgetting brother that you are not in the body which she imagine us to be in. You host a little girl. Sure, she is stronger than other girls her age, both mentally and physically, but she is NOT a Marine Soldier!" I looked down, realising her worries now. She groaned in frustration, walking away, getting off the Bus, to smoke, to run, to stab something, I am not sure.

"That man was thrice her size Carlo. Her father was not even twice her size and not once you managed to keep him off her. What chances do you think we stand against this man?" Caroline asked calmly from the back of a Bus, a look of pity on her face when she looked at me. I clenched my teeth, saying nothing. Letting the Bus fall silent again.

They were right, I'd give them that. We didn't exactly had the odds in our favour. But I would still prove them wrong. We'd survive this. And somehow we'd get stronger out of this.

We had to.

 **Caroline**  
Looking down to the sleeping girl in my arms I recalled our first meeting and smiled to myself.

Coral's mindset was quite unusual. Through my studies I had met a few D.I.D. patients myself, but these cases followed the common rules, ANPs, and Eps, other amnisiac, other ignorant, other careless, or kneeled by the memories. Coral didn't follow those rules. The usual alter of infants or littles, was absent, just like the variety of fragments that were supposed to wander with us in her head. But there were non, just me, Rocky, Carlotta and Carlo, and Coraline.

But non of that was what triggered me the most, but the fact that, me, Carlos and Carlotta had too detailed memories. Memories of our lives, without Coral in it. Me, for example, I had children, and grandchildren. Or at least I remember I have. Because logically I don't. Coral has shapped a life for each one of us. Each Passenger has a past to form their behaviour. That's how rooted her mindset is in her disorder.

Coral shifted awake in my arms. Looking up at me tiredly. She shifted to look behind her, on the Bus. Carlos was seated in front, looking outside, to his sister who stabbed some trees outside, to release her anger as I had advised her to do plenty of times.

«What did I miss?» Coral asked us, her throat sore from the sobs. Carlos responded before I could, not even bothering to avert his eyes from his raging twin. A note of irritation and irony in his voice.

«The usual, an abduction, a fight between me and two women. Which I lost. Women's always right unless you wanna die, right?» His voice was bitter but humorous at the same time. He turned to look at her, a small spark in his eye. I knew what he was doing, he was trying to make Coral laugh, to lighten her mood. I had watched him use the same trick on her plenty of times. For someone who knew what he was doing it had gotten old, but Coral had no idea it was on purpose so she fell for it easily, her mood lightening up, already calmerr from her nap.

«When are you gonna learn?» She chuckled getting up. I moved away, letting her move freely.

«I need another male in here, I can't handle three women of my own.» He complained, making Coral laugh harder. «You can't even handle one.» She mocked him. Stretching her hands. She looked refreshed, braver. She looked ready to face her troubles. Somehow that worried me. Was she faking her emotions to us too? I doubted she could be so calm so fast.

«Where are we?» She asked, walking down to the aisle, climbing to the last seats, to look the road behind us, and get a small idea of what had happened.

«Somewhere underground. The room in which he placed you and the girls is secure. He didn't try anything.» Carlos informed her, knocking the glass for his sister to come back in. I watched as Carlotta stopped and looked into the Bus, to see Coraline awake and understand that we were about to hit the road again. Coraline shifted uncomforatably, closing the back curtains, blocking off the memories.

«Do you think he's going to?» She asked us quietly. slight worry coloring her voice.

«If I notice anything I'll take over.» I reassured her. She always counted on me to read people and guess their behaviour, she had this false idea that being a psychologist meant being a supernatural empath. I didn't bother to explain I was not. Not since she hadn't try to make me read someone thoughts as Carlos read hers and she read Carlos'.

«You want me to leave the Bus don't you?» She turned to him, once again, responding to something unspoken. Carlos looked at her, his face gloomy. He didn't answer her immediatly.

«I want all of you to leave the Bus if something goes wrong.» He finally told her, and I couldn't have been more proud at his decision to ask her this. He'd take the pain, the abuse, and still let Coral guide. He had just asigned her on a mission to keep two of her alters in line and take them away from a possible battlefield. She agreed weakly, shivering at the thought of reliving everything. She didn't protest, she knew it was for the best. «Can I drive for now?» She asked, as if we would try and stop her. We'd never, not when we had tried so hard to get her to drive a little bit more. We wouldn't stop her if she volunteered to take her natural place as the Driver.

«All yours.» He motioned for her to pass him and seat in front. And she did, just as Carlotta stepped in, a surprised look on her face, seeing the little scared girl, driving bravely into the unknown. And as the Bus started, I couldn't help but hope Carlos was right. But I knew better than to think we'd get out of this unscarred.


	4. Chapter 4

**Coraline  
** I awoke the same moment Casey did, I know beacuse I felt her move and sit up on the mattress. Unlike her, I was quick to awake. I shot up, scanning the room, quickly finding that Carlos wasn't kidding about the room being secure. Every detail he mentioned was the same. Even the door was made of metal. Casey on the other hand, rose slowly, glancing around, still not fully awake. It was so silent. I could hear our breaths in the quiet of the room.

I heard a whisper from one of the girls, not sure which, saying they had waken up in here too. My head was turned to the bathroom, and I was staring the yellow flower on the sink, feeling a sort of horror rise in me. It was placed careully on the white surface, almost deferentianly. The same flowers were placed on each pillow. Of all the things in the room, those blooms seemed to freeze my blood with the most efficiency.

"You don't decorate a room of someone meaningless." Carol noted by my side. Leaning over the Wheel to look closer. The yellow flower seemed to have more meaning for us than the entire room. Funny how a fragile bloom could capture the attention of 4 of the 7 people in the room. Or was it 5? Casey seemed as confussed as I from it's presence. "Why yellow?" She asked behind us, but her question was answered with silence. I looked my Passengers unsure if I should go on but non of them offered to take the Wheel. And come to think of it, I don't think I'd had let them. Still I liked Carlotta reacting and swearing more than seeing her silent and puzzled. It had been a while since

"Just keep looking Coral. We might come up with an escape plan." Carlotta said sternly behind me. Pulling Carlos away from the Wheel, letting me drive in peace. I didn't act immediatly, I took a few moments to collect myself and then I took the Wheel, the familiar sound of the machine groaning, was heaven to my ears. A tiny reminder, I was alive, I was safe in my mind, and in control. When all was going down, I had places to hide where even bad men could never found me.

«What the hell is going on? What are we doing here? What happend to my dad?» Claire started asking, one question after the other, and a part of me, felt sorry that couldn't answer her. Somehow the complete lack of anwsers seemed better than having half of them, at the moment. I studied the walls, the beds, the door. Nothing seemed imperfect enough for us to take advantage of.

«He's out there.» Marcia trembled, looking at the steel door horrified, probably noticing the light sounds from the other side of it. I could hear it too. Steps, things being moved, whispers. Was it someone else out there or was it a TV playing?

«Do you know what happend to my dad?» Claire asked, ignoring her friend. Unable to give her an anwser I looked at Casey, who seemed lost and half asleep yet, she shook her head. I avoided looking at her, I felt guilty, even though I had no reason to. I felt like I hid a secret that was very important, even though I knew as much as they did at this point. "She looks so worried." I said, looking at Carol through the rearview mirror.

"You were too, when the police came that day." She responded kindly. 'That was different!' I wanted to tell her. I wanted to have that conversation again. I wanted so badly to defent him for everything. But I knew she was right. And I guess that's what this endless pain was. The truth I couldn't deny.

He was close to the door. I could hear him, see his shadow under the door. Then a light turned on, and the door opened. His eyes skanned us all, making sure we were all here. That we were all quiet and didn’t move. He was carrying a chair which he place in front of the door. I watched curiously as he cleaned the chair with a yellow cloth before sitting. Caroline whispered something next to me, I could barely hear it. I turned to her, she had not come near the Wheel in a long while. She always kept her distance from the control system, staying behind or staying out of the Bus most of her time. And here she was now, leaning closer to the glass, like Carlos had done earlier, looking at the man clean a chair before sitting. "Drive. Don't stop." She said, still not leaving my side.

The man sat and looked at us. Hands folded on his chest. At first I thought he had gotten comfortable to make a conversation say something about our presence here. But as he skanned us I realized he wasn't choosing words. He was choosing between us. His eyes finding mine for a moment. I panicked. Defencively stiffing, covering one hand with another and lowering my head submissively. Being a good girl. Before I could look away his eyes turned to Marcia and Claire, his stare as intence as it was when he looked at me. Only Marcia wasn't used to the intencity, so she moved unconfortably, pulling her skirt down, to hide the skin.

"This idiot!" Carlos cursed beside me, watching the man breath in deeply. Goosebumps run down my spine. This little defensive move of hers was enough to provoke him. She could provoke him with much less but letting her hand wander on exposed skin was one hell of a invite on his mind. I knew that. All of my Passengers did too. So non of us were surprised when he got up and pointed at Marcia. «I choose you first.» He said, getting up and taking the chair out. Marcia looked at us panicked. I could tell she didn't know what for, I almost weeped at the way Claire hugged her friend as if it would protect her. The man hesitated before grapping Marcia's shoulder. «It's only gonna be a minute» He said, before pulling her.

"Carlotta do something!" I cried inside the Bus. She had to do something. She alays was the one to defend girls in such situations, the one to react and snap with anger. But when I turned to her she looked lost and shaken up, like she was deciding between options. Just like every single one of us, she had forgotten how bad things could get. "Carlotta please!" Marcia screamed as the man pulled her away from Claire, kicking on the air, hitting nothing. She managed to release herself and she fell on Casey, who whispered something to her. I was frozen in place. Unable to help or to do something.

"Run." Carlotta told me. And I looked at her confused. "Get out! He'll let her go if you run!" She yelled at me and I obeyed before she had properly finish her sentence, before the man could even turn I had run out and I was running through the rooms like crazy. I opened any door I could find, barely noticing the heavy footsteps following me.

A way out.

I needed to find the door out.

Last room. A living room. A neat living room with old furniture.

The door was locked.

«No. No no no no. Come on!» I screamed and kicked it with as much force I had, my mind running back to how easy it looked when Papa did it to get in the bedroom where Mom had locked herself in. I only managed to hurt my leg and to limp in place while hurting my hands with my fists, as if that would open the door somehow. I was ready to give up the Wheel. Hoping that Carlos or Carlotta would handle that better, with a clearer mind and a good strategy.

«You shouldn't have done that.» I heard his voice behind me. I leaned onto the door, abandoning my attempts to open the door. Holding my breath and tears I waited for him to grab me and drag me away from my only escape route. That was it. Marcia had been saved, he had followed me and left her alone. But now I had to deal with the consequences. When for a while he didn't hit me or dragged me away, I slowly turned around to face him.

«You'd hurt her.» I accused him quietly. He didn't deny it. Instead he looked down at me with the same look he looked at Marcia earlier.

Lust.

I had seen it often before. I had learned to recognise the less than innocent nature behind it. I looked to the floor, feeling sick in my stomach. I let a shaky breath, pulled myself together. I shut my eyes, expecting him to do what he was supposed to do. I waited, for what felt like centuries. In my head, I had pushed the Passengers back, and I was already living it again. And I was already begging for it to end.

«Do you dance?» He asked quietly, the harmless question caughting my off guard. I looked up to him, confusion obvious on my face. I was unsure if he was referring to ballroom, or sexy dances. But I didn't dare ask. One because I knew non of the two, and two because even if I did and wanted to dance for/with him, my leg hurt like hell from the kick I had just given to the door. So I shook my head. He only nodded shortly with understanding. «If you try that again I'll have to separate you from each other.» He warned me surprising me once again. Was he letting this slip? He grabbed my arm, pulling me away from the door. At first I remembered how he had grabbed Marcia, the way he grabbed me was so light compared to the force he had used on her. I was pulled and I tried to follow his pace but my leg gave out and I knelt to the floor, grabbing my throbbing ankle. He turned to me irritated, and I looked at him scared before averting my eyes to the floor again. But nothing came. And his patience seemed to be the scarier thing now. Groaning, he picked me up, so easily and lightly, as if I weighted nothing, shocking me once more.

Through the way back I counted the turns and rooms, noticing everything I could about each one. He placed me to the chair next to the door, pulling out the keys to open it. I was busy skanning the room, my eyes fell on the bike next to the door that led to the corridor. Quite small for a man at his size. Maybe he had a kid. Or a sibling. I wondered if the kid whose bike that was, was ok. Or if this was just a story repeating itself.

The door opened, I heard slight screams from inside. I was pushed inside and the door shut behind me. Leaving me with the three girls who seemed surprised to see me whole and unharmed. I couldn't blame them. I couldn't quite believe it myself. I had gotten off this with only a bruised ankle which was only my fault. He had caused no harm. I only tried to get out of my head that this meant the worst was yet to come. The girls seemed unharmed as well. Scared to the bone but at least they had no injuries.

«Oh my god Cory! Did he hurt you?» Claire asked me between her cries, getting up and running to me, offering to help me walk to the bed. I pushed her away, putting some distance between us.

«The outside door is locked.» I simply said, and made my way to the beds, sitting down next to Casey. ‘We were okay.’ I told myself. ‘For now.’

{...}

I was sitting, moving my leg, noticing the difference. Thankfully, cold water had done the job and it hurt less than before. I noted to myself how I had much worse injuries than this when i was younger. Head open, bloody wrists, broken ribs being the minor ones. A bruised ankle was nothing. But it would slow us down if we needed to flee. So I had to rest, I had to hope, that I'd be able to move again soon because I doubted that Claire or Marcia could do much by themselves. I could tell for Casey yet. She had been quiet and unreactive for the most part. Either because she knew how to hide her fear or because she knew how to lay low.

«It doesn't matter if you open that door.» I told monotonely to Claire who was pushing and pulling the doorknob as if it'd open magically. «There's a second locked door. And a third one even. Which is pretty far I might say.» She started talking, some kind of encouragement speech to lift our spirits up, her voice full of hate and spite for the man that held us here. Yet somehow I couldn't feel the same. I had known anger. Caroline had it, she couldn't hide it, not from me. It was too well rooted inside her, never getting out but still boiling underneath. The twins had it too, but not like Carol, her very foundations were build on anger. I had felt it too, but unlike other people, it exhausted me, drained me. I refused to get angry, it only slowed me down. But there was no anger in that man. Not the kind that could lash out on us. If he planned to unleash fury he’d have done it already. I had given him pleanty of excuses to.

«God, that is victim shit! Jesus!» She snapped after a while. All I could do was look up to her as she let the anger out. Did she even realised that it wasn't anger but fear that she really felt? «We should fight him. We should drop a crazy-ass bomb on him.» She suggested and I couldn't help my smile. "Remember when I used to think that way?" I asked Carlos who stood next to me. He smiled too, the very same smile his sister had, when she looked at her scarred wrists and traced the scars underneath her tattoos. A sad, painful smile of remembrance, of the awful but passed times. "You were positive that you could protect us, even though we were supposed to protect you." He chuckled, petting my head before heading on the back of the Bus to wake his Twin up. They had taken turns, one sleeping and the other watching over me. A strange thing, my Passengers slept separately from my body's function. We could all be wide awake while the Bus was off, and we could sleep separate, as long as someone was driving.

Claire started talking, but I lost a big part of her speech reading Caroline's notes, which Carlotta passed me when she came to join me, about the man's behavior. She had overanalysed him again but that was her job I guess. So many details, yet not big reveals. We knew nothing. These were details on a white paper. We needed the bigger picture. «I saw him carry one of you and lay you on the bed like you weighted nothing.» Casey pointed out. «One punch from him would knock one of us out.»

«I took six months of Kenpo karate class. And you distract the assailant with pain.»

"Is she serious?" Carlos who was still awake groaned walking up to me, his sis following with a mocking smile.

"Let her try, we can humor her later." She proposed, and I smirked. It was mean of me, but I really liked the idea as long she didn't get hurt too badly. She was an idiot, ok. As long me and my Passengers were safe I didn't mind her acting stupid. I wouldn't let her get killed. But if she tried to pull such a trick on this guy, she'd kinda ask for a bruised eye.

«Everything is so easy for you guys.» Casey let a humorless laugh. Looked over Casey, eyes boring into the blonde girl. «You do one thing, you can predict the next thing. It's not the way it's gonna be in this situation. We're not getting out of here.»

"She's a smart one." Carlotta commended again, pushing her brother to get nearer.

«You're saying that you're not gonna fight with everything in you?» She asked in disbelief, her words encouraging, like a speech that was meant to wake some kind of spirit in the listener. But that required more than words, and she lacked in all of them. «You know the only chance... The only chance we have is if we all four of us go crazy on this guy.»

"She has a point." Carlos pointed out, his twin turning to look at him with a poisonous glare. "Not a good point but still." He rushed to correct his sentence alerted by her dark look.

«You're gona pick your miserable self up and help us get out of here.» She stated, ordered, like a little girl, who thought her words had meaning. I wondered if she had ever heard no. Carlotta snored behind me, a mix of a laugh and a dismissive growl.

«Blow me. And your 6 months of karate at the King of Prussia Mall can blow me too.»

"I like this one." The voice of Carol who apparently had woken up made me jump slightly.

«No! No, no you can't do this today! You can't do this right now! Why do you do this? Why do you act like this? Why do you act like you're not one of us? Cory say something!» Claire turned to me, for backup. Asking me to explain to Casey why we had to fight back, because she clearly lacked the patience to do so. I looked up to the girl with the blonde hair, and then to the pale girl sitting in the same bed with me. She had spent several minutes looking on the floor, rocking herself to calm down. She was scared, but her mind was working, putting pieces together, unlike Claire whose ideas popped by clear panic, and inexperience. Part of me, a very narcissistic one, pointed that I was the calmer in here, possibly because I had three grown ups with clear heads and experience in my Bus. I was not alone. They were.

«I am with her.» I just said, nodding towards Casey. Clearly, stating my place in all this. Claire's plan lacked strategy, and I had been blessed with a Marine Soldier, with strategic knowledge, in my Bus. Therefore, I was well aware, her idea was lacking logic. But then again, so did my idea, of kicking the door earlier.

«Are you shitting me right now? Why? You reacted before!»

«I purposely let him hunt me down Claire. I knew he'd leave Marcia alone if one of us was in danger of escaping. I was prepared for him to do what he was gonna do. You won't be.»

«We'll be prepared! We are four! He is one!» It wouldn't make a difference even if it was a dozen of us, if we had her way of thinking. I shook my head at her, reminding myself, she didn't know the true consequences of attacking him. I had been treated kindly, returned unharmed, and she had no example of violence in her life. I shook my head, hair falling on my face due to movement. Even I had no good example of violence in my life, at least not considering to what others had been through. But at the very least I understood why she was being irrational.

«Go ahead and try. I risked my safety once, I am not upsetting him further. He warned me, and I don't plan on misbehaving more.» I stated calmly, thinking I hadn’t left space for discussion. Her outburst was expected, as Caroline explained to me later, I had denied something from a daddy's girl who always got what she wanted, I had done it twice with no regret or fear, shaking her idea as a leader of the group. I had offended her, and she had to bite back.

«MISBEHAVING?!»She screamed in disbelief. «Are you F**king kidding? What daddy issues do you have?!» Silence fell in both the room and the Bus. She didn't know but she had hit a nerve. I pursed my lips together, nothing to confess, nothing to admit to her. She scolded and shook her head. «You are both cowards.»

«If you wanna fight him go ahead Claire. Be brave.» I spoke loud and clear. My voice steady and cold enough to make her freeze in place. She looked at me, this time no confidence in the air around her. «It's not like you need my permission to get yourself killed.» The bitchy smile I offered afterwards, was Carlotta, leaning over me and touching the Wheel. Baring my teeth and narrowing my eyes threateningly, like she always did after trying to stab her brother. Satisfied, I watched the blonde girl shudder and walk up to her friend, clearly upset, and well aware I was right.


	5. Chapter 5

**Caroline**   
I mumbled curses at myself for letting her act on Carlotta’s commands like that.  Stupid girl had kept the Wheel to herself, trying to both play hero and escape her persuitor. Normally I would be mad at Carlotta for advising her such things in the first place. Of course she ended up getting hurt. But I couldn’t bring myself to make a scene now that it was over. Not when Coral fussed and jumped around wondering why he had let her slip so easily and how far she could go the next time.Now, I was not the only one who was worried, we all knew we had to keep an eye to her for unexpected behavor, as much we did for the kidnapper. Previous events had made it clear that Coraline and captivity could be an awful duo.

“Professor.” Carlos’ voice rang sharp and urgent and my head lazily turned towards where he stood. All of them were standing up front, seemingly too focused on something I couldn’t see yet. But when I got up and reach the front part I understood their alarm. The man was back. It was expected he’d return. But this was no man we were looking at. It was a woman. It was the man, yes. But he wore femine clothing, and heels. They stood at the door, one hand on the knob, other delicately in the air. I looked up to the woman, not missing her surprised, and satisfied look, as if she had hit a jackpot and not unlocked a room full of teenage girls with no free will. Was this D.I.D.? What were the possibilities he had the same disorder Coral had? What were the posibilities he’d kidnap someone like him? I had no doubt this was another person. Everything, and I mean everything was different. Clothing, posture, expressions, even theur voice. If this was not D.I.D. he deserved an Oscar for such performance. 

«Don't worry, I'll talk to him... He listens to me....» The lady reassured the girls, eyes wandering on each one of them, pausing to us. For a few moments she said nothing, smiling at Coral as if she's smiling at a scared kid, which she did, it wasn't hard to tell, that the shocked expresion on Coral's eyes was most likely reflected in her body. The woman's eyes stood twice as long on Casey, and as I looked at both their expressions, I came to realise, the lady mocked Casey's fear and shock. 'Such behaviour', I noted to myself, 'endicates she's familiar with that kind of reactions.' 'Much like us' I pushed the thought away.

«He's not well.» She said again, suggesting either a underground infondness of the previous alter or a simple behaviour she didn't approve of. «He knows what you're here for. He's not allowed to touch you. He knows that.» She reassured again, but the girls were too freaked out to be comforted by her words, Coral on the other hand, who knew what this all probably meant and paid attention to her words, let a sigh of relief. A weight seemed to have left her shoulders. Her worst fear had been quieted down. How I wanted to remind her that she wasn't but giving empty promises.

We all stiffed when she turned her attention to us again and spoke. «Is your leg alright, dear?» She asked almost kindly but Coral didn't answer, looking at me in panic. She had no idea how to handle the sudden kindness, especially knowing there were probably sinister intentions behind it. I grabbed the Wheel from Coral and she let me. The sensation that crawled up your skin when taking control of the Bus was the strangest of things. I wasn't just touching a Wheel. I was taking full control of a body, full control of a brain, and every nerve, muscle and bone that came with it. I was not certain if the others felt it too, but I always felt the tide change direction, depending to who sat to the Wheel before me.

«It is. I used cold water.» I said, my voice coming out weird. I could not recall the last time I had driven, and it felt like I had forgotten how to. My tongue was surprisingly light, too easy to tangle it. My British accent was already hard to hide without forgeting the basic function's of this body, let alone now, having to drive after so long.

«Silly thing. Did you really think you could kick the door down?» She chuckled amused. Her expression almost kind. I smiled back, attempting friendliness, watching whether she'd take it like a simple social interaction or some sort of attack. I looked down at the injured leg. Coral had blocked us when this happened, but knowing her, she wouldn't have just kicked down a door. 

«It seems easier when other do it. » I shrugged moving the foot around. Coraline had claimed to barely feel the pain but now that I was driving, it hurt like hell. Suddenly I was too aware of Coraline's petite fraim and fragile body. Watching from behind I had never realised, how small she still was. She had barely grown up. How could Carlotta drive so comfortably? She was two heads taller than her and yet she seemed to manage the strangeness of driving a shorter host.

«Hah, I guess red-heads do have fire. I'll bring you some ice.» The lady chuckled, and I looked up. My glare must not have been the friendlier, because she immediatly straightened her body and stretched her skirt, uncomfortably. I couldn't help my pride. She obviously wasn't the type of person to give out a reaction, and yet I had taken one out. But then I couldn't help my failure, she would be more compossed next time, and her reaction was nothing helpful.

«That would be lovely, thank you ma'am.» 

«Of course sweety.» She smiled widely, and walked out, sending kisses to all of us before closing the door. Next to me, Coral colapsed, sitting down on the stairs of the bus, burying her head to her hands, she sobbed, both relieved and scared. I looked down on her, as the Twins sat by her side and hugged her, comforting her. 

"Coraline, Carlos, Carlotta go take a walk please. Go outside, calm down a bit." I told them and Coral looked up to me, face blank. "I'll drive a little while longer." I reassured her. She only nodded and got up, the doors opening for her to walk out. Carlotta got out with her but Carlos remained, and when they had walked a bit farther, questioned.

"He has D.I.D.?" 

"Apparently." I responded softly and he sighed tired. He looked out the window, at his sister and Coral walking side by side, going towards the Bus Stop and sitting there to wait for Carlos.

"Can you handle this?" He asked intesively. Normally I would be offended by his narsisistic idea that he could handle the situation and fail and I had no right to try. But just this once I knew he was more on edge than ever. So I smiled, and nodded with certainty. If anyone could mimic Coral's behavor without getting notice it was me. I just needed to get a better handle on this driving thing. Somehow comforted by my confidence he relaxed and greeted me goodbye before walking out. 

I closed the doors of the Bus and looked the iron door on the other side of the room, wondering how soon the woman would return with the ice, so I could get her to talk a little more. I need to speak to one of them. I needed the slightest bit of information to calm me down. Thinking back at how she handled the situation it dawned on me that if the man listened to her, she was one rank higher than him, and she probably had some little affect on him. We needed to see her side of things. Her motives behind the kidnapping of 4 teenagers.

'She's dangerous.' I thought, subconsiously digging up, the picture of a woman I once knew. A woman who would probably get along well with the lady-alter that had walked out.

{...} 

I laid on the bed for a very long while. The girls had fallen earily silent, upset by the strange behavor of the man. They sat at their beds, pale and shaken up, leaning towards one another, looking for comfort from each other. I was laying on my side, examining their faces, guessing their thoughts.

«He's just trying to scare us.» Claire declaired. Stuborn as ever, denying the idea that the man was doing anything else than playing with their minds. I didn't bother explaining, that the man was simply traumatised and sick. No point in telling her it was a relatevily common thing to have when you have been through shit as a child. I didn't want to let her know, or the others for that matter, that Coraline was like him, and she was harmless.

«He was having a full conversation with himself.» The darkhaired opposed, voice low, barely to be heard. «What was that line about? "The food is waiting"?» When had this been said I didn’t know but the unique choice of words peequed my interest. Casey seemed to be equally confused, but still remained silent, eyebrows drawned in, her face puzzled. She was obviously lost in thought. Putting pieces together, wondering too, what this meant. Claire on the other hand had no time to think, her mouth running faster than her thoughts. She moved nervously before agressively opening her mouth to speak.

«Does everyone gets how wacked this is and that we need to get out of here now?» Her last words where confused into a scared cry as the lights turned on. All heads turned to the door opening, and I moved my body into a sitting position, the same moment Claire turned her whole body towards the door. The man, the first one we had met, walked in. A bucket in hand, filled with what looked like a cleaning tools and chemicals. He looked at the floor, glimsing at us, before walking to the bathroom. 

«N-No!»He stuttered, walking out clearly upset and pointing at the bathroom . «Please, keep your area neat. The bathroom, it's unexeptable.» He stuttered again, fighting to form the sentence. 'Severe O.C.D.' I reminded myself. 'Contamination Type' He went on a bit, about how he had colorcoded the bottles and hesitated a bit, before keeping, with a serious face, the bucket in his hand in front of him, suggesting that we take it and clean. I was the first to move, at the same moment with Casey but he stopped me.

«No, you sit down. The rest of you.» He said, pointing at me and then making a motion for them to move. Casey got up, and walked in the bathroom, taking the bucket on her way in, carefully not to touch him or look at him while doing so. Behind her followed Claire, brave as ever, (or should I say foolish) dragging her friend by the hand. They entered the room, and from where I sat, I could see Marcia kneeling on the floor, possibly coping her friend, who probably was coping Casey. The man shoved his hands into his pockets and sighed, looking at them and then taking a step back to look at all of us.

«Patricia has reminded me that, I was sent to get you for a reason. That you are sacred food...» He said, like that explained something. Maybe for him it did but for us it meant more questions. «And I promise not to bother you again...» He added, his words somewhat reminding a stuborn apology. He sighed again, when no recived no response and turned to me, letting the girls, clean the bathroom. 'Do they even know how to clean?' I wondered as he walked up to me.

He offered his hand and I hesitantly took it. Not because of some idea of trust, but because I knew that if I didn't, he might grab me and drag me out by force, regadless his apology and promise not to. Coral would have let her guard down, had she heard him say those things. I knew better. He helped me stand up and led me out of the room, led me to a chair where I sat. I was more than surprised of how carefully he led me all this way here, hands never wandering, patiently, dispate my speed, and never letting me put weight on the leg that was hurt. 

«Take your shoe off.» He ordered as soon as I sat down. I did as I was told, taking the liberty of removing the sock too, afterwards. To the table next to me, was a pack of ice which he took and placed on my ankle. The pain was sharp and quick to hit me and I couldn't help the cry that escaped me, causing the man to startle. He passed me the ice and told me to keep it there and moved away. I watched as he passed around the room, tidying things up. And momentaraly, I forgot, where I was and with who. His quick pace and nervousness, the quiet around the room as I sat and objerved, reminded me of Coral's mother, when her husband was out.

She'd walk around the same way, tidying things that even I, the adult within the child, couldn't tell why they were important. She was always fast. Like an arrow, darting from one side of the room to another. Coral always on her seat in the kitchen, watching her mother, never talking, letting her calm down, release the stress she kept in. It felt the same. It was the same rhythmical steps, only heavier, that echoed around us. So I wasn't trully on my guard when I opened my mouth and spoke. 

«Just to clarify... We're gonna die, right?» I questioned and he stopped like I had paused a video. Froze mid movement. He turned his head towards me, so slowly it partly creeped me out. The spell broke, Coral's mother would never look at her like that. Had Coral's mother heard such thing, she'd immediatly know, it was not her daughter talking. Coral's mother always saw a child but still discrited it from the adult. I don't know how I hadn't seen it earlier. It's not like I was not already aware, but the look he gave me was like a slap in the face. This man held himself back. He saw no child, no adult. He saw a girl. A woman's body. And having seen it myself, a rather appealing one, thanks to Carlotta. It wasn't hard to tell anymore, the slightest clue was ringing bells. 'Intrusive Thought Type?' The thought popped out of nowhere. 'Is this connected with his O.C.D.?' I wondered

«...You will be sacrificed.» He revealead slowly, like he was testing the words on his tongue. He turned away as soon as the words left his lips. Hurrily he shoved some clothes in a washing maschine, avoiding to speak or look at me. Part of me wondered what his role was, was he a soldier, or a willingly faithful follower? 'Sacred food...' Was he being literal? Cannibalism was extreme, but not unheard of. And when we were dealing with obsessions, nothing was too extreme.

«Intresting choice of words, but hardly an answer.»I responded but he ignored me, refusing to give me a clear answer. As a phychologist I knew better than to press for answers, but just this once I could tell it would work. So I came up with an example. «In India, people sacrifice their hair to gods, when they have nothing else to offer. But I don't suppose it's our hair you want.» To be fully honest, I already knew the answer. I already knew that we wouldn't make it out alive. I don't know why I needed to hear it so badly. Why I needed to be sure, that those were his (her?) motives. 

«He asked to eat, to feed off the impure young.» He finally said. At first I gave it a thousand and one meanings. But eventually, I decided to accept it. He was not being metaphorical, he wasn't speaking in riddles. He told me the truth, thinking I would dismiss it as a lie. Satisfied and bitter, with the slightest piece of infomarmation I was able to extract, I proceded in analising what this meant. But I couldn't help but be distracted by the force he used to close the washing machine's door.

«Do my questions irritate you?» I asked slowly. He glared at me again. I couldn't bring myself to look scared or upset. 'We're gonna die anyway.' So I returned the cold stare, with a poker face on. He grabbed a first-aid kit from a self, taking out some bandages, and kneeling in front of me. The red bag tossed on the table, revealed a pair of needles and bottles. And glancing up to the self where the bag was previously placed, I found more medical supplies. One of the boxes markes with the name Jade on it. Someone how visited? Another victim? Another alter perhaps? «If I upset you I shall stop.» 

«Please do.» He mumbled through his teeth. So I did. I closed my mouth and remained silent as he removed the ice from the leg, which now felt strangely sore and warm. I tried to remind myself that he had an Anxiety Disorder, and that upseting him was not a good idea. But I found myself strangling to control the flow of the conversation (interogation?). I hadn't had any social contact outside of the Bus for years, I had lost my touch. He held the injured leg on one hand, banging it up with the other. His hold was gentle, careful, but his movements agressively quick. When he was done, he paused, holding my leg for a while, his sight wondering higher and higher, and when his eyes reached my thighs, with the speed of a tiger, he shot up and took the first-aid kit to put it back in it's place. 

«May I ask a favour?» I asked slowly, knowing I was pressuring my luck, by talking again. An excausted sigh echoed the room and he didn't reply for a while, making me think he wouldn't allow me to ask. I had to admit he had been remarkably patient so far. It was a shame he couldn't take a little more.

«I do not promise I'll do it.» His response was soft and unexpected. I looked up to him, caught off guard. He still was refusing to look at me but I had heard him loud and clear.

«Pass him a message, a request. Last wish if you prefer.»

That must had intruiged him because he finally turned again, eyes locking with mine, filled with curiousity. He folded his hand on his chest, frowning. «Go on.» He encouraged. I bit my lip. I tried to choose the right words, to make it sound humane, as if Coral and the Twins were in the Bus, and would scold such request. I had to remind myself I was alone, and they'd never know of this. 

«Tell him to make it quick. If it is flesh he wants, he can doesn't need us suffering, I hope.» I said eventually, and I could swear I saw him hold his breath. His expression remained the same, frowned, confused, but somewhere in between, he seemed bothered. 'Not something a normal person would ask' I scold myself. I always advised Coral to act normal, pass unnoticed, and here I was doing the opposite. But then again, was it not normal, to ask for a painless death?

«I shall pass your request on.» He assured me and I nodded with regard. But he didn't seem to look away. Instead, he took his time, probably choosing his own words this time. «Are you at peace with it?» His face had fallen, a dark expression taking over. Was he trully the bad guy here? 

«Death?» I asked, and he gave a short nod. A serious question, one no one could ever answer trully correctly and fully honestly. My eyes fell on the mirror behind him. I wasn't looking at myself. I was looking at Coral. He was looking at Coral too. For all he knew he chatted with a normal girl. Looking at Coral's reflexion again after so long, I recalled her life so far. No. I wasn't at peace with death. Especially not Coraline's. But... «I suppose you know as well as I do, that there are worse fates to suffer.» I smiled bitterly at him. Or maybe it was Coral I was smiling to.


	6. Chapter 6

**Coraline**

I followed Carlotta out of the Bus, leaving Carlos and Caroline inside. She hadn't driven since forever. It was one time we visited Dr. Fletcher she distanced herself from the idea of driving again. She had taken over, to talk to her, cover whatever she could, and that was the last time I ever saw her drive. Just like that. She had just given up the idea of coming out anymore. Some days I still wonder what Dr.Fletcher told her something that had made her give up the Wheel. 

We walked down the Safe Road slowly, waiting for Carlos to catch up. Carlotta, equally nervous with me, her favourite butterfly flying ans swifting on her left hand, nervously biting her lip. I was mostly focused on the sounds around. Carol found it strange, for some reason how realistic the Mindscape was. I looked down the road we had left behind, scenes still playing in the air, memories and echoes. If I walked down that road I could see details in the memories I had perhaps missed before. But my Passengers wouldn't let me. It was possible for me to get hurt along the way. Fears had the tendency of taking form and attack whoever got near their Memory, and other Feelings and Thoughts were bothered if we got too close to theirs. So we only took the Safe Road that led to the Farm, and if walked up to the little Bus Station Kiosk, the Bus would soon pass to pick us up.

"Weird lady, huh?" Carlotta asked breaking the silence. I looked at her, she was playing with her knife, looking at the memory we had left behind replay again and again. The woman, the alter I suppose, smiling at us, nicely attempting conversation about my injured leg. I wasn't sure what to made of her. She was weird, yes. But that might had been because it was a male body she inhabited. Her clothes and posture reminded me of the ladies that came in church every Sunday. Her attitude awfully familiar, even though I couldn't place it. Something slightly disturbing about the way she smiled. 

First thought was my father's sister she reminded me of, a sinister aura was always surrounding her. The way she blew kisses at us, the way she closed the door and addressed the girls, her tone. Something simply dominant and dangerous hidden underneath sweet smiles and gentle movements. On second thought she reminded me of my mother, her sweet and light voice when she asked and joked about my ankle, I couldn't help but distinct something motherly, no concern but some care, if that made sense. Sofia? They definitely had the same strong confident vibe. It was vibrating around them. The traditional female. Not the tv heroine, but the scary housewife. My aunt and and Sofia had it both, my mother lacked the confidence.

‘ _Don’t overanalyse everything’_

"If they hadn't kidnapped us, I might have liked her." I admitted, blushing at how naive that sounded. I was fond of all of them, so the combination must had been a wonderful company to have. She obviously was hostile, as much one could be to their prisoners. She was bothered to reassure us for one kind of safety, even though she didn't have to. She was nice. As nice as I could expect her to be.

"I don't like her." She grumbled her knife spinning in her hands with more force than before. It was amazing how comfortable she was with blades. The way her wrist moved and circled around, she wasn't afraid of getting hurt. Not by the blade. I understood her anxiousness, the reasons she disliked the new alter, and the situation we were into. She felt like she had a duty of care, and sometimes I got the impression she though of me as naive. She always suspected peoples intentions more than I. I would be surprised if for the lady alter had been any different.

"She reminds me of Sofia a bit. Aunt Karen too." I admitted. I tried to think of what exactly, but Carlotta already had the answer for me. 

"The 'I enjoy your company but I might smash your head and make a lovely soup' type? " She suggested and I paused, looking at her. It was a fair way to describe the vibe she gave. But then again, wasn't it a bit extreme? I mean, Sofia was always so sweet and patient... Except the time she punched the neighbor that spread rumors for me. Or when she slapped with a book and kicked her out, for mocking my disorder. When she called Caroline a bitch.

"Kinda...?" I responded unsure, after a little while, praying Sofia would never know I had linked her behaviour to that of my kidnappers. Because if she knew she might do just that.

"Yeah, ok, I see the resemblance." 

"Not talking shit about me I hope?" Carlos called from afar, walking closer to us with big steps. The Bus was far ahead already, leaving us behind, an also funny picture because Caroline was unused to driving that she almost got out of the Road. 

"Not at all. She was just telling me about that time when-" I started, ready to come up with a story. His eyes went wide, first looking at me and then at his sister.

"Lies!" He interrupted and passed us, walking away, not to hear the rest. Carlotta and I chuckled behind his back. He was far down the Safe Road when I started running to catch up with him, Carlotta jogging behind me. Once again I mused at how lucky I was I could run here without ever getting tired.

{...}

When we reached the Farm I had made plans about how I would spent my day. The house, unchanged and huge as always greeted us with open doors, Rocky, my dog alter, running up on us barking as soon as he noticed us. We didn't take him to the Bus anymore, he couldn't drive obviously, and he often got nervous when in it. So he spent the days in the Farm, running and playing around.When we didn't have crisis like this one, Caroline stayed here with him, while the Twins and I drove.

In both reality and Mindscape, the Farm was a refuge. A safe territory, where no Fear tresspassed. It was an old ugly, traditional house, with no much modern equipment. But it was home. More than any other house I had over the years. In real life, the farmhouse was small. Two rooms, one of them barely a room. In my Mindscape, it changed. At first it had two rooms, naturally, but when the Twins appeared, two more rooms appeared out of nowhere, and the house changed it's shape. So I had reason to believe, the house was not only refuge for me, but for the Passengers, too. The most peaceful part of my mind.

I left the Twins relax in the living room, Carlos fell on the couch groaning tired. Carlotta making her way to the kitchen. After telling them were I'd go, I made my way down to the Basement, Rocky following close behind me. From there I entered the Underground. The Underground was a place of shortcuts and Safe Paths. A labyrinth fo anyone who was not me. I could visit various Memories without passing any unwanted areas, but that didn't mean I couldn't get hurt in the Memory I chose. 

Dr. Fletcher and I had spent lots of time sorting out Memories and removing Fears out of some. It was amazing. As Fears left their territories and died out, I felt lighter and lighter. School wasn't a chore. I no longer woke up from nightmares and I drove more and more, confidence building up with every Fear that left my memories. The best part, though, was that I could now visit mom's memories without Fears hurting me. So when we visited the Farm, I never missed the chance to wonder a bit, relive happy Memories, examine strange old ones. It was nice to get to know myself better.

This time, though, I didn't visit forgoten Moments, instead I took my most used path and made my way straight to the days my mother was alive. Specifically, to the days we took refuge to the Farm, the one place Papa couldn't find us. I let chance decide for me. I through a ball and let it roll, the door outside of which stopped, I entered. Chance didn't disappoint me. 

_«Mama?» A voice echoed in the house, a tiny girl with orange wavy hair walking in the long corridor, wood creaking underneath her feet. Shadows danced on the floor, her own shadow split in seven different ones._

_«I'm here, my dear.» Another voice called out, from the living room, the girl immediately running towards it. Climbing up to the couch and cuddling with her mother, the girl sighed at the familiar warmth and safety. She had spent hours playing in the farm that morning, and she had spent more hours reading with her guardian, just to avoid going to sleep even though she was exhausted. Eventually she seeked out safety to her mother's arms, a place not so safe but at least comforting._

_«Do we have to go back, tomorrow?» The child asked quietly, her mother's finger enwinded in her hair, creating a tight fishbone braid, humming a random lullaby. Her own fiery hair were also tangled in a braid, only looser and simple, for her daughter didn't know how to make her hair yet. Like looking in the mirror it was. The daughter, a miniture of her mother. Both a curse and a blessing._

_«I suppose we could stay a couple of days longer.» The woman answered softly, earily calm, and energetic. She was always so tired, so on edge and always so sharp. It was a nice change, one the girl, hadn't even notice at the time._

_«And Papa?»_

_«He'll be fine.» She responded quickly, avoiding the subject.'What a liar she had been.' Her hands pulling with more force the stray hair but immediatly relaxing when the girl whined in pain. «Do you wanna hear a myth?»She asked a hint of happiness in her voice. The girl looked up her brown eyes frowning worried. «Papa won't know...» Her mother reassured, reading the girl's mind. The daughter smiled, nodding excited and immediatly the mother began to speak, her voice colored as the story started to unraveled. «Once there was a man named Orpheus. He was a musician, a very talended one, and he loved to play the lyre. They say he played so beautifully that wild animals turned into pets and trees bended to hear it better.»_

_«That's not possible!» The girl exclaimed, interapting the story before it even began._

_«If the music is good, Gorgonida mu, everyone stops and listens.» The mother responded as she tied the last of the hair together.«Orpheus was married to Euridiki. A beautiful woman-»_

_«More beautiful than Helen? Or Medusa?» The girl inturapted again.Two times before had her mother told her greek myths and both were unforgetable. One was the story about the war of Troy, and the most beautiful woman, Helen. I had taken a month to cover the whole story, one full month of myths and legends at the same farm they lived now. And one was the adventure of Perseas. The story about corals, and their origin. The story of an equally powerful and beautiful woman that doomed men. Myths. Stories. That little girl was never shaped to those heroine. Her beauty was her own doom and only._

_«I doubt it, darling. But still, for Orpheus she was the prettiest of all!» She chuckled. Turning the girl to sit more comfortable. «Now, hush and listen, please.» She pressed a finger to her lips. «Euridiki was beautiful, and another man loved her, Aristaios. But she didn't love him and so she run away from him.»_

_«Like we run from Papa?» Once again the younger redhead interapted, unable to keep back her question. Her mother's heart broke, her daughter was so innocent, she asked if it was the same, as if they both had the same simple nature. Looking at the girl, now, I, too, wiped for her fate._

_«Let's not talk about Papa, ok?» Rewatching the memory I could now tell she avoided the subject subtly, like me, locked away from him she wanted the reality and memories to disappear. But the little girl only wanted to speak out about the one thing her mother refuge to talk about. «So as Euridiki run from Aristaios, she stepped on a snake and it bit her. And died and her soul went to Hades, the Underworld.»_

_«Oh no!» The girl exclaimed again, this time her mother ignored her and continued as if she hadn't spoken._

_«Orpheus was so sad. He couldn't live without her. So he took his lyre and went to Aheroda, the river between the land of the dead and the living. His sad song charmed Haroda, the boatman who passed the souls on the other side and so he made an exception and allowed Orpheus, even though he was alive, to cross the river.» It wasn't hard to tell the mother held back chuckles when looking at her daughter's wide eyes. The little thing seemed to have gotten so lost in the myth that had forgotten the world around her. And now older, I still seemed to forget where I was. It was a charm of my mother's, she could make you forget everything for a few hours, no matter what it was that bothered you._

_«The gates of Hades guard Cerberus, a huge three headed dog, but he also fell asleep when he heard Orpheus' lullabies. So eventually, Orpheus, reached Pluto's throne, and told him why he was there. At first, Pluto was mad, that a mortal had made it so far, but Orpheus songs were so sad that even he cried tears of iron.» The girl strangled not to ask how he could have cried iron. She didn't want to inturapt again but as the story went on she had more and more questions. «Persephone, Pluto's wife, begged him to grant Orpheus his wish, and because he had enjoyed the music so much and he loved his wife even more, he did. »_

_«How romantic...» The girl sighed smiling softly. Now watching, after all this time, I admired her for believing in romance still. And I wiped knowing her world would soon shatter, to be build again from pieces. Was is it not ironic. Persephone, even though loved, had been abdacted from her flowery fields. She had strangled and starved herself to resist her captor. Just to fall for him, love him and rule by his side._

_«But. There was a catch.Euridiki, would follow Orpheus on the world of the living. But only if he didn't turn to look at her, before they reached the Above world, and the sunlight had kissed Euridiki'skin. Of course, Orpheus accepted, and they took the road back. Orpheus got out first, and immediatly, worried about his loved one, turned to look at her. But she hadn't got out yet. So the deal was broken and Orpheus lost his love one forever.» The story ended, the girl had taken a sour expression, poutting her lips and frowning at her mother. There was a long pause, she hoped the story hadn't ended yet. But when her mother didn't speak, she knew it was over._

_«I don't like it.»_

_«I know. Do you know what the moral of this myth is?» Her mother asked her._

_«Same as with Perseus. Never trust a king.» Her word was final. No room for doubt. The childish certainty of a girl for whom the worse had yet to come. Her mother laughed, she had told her the moral od Perseus story but she seemed to have forgoten it. Stuck in her own head._

_«No, love. Orpheus made a deal, it wasn't Pluto's fault.» She shook her head still chuckling, amused by her daughters spirit that she rarely got to see at the house.Her husband, like any traditionally raised man, demanded respect from his 'Whore's bastard ' «The moral of the story... is that you must be patient and have trust to those you love. Had Orpheus trusted that Euridiki was following him and she could take care of herself, had he waited for her to come to him, like he had come for her... They would be together.» «Trust, patience and acceptance. The things Orpheus lacked.»_

_«I still don't like it.» The girl shook her head with disapproval. She did not yet care of the morals. She had no care why it happened. For her, the story had ended, the ending was bitter and there was nothing to do to change it. «What about Pluto and Persephone? How did they met? What happened to the boat guy? Or to Aristaios?» The girl questioned excited, pulling away from her mother's arms to look up to her with longing agony to know, to hear more stories, to forget once more. It must be that hasn't change since that day. The desire to forget._

_«Hmm... More stories, for another day. Off to sleep now.» Her mother got up, taking the girl in her arms. She walked down the corridor, entered the smaller room in the house, and placed the little girl to the bed. With a single kiss on her forehead, she was out the door, light out, ready to close the door behind her._

_«Goodnight mama.» The girl called out._

_«Sweet dreams Coral, say goodnight to Caroline too...»_

I exited the Memory with a smile, feeling nostalgic. Looking up, I saw Carlos leaning against a wall. The look in his eyes erased the smile from my lips, landed me back to reality. He had this same expression every time he told me stories of the war. Distant and defensive. "The Professor is here." 


	7. Chapter 7

**Coraline**   
We walked out of the Basement, Rocky walking close behind us. We paced away from my happy Memories in silence. Dreadful, deep silence. Whatever it was Carol had to say was no good. I must had lost track of time, for Carol to have come back with news. Memories were meant to either last seconds or hours. Unpredictable, impossible to tell how long since they started while trapped in them. Unless you where Carol, that is. She never lost track of time.

"So... what's new?" I called out, as I entered the living room. Carol was sitting in her armchair a glass of wine on hand. Carlotta on the couch, a beer in hand, another closed on the table waiting for Carlos. Rocky ran straight to Carol and with on jump he was on her crossed legs, licking her face, filled with happiness. He always had a soft spot for the Professor, and she for him. Possibly because they both belong to the Farm instead of the Bus. They never drove, they only wished their solitude, the two alters that reminded me that I too was meant for peace.

"Sit down, Coral." Caroline sighed petting Rocky, who had now settled down and enjoyed the company. "And do ignore Carlos' frowned face. He is overdramatic." She added with a flick of her hand and a humorless laugh from Carlos. 

"That's good to hear." I commented, letting my body fall on the couch, right next to Carlotta. Carlos took the bottle from the table, but instead of sitting with us he stood and leaned by the window. I turned at the Professor, expecting the awful but not so awful news and -just my luck- she got straight to the subject.

"They plan to kill you." She announced, as if was letting me know whether or not it’d rain tomorrow. I was not surprised by neither her answer, nor her careless tone. She was often apathetic when it came to such situations. Still hearing it as a stated fact, it stung to know that the danger was real. I had successfully so far kept calm and avoided facing it.

"...Lovely." Was all I could say about the unfortunate new info we had. Of course one could comment the persistence of the universe's attempts to kill me, but I could tell it was not the time for humor. Humor wouldn’t quite work right now, at least. I could make as many jokes I wanted, no one would even break a smile.

"I'm overdramatic, you see..." Sarcasm was impossible to miss in Carlos' voice, who was obviously irritated by Carol's lack of empathy towards him. "Nothing but your life is at stake." He huffed. Carol ignored him, sipping her wine.

"Some sort of sacrifice, from what I know so far." She added. “I haven’t established anything else as fact. I just have theories and questions." The air was gloom, no one spoke, no one voiced the awful thoughts that we all had anyway. A team divided by our own fears. We were hypocrites. Me more than them. I was  _such_ a hypocrite. I didn't care about the girls, if they lived or died, nothing changed, I would again lock myself in the Farm, act as if it never happened. Hadn't I after all, done the same before? Hadn't I told myself, it wasn't so bad, and believed the lie so much, I ended up, trying to convince others of it. Brainwashed, Stocholm Syndrome, or whatever they called it. I still strangled to believe it with all my will.

_'No! He didn't mean to hurt me! He's my Papa! It wasn't his fault! I'm okay! Please! Papa loves me' I screamed to the officers that drugged us out. Even I could tell I was lying._

_'Papa loves you little girl' He growled in my ear, as I screamed in pain in his. 'Daddy loves you so very much.' Carlos pulling me away from the seat, taking my place on this torture. It didn't matter, when I took the light back, next morning I still ached. I still remembered fragments of the reality I refused to face._

"The girls?" Carlos questioned, Carol laughing coldly and clicking her tongue annoyed. I had guessed that she wouldn't get along with them. Even though she had treated patients and knew very well how to socialize, it was her least favorite activity. She would always go on and on about how after getting on retirement she had realized that she had enough of people's bs and only her grandchildren deserved her patience. Of course, soon, me and the Twins were added in the short list of people that wouldn't face Caroline's rage.

"Idiotic as ever." She grumbled, circling the lips of the glass with her finger, a high note sound piercing our ears. "Save for Casey. She seems to be smart, she keeps low." She admitted, sipping the last of her wine and letting the glass on the table, pushing Rocky off her legs in the progress, the dog barked, landing on his feet and immediately choosing the empty space on the couch between me and Carlotta to settle instead.

"Coral you need to prepare yourself for what is to possibly come." Carlos sighed and he sounded exhausted. I turned at him confused, how was one to prepare for death? How was one to prepare for anything painful? I knew. He did it too. I had tried to prepare many times but somehow it always surprised me. Pain, betrayal, violence. It took a tiny act of mercy to raise hope and then crash it. No way to prepare for any sort of cruelty. 

"Time shall come you might get the chance to run away." He begun to explain and I shifted uncomfortably on the couch. I already knew what he was gonna say, this telepathy working ahead of us. " _Don't_ bother trying to get another one out." I pierced my lips together something bitter on my tongue, kept my eyes to the ground. 

"If you manage to get out, run straight to the Police and pray you are not late. But do not attempt to play hero." Caroline added and I turned at her, face sour. I had spent so long pretending to be brave, that taking the light was not so hard. That I could do. Now I had to run. Be a coward. I hated how well aware I was that I could that too. "Be reasonable girl." She snapped out of the blue, hissing at me, her calm demeanor fading away. "You will need as much help as you can get."

"She's right." Carlotta agreed surprising us all. "As much I'd like to kick his ass, if we are to be practical you'll have to run away." She explained monotonously, her voice harsh and cold, much like everyone else in the room. I knew what they were doing. They played adults, serious and cold, I was the child and I needed to understand. I hated them for that. I only wanted to pretend it was alright, that we'd get through this one way or another.

"Do you understand?" Carlos looked into my eyes and I returned the stern look. 

"I understand." I responded mechanically, without giving it any thought. He paused, not tearing his eyes from mine. I strangled not to blink, not to show him weakness. Because at that moment I felt weaker than I had felt in years. I felt exhausted. I felt cold. 

"Will you do it?" He whispered. But the answer didn't come like before. Would I do it? Had I the chance to run, would I save my skin or risk it, trying to save another? It was easy to say I wouldn’t, but knowing myself there was always the possibility I'd act impulsively. 

"I'll try." I told them eventually, and thankfully it was enough for them to let it go. They all seemed unsatisfied with it, Caroline even had this look of doubt on her face before nodding and standing up slowly. I always despised this thing she did. Unlike Carlos who looked into my eyes, and shared his worries, Carol would look away and hide them. Almost like she disapproved. As if I disappointed her, when this was the last thing I wanted to do.

"Let's go, it's been precisely three hours since I left the Bus. Shall they try to wake you they will be worried, you're not responding. Last we need is for them to panic more." 

{...}

Just when we reached the Bus, the doors automatically opened to allow us entrance. As we entered, immediately we were greeted by Claire's voice calling out my name in whispers. 

"Just in time." I thought to myself and without waiting time I sat and started the Bus. Immediately I felt the cold of the room surround me. I opened my eyes slowly and looked at the wall in front of me. The white drywall somehow warmer in the yellow light than my old gray walls at home.

«Cory. Cory wake up.» Claire called from behind me and I stirred trying to wake up properly. I felt sore, my face felt swollen from the sleep I clearly needed. My freshly woken up body was still relaxed from the deep sleep, and it affected positively my mind. I stretched my muscles and pushed my body up, but as I did, a figure on the open door entered my peripheral vision. I turned sharply my whole body towards the door, there sat, once again the man. He sat with his legs crossed, an excited, sly and wide smile across his face. There was a glimpse in his eye I hadn't seen in the previous alters. Something playful, mischievous. 

«My name is Hedwig. I have red socks.» He introduced himself grinning evilly, but still for some reason not feeling very threatening. His voice stuttered in a childish way, 's' altered in a toothless 'th' sound and for a moment I paused stunned by the realization of who/what he was. 

"Please tell me that's not a child." Carlos' voice came from behind me, reading my thoughts once more.

«H-Hi. I'm Coraline.» I greeted back without thinking, my mind foggy probably from the sleep, and still processing the boy's presence. His smile widened, and he gave a waved at me happily, that pure gesture melting away my defenses. We weren't in danger from this alter. At least not directly. The lady clearly had consciousness of her actions and the same went for the man who had brought us here. But a kid could hardly cause harm through its decisions.

"She definitely is." Carlotta commented amused motioning at me with her head and I blushed furiously.

"Shut up." I told them cheeks reddening more. It was so surreal. This must have been the first proper interaction with this man. A completely innocent, pure action of a child. Of course there was always the possibility of lying but I knew better than that. There was no doubt here, that we were dealing with more than one person, no trying to deny it. I had been doubted before myself. Belief always seemed to lesser problems. Then was the problem of keeping up. We hadn’t known this man for long, and three alters had already talked to us. Which either meant he had lots of triggers, or he had given up control. Either way I knew I had to keep up with the changes and stay on their good side no matter what.

«He's... On the... move. » I heard him say and the sentence caught me off guard, disoriented by my awakening and the strange change of topic (from an introduction to a riddle) I frowned at him, tilting my head on the side curious. I looked around, wondering if the others had any clues about what he meant but they didn't even looked curious, just scared. I was on my own.

«What?» Casey questioned puzzled next to me. Just like me, (I was being oddly calm compered to the others) she was alerted but apathetic, unlike the other two who were a "boo" away from complete terror. He held back a laugh and leaned towards us, like telling a secret.

«He's. On. The move.» He repeated slowly this time, emphasizing each word with mischief. The words sounded odd, coming from a kid. The secrecy, the unclear message behind the phrase. It sounded like a phrase one would copy from a movie, a catchy sentence that meant something to someone who knew the full plot. Maybe the lady had said it at some point, he had simply picked it up.

«Who?» Someone in the room whispered pitifully, her voice breaking as if she in the verge of tears. I looked around to locate the terrified girl but all seemed to feel the same amount of terror in them. Momentarily I wondered if I should be equally afraid, or at least pretend to be to join the team. I pushed the thought away, telling myself it didn't matter, cause I didn't care and neither did anyone else.

«Someone is coming for you. And... you're not gonna like it.» Hedwig smiled wickedly and to my complete surprise Carol started laughing. She laughed loudly without holding back, no care about her usual manners and discretion. She laughed like a child, purely and by heart. Other than the strange timing, I couldn't miss the grave situation at which she found something humorous. 

"What is it Carol?" I asked, taken aback from her unexpected response but she dismissed me, flipping her wrist in a 'don't worry' gesture. That only piqued my curiosity. How could something that made her of all people laugh be unimportant. 

"I'll tell you later" She chuckled, and kept laughing like she maniac. Strangely enough it was easily transported into me, and soon I found myself fighting off a smile. Hedwig seemed strangely satisfied with our reactions so he proceeded to changing the subject once more, telling us that we made noises in our sleep. Like that didn't make it creepier or something. Of course, how could a kid know why it was creepy to watch someone sleep. 

«Tell us.» Marcia urge him quietly and for a millisecond I thought she was referring to the noises we made. 'Well someone is not very concentrated' I mussed at myself when my own stupidity hit me, stopping myself from facepalming. 

«I'm not supposed to say.» He turned his head dramatically, like a cartoon, playing hard to get, refusing to spill the beans. He chuckled with his own joke, looking away. In less than a second he turned with the same excited smile and hinted us about it. «But. He has done awful things to people and he'll do awful things to you.» Before his sentence was over he added quickly. «I have blue socks too.» As if it was related to the subject. I looked back at my Passengers confused, met with expressions like mine, only more bothered.

«We're his food?» Marcia whispered terrified, and he shrugged, snorting with laughter. He clearly knew more than he was saying, but clearly enjoyed watching girls scared. Like all boys his age, I suppose. But then again what was his age? He sounded like an elementary school kid, his appearance never revealing anything critical.

«How old are you Hedwig?» I questioned curious, narrowing my eyes trying to guess.

«Nine.» He responded casually, his back straightening with pride, a wide smile on his face.

«So, you're not the guy that took us.» Casey jumped in, clearing up her thoughts. I turned at her half confused that she had just figure that out, but then I recalled she had no idea what it was like not recognizing these traits She was dealing with an D.I.D. patient.

«No? Pffs.» He laughed at her in questioning manner, like it seemed impossible to him for someone to confuse them with him, and wondered how one could ever. It made sense, he was a child, how could he understand completely that his body was not his own, and that to an outsider, all alters seemed the same. For us, the changes in behavior and body seemed huge.

After all this years I had learned to notice the difference in the mirror. Practicing in front of it I could never miss the change in my posture when Carol or Carlos took the Wheel. The way my back straightened, and my shoulders pulled back with confidence was impossible for me to miss. The eye color that darkened when the Twins drove, and lightened when Carol did. And so many more, some of which I couldn't even name.

No, it wasn't the same. Everything changed depending on the alter that was on the surface. You just had to know where to look. I knew that, he knew that. But no one else in the room did. Which was still strange. His alters even changed cloths to feel more comfortable in their body, their behavior changed dramatically. Why did they doubted still that there were different people in there?

«And you're not the lady.» She said, half questioning. And once again Hedwig responded with the same clueless naive expression.

«What are you, blind?» He laughed at her, but Casey was too taken, by the fact she was dealing with someone harmless, to notice. 'Yeah, Casey, the lady wore a skirt!' I wanted to tell her in a mocking irony but I kept my mouth shut for obvious reasons.

«You.. don't know how they think.» It finally dawned on her but then it also hit me. He was so innocent, the nature of his guardians' hardly affecting him. He was easy to manipulate. Something bitter filled my mouth. I wanted to. I wanted to use him to get out too. I was a horrible person for even thinking it but I couldn't help but suddenly miss the child and see a possible way out. I did my best to shake it out of my head but it still remained there. Like thorn stuck in my thoughts. 

«N-No.. They don't tell me much...» He stuttered uncomfortable. «I just ate a hot-dog!» He added out of the blue, not sure if he was avoiding the conversation or he just got easily distracted by stray thoughts. What was that disorder that did that? 

«Hedwig...How many friends do you have?» I interrupted Casey, taking control of the situation the best way I could at the moment. I didn't know what I planned on doing. I didn't want to use him. I didn't want to use anyone for any purpose. I had stopped Casey from talking because I knew her moral compass was misguided by her fear. But still I was unsure as to where my moral compass pointed to. Or if I should be concerned that my survival instincts didn’t overpower it. I followed it regardless.

«I... have mister Dennis and Miss Patricia... Barry is nice sometimes.» He stuttered, frowning, thinking hard of who could be called his friend. I took the liberty to assume Patricia was the woman, and Dennis the man that followed us. Perhaps Barry was the host. Either way, it was one alter up, four in total plus Hedwig. 

«Aren't there any other children with you? O-or close to your age?» I asked, trying to find a way not to look too suspicious about the question I wanted to make. He looked gloomy, like he had just realized he didn't have much friends, and my heart broke knowing I had just planted that thought. 

«N-No... It's mostly grown ups, and Jade but she's mean to me. » He said, thoughtfully

«How many are there? In total?» I finally grasped the chance to ask and oh so innocently, he replied honestly, providing an answer.

«Grown ups? Umm... Twenty three? I think. Your hair are weird.»The number took me by surprise, I didn't really expect such a number, even though Dr Fletcher had once mentioned that the number can go over a hundred. Still, compared to my three Passengers it was amazing. Although lord knew what he had been through to have so many.

« You like the color?» I asked, trying not to neglect his opinions and the things he voiced. I pulled my braid in front of me and started to untangle the hair, letting him see the colors clearly. «Twenty three people?» I checked once more and he nodded.

«Yeah... Twenty four actually but he doesn't have chair.» He confirmed, scratching his head. It seemed like he tried to play with his own hair but then realized he hadn't any. Next to me Caroline took a sharp breath, and I felt confidence building up. We had gotten this far, we were getting answers and I couldn't find reason to stop now."Coraline Clacher you are brilliant!" She whispered and kissed my cheek, smiling widely, kneeling by my side.

«A throne?» I suggested, and he shook his head, his eyes lightening up at the idea.

«N-No. But I'll tell Miss Patricia to make him one!» He exclaimed thrilled by the idea, I could almost see his ideas flashing in front of his eyes, a hint of pride creeping into his face. He clearly craved his guardian 's praising. 

«How about we are your friends while we are here?» I suggested and once again I watched his eyes fill with happiness. Overjoyed he nodded and flashed me his teeth.

«Sure! Do you like dancing?»He asked excited and I had to remind myself not to let my smile drop, as the similar question 'Dennis' had asked, popped into my mind. Two out of three alters liked dancing so far. Had the host interest in it too?

«I.. like watching... My leg is hurt you see.» I saw him my bandaged leg but he didn't seem to care as he gave another goofy smile. In my mind popped an image of a small boy with a missing tooth and a brown locks and I decided that's what he'd look like in real life.

«I'll show you! It's easy!» He exclaimed and I could only smiled back at him. "Can I hug him?" I turned desperately to Caroline who smiled kindly, and shook her head. 

"Maybe later." She patted my shoulder reassuringly and I looked back at Carlos who was resting his leg on two seats, his body against the windows. He had also calmed down, lying there playing a game on his phone, without worrying at all. Looking around I was surprised to see that my, hypocritical, Passengers, were absolutely cool about the kid and didn't feel threatened at all.

"Since when do you have such a soft spot for children?" Carlotta questioned from a couple seats away. She seemed sincerely confused by this but I wasn't sure why. 

"Since always?" Carlos responded for me, not tearing his eyes from the game. It was no secret, I had my mother as an idol. She always went on and on about how blessed she was to have me, and how much joy children brought to a woman. The one dream that never died. I studied to become a teacher, be near children. Yet Carlotta seemed puzzled by it, as if she had just realized it.

«Can you help us Hedwig?» Casey's voice pulled me from my internal conversations. His smile faded back into awkwardness as he frowned at her and stuttered once again. I gave Casey the same look. A bit too straightforward was she. I understood what she was doing but I also realized she underestimated his intelligence. She probably hadn't any siblings, or long termed contracts with children. It was a common mistake, to think that their age makes the somehow dumber. Usually it's the opposite, at that point of their life, they have the most creative thoughts, and the most smart ass answers. At that age they have no filters. They see the world the way it is.

«N-No...» He denied catching up immediately with what it was she wanted. «I-I'm not even supposed to be here. I stole the light from Mr Dennis but he'll be back real soon. I can't steal the light for too long or he'll know and he'll get angry. Etcetera....» He looked around, expecting some understanding but then suddenly decided to be off. He shot up grabbing the keys to close the door. «See ya.» He saluted, winking at me.

«Wait!» Casey called out and he paused before closing the door. «We heard something. We didn't understand it but...» She moved slowly, leaving the bed and sitting on floor. «Now we do.» She completed. I didn't know what she was talking about and I was pretty sure she didn't either. Still out of pure curiosity I let her continue, just to see what trick she was gonna pull. «Do you know what we heard?» She asked and he eyed around now curious too.

«What did you hear?» He asked and this time his voice was low and smooth, it almost resembled another alter, but the glimpse in his eye remained so I knew for a fact that Hedwig 'still had the light' as he put it. This tone of voice still send shivers down my spine. There had been occasions that I shared the Wheel with one of my Passengers, for example letting Carlos speak while I occupied myself with a book in real life. With this use of the Wheel multitasking was becoming ridiculously easy. So I couldn't help but worry, that someone else was listening.

«Come here. I'll whisper it to you.» Casey called out, and he seemed honestly intrigued and curious as he came closer, walking on his feet but still sitting with his knees hugged. Hedwig leaned closer to Casey who told him something that I couldn't make out. A protective worry took over. And Hedwigs reaction when he pulled away to look at her frowned didn't help.

«You are a big fibber. » He accused

«I never lie Hedwig.» Casey stated and distress too over his face.

«But-But Mr Dennis. He said that he followed those two girls for four days. And that. He knew. That they were the ones that-th-th-that he would want!.» He looked upset, at the verge of tears even. He stuttered with his words looking at me worried, almost begging to tell him it is a joke. I had no idea what Casey had told him, and how I could change her words without him losing trust on us, so I remained silent. Choosing to space out for a bit, I took my hands off the Wheel and turned to my Passengers. 

“He stalked them." I pointed out, not sure how his original plans affected us at all. He planned for two but taken four instead. That didn't mean he'd spare us. I turned to Caroline who was still knelt next to me watching the boy. "Do you think he's an alter? The one without a chair?" I questioned, referring to the person who was 'coming' for us.

"Alters are not supposed to be violent." She shook her head, but still not entirely sure.

"What am I then?" Carlotta asked taken aback, pointing at the knife at her hand. Caroline thought of it a bit but then shrugged it off, without an answer, at which Carlotta sat back with a satisfied smile on her lips. "Why did she thought there was only one?" 

"He said he'd separate you if you didn't behave." Carlos reminded. "She must have been the one to set that rule. She just assumed it was followed." He concluded, and we gave it no further thought for it didn't matter. 

«They talk about how he wants a boy this time. They are going to give him you.» I heard Casey tell him and not having more of the brainwashing I raised my hands to drive again. To put a stop to her lies, even though there was a tiny possibility they might help us escape. 

"Don't." Caroline stopped me, grabbing my hands pushing them to my chest, away from the wheel. "You tried to be friendly, let her attempt to push him." She advised and I stared at her in shock. Of all people, Carol was the last one I expected to take this kind of bullshit. She knew why I took this personally, yet she stopped me from putting an end to it.

"Carol, he's a child and she's scaring him!" I exclaimed, not believing her cold stance. “What does she think anyway? She’s going to turn a kid against his guardian?” I turned my attention back to the conversation, Hedwig now with a pained expression on his face.

«Ms Patricia... She thinks I umm... She thinks I'm stupid...She thinks I make silly mistakes...» He told us broken hearted, a tear slipping down his cheek. Something stirred in me. I couldn't get more of this. We were deceiving a harmless child. What kind of people were we? What made me, when I watched it happen and did nothing? We would lose ourselves in the process of this.

"That's it." I pulled my hands from Carol's violently and grabbed the Wheel.

"Just wait." She attempted once more but I didn't listen. I did though listen to Carlos who exploded and yelled at me in anger.

"He's a child. Do you think he will be at all moved by an adult's betrayal?" His voice filled the Bus and I froze, hands slipping away from the Wheel. "One toy and he'll forget it. That's what children are like!" I had never seen him angry, not at me. And suddenly I wondered if I should block him out because his angry tone panicked me."You were like that too once. Remember?"My stomach dropped like it was full of stones. Was I? Am I not still? Have I change so much, I wondered. Was there a time I would do such thing? Forgive him for a gift? I forgave him, yes, but it had only been for my own inner piece and nothing more. I turned to Carlos, brown eyes locking with his black ones. When was I ever a shallow child that got bribed to sit and keep quiet? I kept quiet anyway, no bribes needed.  _Good girl. I was a good girl._

"Yes Carlos I do remember. Do you remember where we ended up after that?" I whispered, tearing my eyes to look away. I knew he got what I was saying, he couldn’t possibly forget the way we lived after he and Carlotta were created. What Carol had told them for before too. I reached for the Wheel and drove on. I had missed a great deal apparently because when I came back into consciousness Hedwig was ready to depart.

«W-Wait a minute.» He said, his face serious. He pulled away and shook his head as if he broke out of a spell and realized what was happening. «It took forever to get this place safe without the nosy bodies that work here finding out. You can't get out of here!» He raised his voice, slightly panicked and then turned and walked out saying; «I have to blow my nose.»

«No, wait!» I called out but it was too late, he had closed the door behind him, leaving the girls more terrified than ever, and me feeling guilty for my lack of actions. I blocked out my Passengers, not caring of their intentions at the moment. I wanted to drive alone for a while. Funny if you think, I wasn't mad at Casey, I understood she did it to find a way out. But my Passengers. I thought they were more selfless than that. Or maybe I was too selfless for my own good. 

«Who's coming?» Marcia trembled. Claire on her feet, walking around the room frantic. Her moves nervous and sharp as she strangled to find something comforting in the situation. «This is seriously scary.»

«No one's coming.» Claire turned to her, her hands flying up in a panic. Even she didn't believe her words and any idiot could tell.

«He said something.» Casey said, voice low, as she walked on the wall that separated the bathroom from the room. «He said something about making the room safe.» She pointed out touching the wall and sliding her hands on it. «This is all new drywall. What was unsafe?» She asked breathless. Nothing else needed to be said. I jumped off the bed, leg aching but I hardly cared. Marcia entered the bathroom. We all started bang the walls around, not sure what we were looking for but still looking for it. Claire pulled a bed in the middle of the room and climbed on it, on her toes, hitting the thankfully not too high, ceiling. And then, between all the sounds of fists against walls, a deep empty one boomed, and we all fell silent.


	8. Chapter 8

**Coraline**   
A long pause followed, we didn't even dare to breath. Claire was the first to move, she climbed down of the bed and grabbed one of her heels, climbing back on, raising her hand with the heel, ready to strike. I held my breath. 

«Wait. Wait, are we sure about this?» Casey stopped her. Hesitating Claire looked down to us, but apparently she decided that it was worth the risk, looked back up and started digging the paper ceiling. I released the breath I held. There was no turning back, and God help us if we didn't manage to get through with this. Casey ran to the door, watching out in case he returned, I limped to her side, peeked out, occasionally turning to see if Claire had made progress. 

«Casey, you were right. There's something here.» She exclaimed after a while and we turned to see. Above her head, on the torn paper ceiling there was a hole, revealing a closed iron vent. An airway. She kept stabbing and digging the paper maniacally. «He was covering up a way out. Tell me if you see him.» She called out. Heart beating widely I turned my attention back to the closed door. The last things between him preventing our escape. A door, and a few desperate girls.

'We should have waited' I thought 'How long until he comes back? And what then?'

«Casey, tell us what you see.» Marcia asked and Casey quickly glanced behind her, just as I saw the outside door open, Hedwig entering, looking confused towards the room on which we were. My stomach sank.  _'Going somewhere lass? Your papa will be here soon. Fancy a game until then?' Why didn't I run? You couldn't have known._

«He's here.» I whispered, terror washing over me. Casey turned sharply towards the door, leaning over me, to see through the crack. Hedwig was looking towards us but instead walked on some other side of the room. I had no illusion he wouldn't come back, and judging by how Casey's guard remained high, neither did she. Still she backed away.

«You can't let him in! You can't let him in! This is our one chance.» Claire told us, voice low but tone panicked. I didn't turn to look at them, I didn't make a sound. 

«We're not gonna make it.» Casey told them but Claire was having non of it. She kept tearing the papers, her life literally depending on it. Ours too. I turned to look her progress, which wasn't much. Every second felt like eternity.

«Yes, we are!»She insisted, not backing down. I recognized her tone, her face. She was filled with hope. Blissful, heartwarming hope. In her mind she was winning, maybe had already won. My heart broke. This certainty would be her breakdown, if we failed. Marcia joined in, leaning above me, holding the door. 

«Hey, what are you guys doing?» Hegwig questioned from outside, and I pierced my lips together. I never dealt well with guilt and knowing I had remained silent while a kid was being fed lies wasn't a very pleasant sensation. Somewhere in the chaos of thoughts and fears I heard the keys, the door unlocking. I wondered if I should unblock my Passengers, let them take control, save me from this paralyzing sensation of helplessness. But my ego wouldn't let me. For some stupid reason, it yelled at me, I had to prove I wasn't helpless, I could handle my own fear. Casey returned to the door, determined, desperate and everything in between. 

Hedwig naively, thought we were pranking him. Laughing awkwardly and asking us to stop it, pushed once or twice, we pushed the door closed again. «Give us a second. We're changing.» Marcia told him but Hedwig didn't buy it.

«What are you guys doing? Let me in.» He repeated, pushing the door, Marcia, Casey and me holding it from the other side. The door moved slightly and closed once again under our weight. A memory flashed from the back of my mind, one of the first times we went to the gym. How I could lift less when driving, than Carlos or Carlotta. It didn't make sense, we had the same body, but somehow, they were stronger than I. Assuming it was the same for Hedwig and the rest of the alters, I prayed Dennis wouldn't come out anytime soon. 

He insisted to yelling at us to open up, but we kept him out, pushing with all our will. Truth be told, at that point we no longer had a choice, it was either take it or leave it. Our last chance of getting out, because if he broke in before Claire managed to escape, they'd separate us and we'd have even less chances. Outside Hedwig was rapid. Something among the lines 'You're being bitches!' reached my ears and I thought to myself, that he wasn't nice as I thought. Still, it was hard to blame a nine year old, even for bad language, which he had probably picked up from someone else. A swear jar was a nice idea.

Turning at Claire once more, I saw the last pieces of paper hit the ground, the vent following right after. «Just give me as much time as you can.» She said, reaching up with her hands and jumping up. Like expected she didn't manage to hold on the first time but she kept on trying. Hedwig complained outside, pushing again and again. Hoping they could hold him out, I tore away from the door, and limped to Claire, she looked down at me and then at the door worried that the girls wouldn't keep him out without me.

«Come on! I'll push you up.» I told her, stepping on the bed and bending my knees to grab her legs. I couldn't climb instead of her, she could hardly reach the ceiling and I was a half a head shorter than her. I had no chance. She sighed relieved as I exhaled from my mouth, pushing her up, my legs burying in the mattress. It all happened in seconds. Just as she found somewhere to hold on, a jolt of pain stroke my leg and I lost balance. As I fell back I watched her disappear up the airway. And then I hit the floor, head first. Thankfully, I blacked out immediately. I wouldn't want to face the consequences of our actions.

{...}

The Bus broke down, engine turning off on its own. It stopped on the middle of the road, even though I hadn't hit the breaks. I fell back on my seat, grabbing my head. The hit had left me dizzy. Immediately I unblocked the Passengers, forgetting why I was ever mad at them. 'Such a hypocrite' I thought 'I don't wanna die but I don't truly try to get out. Putting morals in the game, like they matter to anyone and then wondering why I screwed up.'

"What the fuck happened?" Carlotta questioned, disoriented as the block lifted. 

"We found a way out." I simply stated opening the doors and walking out to get some air. Carlos' heavy footsteps following close behind as I stepped out and sat in the asphalt. I grabbed my head and exhaled. Real world was such a mess. Why did I insist in going back out there?

"Are you alright?" Carlos asked, not sitting beside me. I strangled to find an answer other than 'no' but failing miserably. So I kept silent. I looked away, into the endless fields of puppies that lied in front of me. Down, in the distance, I could always see the Farm, that seemed to follow us, no matter the turns we took. I could hardly tell anymore whether we drove in circles or in a never-ending straight line.

"Hey." His hand rested on my shoulder, comforting and heavy. I heard the sound of his jacket sliding down the Bus' surface as he sat next to me. "Coral... Talk to me, love." 

"There was a hidden airway in the ceiling. I helped Claire climb out, I fell, hit my head."

"Are you okay?" There was no worry in his voice, a casual question, that somehow demanded an honest answer. Maybe it was just Carlos, I could never hide things from him, so maybe it was him, or perhaps me. Who knew?

"You would have realized if I had died I think." I answered bitterly. I tried not to let my mind wonder what would happen to the Mindscape if I did die. But I couldn't help the question and the possible scenarios. In my favorite, we'd be trapped here forever, in my pretty fields of poppies and the Farm, the Underground and an open road to explore memories.

"Coral, don't avoid the question." His tone was firm, like a father speaking to a child. In every other situation, it would had been comforting. Not this time. 

"I'm fine."  _You lying bitch._

"Are we back on this again?" He sighed exhausted. I only looked down, not daring to look at him. 

"Carlos, honestly." I was overwhelmed. Tired, and too prideful to let it stop me from controlling the situation and Driving. Yet lies seemed easy to come out of my mouth.

"No." He cut me "I don't judge you for feeling pressured Coral." He reminded me and I smiled sadly, tears stinging in my eyes. "But you have to understand. There will always be crossfire victims. And sometimes they are children." He continued. I disliked this point of view. This idea that someone innocent had to be hurt for us to survive. I knew I couldn't save everyone, but I had to try. And first in my list, top priority would always be misunderstood and hurt people, like the host of the guy that kidnapped us, like Hedwig, like Casey. 

"You sound like it's me or them." I didn't like it. I didn't like this war mentality in which he was trapped into. This idea of good and bad. This unfair world on which we all hurt, and hurt others. Carlos might had been raised in that world, but now he was in here, with me. When he and his sister arrived, they changed their names, Matthew and Mary vanished, started anew. They swore to help, to protect, even if they never truly said it out loud. Apparently, we all still strangled to face the change. To accept that the war zone outside, didn't necessarily affected us. 

"It is." He stated with certainty, a hint of sadness, recognition of the unfairness of the world. I could no longer hold back my poison, my complain and pain. It had been bothering me for so long, and this situation seemed to open up closed wounds. It was unfair for Carlos to take the blame, to be attacked like that when he only tried to help.

"And it justifies my actions?" I tested my waters, preparing to tell him something he didn't want to hear. If I knew his reaction earlier I wouldn't have talked. Or maybe I would have. Perhaps I didn't care, perhaps I wanted to hear it. Perhaps I wanted to be attacked and since our kidnapper held back, I poisoned myself without reason.

"Yes, it does, love." He reassured, assuming I want to let go of a sin, a guilt. Little did he know I was ready to start a fight. Telepathy didn't work on time, for him to back off earlier. How selective of it, to work only when I didn't spoke to him. 

"Then it justifies his, too" I concluded out loud with more certainty than I had ever heard on my voice. Carlos went still by my side. I didn't turn to look at him. I could already see his expressions, shifting between disappointment, pain, anger, and impossibly deep sadness. Had I turned my head, I would have regretted my words immediately, I would have apologized and explain myself. But looking away, kept me honest enough to start this conversation.

"Nothing justifies your father's actions, Coral." He said, voice dangerously low, no emotion in it. Flat tone and cold as ice as he denied and anything defensive about my father. It didn't affected me at all. ”It wasn’t you or him. It was a very clear choice and he chose to d what he did.”

"He was drunk." I insisted. "He fought with mom. I was caught in the crossfire." I explained and Carlos let a humorless laugh.

"Do you still believe that?" He asked me, knowing that I didn't. It was my father's side of that night. It made no sense. I could see it now. Even so, I used it, telling it out loud to people, even after five years, because he had told me to do so. Because I had feared him and loved him enough to blindly defend him. It was after all these years I finally realized that the habit of repeating the lies was hard to quit.

"...No. But I want to." I admitted. The awful truth finally out, burning my tongue and wrecking my mind. I had never known, never realized, how much I wanted to believe the lie that proved my father innocent. How much I wanted things to go back to the days I was unaware I had been so codependent on him and mom. To the days that preferring abuse over being alone was not bad, but good. Now the truth was out. I knew, that everything in my life was bad, and I refused to face it. 

"Did it made you feel better? Believing that?" He questioned, still cold, still emotionless. He was offended on a personal level. He held back anger. All of my Alters did. But unlike others, they cared enough to hide and bury it so I would heal. But this time, this time I practically asked for it.

"I feel like I am sinning. Like telling the truth will get me punished again." I felt like a child as I wimped and hugged my legs closer admitting my feelings. It was the worst timing to do so. But then again, how could I hide the truth when I had just realized it, how could I hide it and not share it?

“He is dead. And you are not alone.”

“I feel alone...”

"Sometimes I don't know if I should be offended that you have us and Sofia and still feel alone..." The words were like a slap on my face. I was surprised by his reaction and I shouldn't be. "Sometimes I think I should have let you drive through one of these times he had you pinned down and raped you." He let a laugh, half air half voice. Truly, cruelly amused. Something in me just went cold hearing those words. "Just one. Just one time, for you to see that no matter how much you'd scream, beg or cry, you'd still be alone."

I don't think I had absolutely understood the meaning of his words but then again when it finally sank and I turned to look at him, more surprised by the loads of honesty than the cruel nature of it, I lost my words. ‘That’ I though, ‘is my punishment.’ Because it was a punishment. I should have known better than to express myself like that to them. I already knew I was not a good person, that I was a dirty, lying whore. I should had known better than that. Better than to assume I would get away with it. Carlotta had left the Bus, she stood further away, frozen in place, chest still, breath held back. I forgot Carlos' words, any idea of anger towards him. Immediately I realized he was deeper in shit than I was for what I had said.

"What the fuck Carlos?" Carlotta exploded. Carlos' angered expression falling in one of terror. I felt sorry for him. Carlotta was coming towards us with big steps, furious hardly describing her. Carlos shot up and I followed slowly. Carlotta screamed at him, at the top of her lungs, despite the shortness of the distance. "WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT?!"

"It's alright Carlotta." I reassured her, trying to get in the middle, but stoping myself. I was truly not too hurt by his words because I had told myself the same things with different words. It was no lie, I was being ungrateful, acting like they held no value to me. They did. I simply missed the lies. Judge me all you want. Some of you, know, it is hard to face the truth. If you don't know this kind of pain, you're weak. You haven't seen your life being torn apart. You haven't had this kind of pain that humiliates you and brings you on your knees. You haven't faced the truth you refuse to admit.

"The fucking hell it is!" She hissed, looking positively murderous. No one saw it coming, not even Carlos, but Carlotta punched him, her fist meeting face in a hook side punch. Not giving him any time to find his feet, she grabbed her brother by the collar of his shirt and pushed him violently farther away, angrily barking at me. "Get inside, girly." 

I did as I was told. I knew better than to disagree with Carlotta at this stage. Though her anger was always short in time. She would release it, not caring about the consequences and then relax enough to hear them out. Only knowing Carlos' ego, he wouldn't bother explaining. I heard her yell, curse and whisper outside, but I waited inside the Bus as instructed. Soon Carlotta came in, boiling 

"Where is he?" I questioned when I didn't see him coming in, and looking through the windows he was nowhere to be seen.

"To the Farm. If he is gonna be a bitch then at least he can keep away." Was her answer. Quiet and murmuring curses she swiped drops of sweat from her forehead.

"Carlotta..." I tried to warn, to calm her.

"We are supposed to protect you. Not judge you. Not attack you." She snapped, her voice raising dangerously. Instantly realizing her mistake she closed her mouth, exhaled from her nose, calming down. "He made an attack. He stays away." She announced, passively aggressively pointing towards the house on the distance her tone leaving no space for discussion. I tried anyway.

"No, he made a point." I argued. Taking his side because I couldn't deny that I had been acting stupid. Damn, I even knew I was gonna act stupid before starting talking. "And you can't deny, he is partly right."

"If it was a chore to protect you from that bastard, he could have let me. You owe non of us anything." She insisted more calmly this time. Obviously not very confident when her anger didn't disguised her feelings. "You are supposed to feel safe in here." There was something desperate in her voice, something broken that stung because I knew that they were ALL trying to help, and I only made things hard, putting morals and pride in the game that was already hard for them. Feeling threatened by the affection I returned to my shield's up attitude, making Carlotta go back to dangerous bitch mode.

"Why am I the only one here in need of safety?" I folded my arms on my chest and demanded an answer, not actually offended by the fact they cared, but just closing myself up, changing the conversation at a topic they were bad and not perfectly kind and patient with all my insecurities. It worked. She didn't realize, she followed along, huffing annoyed and give me a 'really now?' face.

"Is this about the kid?" She asked and I smiled as if I had already won this argument. Because even if this was an argument I would have won anyway. But this wasn't but fake anger to distract her (successfully) from the real problem, so still, I had won, I had handled her, and the situation, making it out, without hearing what I didn't want to hear.

"I just don’t get why we can not talk and not lie, manipulate, or stab our way out."

I watched her pause, seeing my point and frowning defeatted. Then something glimmed in her eye. "Professor!" She called out out of nowhere, her head turning to the window outside of which Carol was smoking. She lazily looked up to her, and dropped her cigarette, sighing annoyed. She entered the Bus and looked at Carlotta with a bitchy face, waiting to hear what she wanted. "My brother had his shot, I'm skipping mine, try and convince her." She said and a long silence followed. 

I expected her to either refuse or turn to me and find all the reasons for which I was right, because god knew that she'd never do a favor to a person who just interrupted her smoking time. Instead, she walked up to the Wheel and turned the key, the Bus coming alive. Raising an eyebrow she closed the doors. Walking between me and Carlotta she reached the end of the Bus and sat comfortably, ignoring both of us. Carlotta pierced her lips, knowing there was nothing she could say and sat at the nearest seat.

With limited choices now, I settled at the Driver's seat and started driving.

{...}

«Sleeping beauty is up?» A strange voice questioned, and I turned to look towards the familiar face, with the unfamiliar eyes. It wasn't Hedwig's shining sea-colored eyes, it wasn't Dennis' greyish blue. This time they were darker, like blue contacts above brown iris'. The voice that had woken me was female but it lacked the British accent of Patricia. 

«Who are you?» I asked pulling away and she raised her eyebrows shocked with a hint of panic. She was an alter, the fourth I had encountered so far. Twenty to go. She was dressed with Dennis' clothes, possibly had taken control without him noticing. A similar worry with before took over, my muscles tensing at the idea of punishment I would possibly receive, Patricia's promise of safety forgotten in my mind.

«Fuck, you don't recall my face?» She pointed her head and looked at me. A worried expression on her face as she impatiently awaited for an answer. There was nothing scary about her so far, unlike Patricia's cold and controlled nature. I glanced around quickly, I was on the 'laundry room' outside the room where we were held, sat on a stool, my back on a wall, leaning on it. The strange alter was seating on the small table by my side, a collection of chlorine bottles and antikal forgotten on it. 

«I know the face, but not you.» I answered after a while. She straightened her back, looking almost impressed. Had I not felt the same, when Sofia had first notice and questioned Carlotta's presence, I would wonder why the surprise. 

«You are sharp.» She commented, almost like admitting something dangerous.

«The changes are impossible to miss.» I pointed out, getting another surprised look. Her complexed and amused face as she tried to decipher something about me, to my surprise wasn't making me shift uncomfortable. She seemed harmless so far. Her questioning expression did no harm, truly.

«Many people would disagree.» She pouted her lips with complain. She looked strangely cute and natural as she pouted comically at the world's blindness. 

«What can I say, I am exceptional.» I shrugged humbly and she smiled. She moved away, opening the freezer and pulling out a bag of ice, passing it to me. For a moment I stared at it, comparing the pain of my head to the pain on my ankle. I settled with my freshly hit head and applied the cool ice, ignoring the sharp jolts that blackened my vision. How come these kind alters had murder on their future plans? 

«Your name?» She asked me after a while, making herself comfortable in a chair, sitting with her chest against the chair's back. She narrowed her eyes, almost like she was guessing names in her head, betting with herself, or with others. Though, Hedwig knew my name, but apparently hadn't told her. No wonder there, they kinda had an emergency, Claire escaping or so.

«Coraline.» 

«Like the movie?» I huffed, rolling my eyes. It wasn't the first time I had been asked that. I wasn't a big fan of Tim Burton's movies, yet I seemed to be confused with one. Once someone had even pointed out that I looked like the characters. 'Big head, bigger eyes and tiny body' she had said. To her defense, I used to be a living skeleton.

«Not the reason I was named that, but yes. That's how it's spelled.» I bit my lip, hearing footsteps in the Bus, Carlotta coming closer, but stopping and sitting silently at a seat, at an ideal distance. Not too close to make me feel trapped, but close enough to be by my side, should something happen. Part of me was grateful about it, another one judged me for being codependent on such care. The girl in front of me, bit her lip, in a playful manner that got me frowning, but also wondering. 

«I'm Jade.» She introduced and silently I recalled, Hedwig mentioning her. «How do you handle that hair?» Much like the nine year old, conversation seemed to fly around various subjects. My hair, never failing to be mentioned. 

«What's wrong with them?» I questioned taken aback, my fingers entangling in them, massaging my aching skull. I loved my hair. Mum had the same. The fiery color and the mermaid volume never failed to impress me as a child. I envied her long hair. As a teen I watched my darker shaded hair turn into wildfire and soon I could see my mother in the mirror more than myself. No wonder he could see it too.

«They are widely wavy.» She accused with a judging tone, like it was a problem. I gathered my hair on one side and hugged them protectively. Narrowing my eyes in defense and questioning.

«So?»

«So you should straighten them. You are already petite, they make you look smaller.» She said, like it was the most obvious thing in the world. At that I felt a laugh emerging from my chest. Here I was taking hair advises from my kidnappers' alter, and honestly agreeing on topics with her. Because, she was right, the orange colored hair, were striking enough without the volume and length they had. 

«I'll keep it in mind. If I make it out alive.» I reassured her and thankfully she wasn't insulted by my reaction and just smiled amused.

«What you did was stupid. Truly motherfucking stupid.» She commented out of the blue and I gave her a confused look. Mentally a long list of stupid things me or the others had done recently unfolded and suddenly I realized that, had we kept our cool, we might had been out of here earlier. Still, I didn't agree immediately.

«Which part?» I asked after a while and she laughed out loud. She was easy to entertain, not very threatening and despite her cursing, kinda nice. Her expressions and arrogant behavior slightly reminded me of my early teens.

«Self awareness won't save your asses.» She commented, readjusting and shooting me a judging glare. «You should had sent someone smarter to run. Dennis caught the bitch in no time, locked her away.»

«I am honestly not surprised.» I shrugged coldly, disappointed but truly not surprised by Claire's incapability to find her way out even though she had the exit on her face. How hard could it be, to hide and later crawl in that airway until you found the end from which air entered? The guy wouldn't be able to follow her in that small space, he is huge, so she must had stepped out. Not very bright of her to do so and only excused from the panic she must had felt.

«I like you. And apparently so do the rest.» Jade commented, stretching her back, and that caught my interest. I understood Hedwig's naive nature, him thinking I was a friend. But Dennis and Patricia couldn't possibly favor me, or anyone else for that matter. Did that mean that other alter were watching? Were all of them part of whatever this was? «Even Patricia thought you're sweet, and she doesn't like anyone»

«If sweet was the word she used, you might want to consider it as literal.»

«Hell, I hope they keep you around.» She laughed and then looked away distracted and suddenly serious. «Gotta go.» Was all she said as I watched her strangle strangely. When she looked back up to me, Dennis had taken control again. He looked down at me serious and cold, scanning me head to toe. A pained, restricted expression taking over his face. 

«Take off your shirt.» He said, making my blood run cold. I didn't move. Looking into the faded blue eyes, trying to hide my terror. «Take it off, it's dirty.» He repeated annoyed when I didn't react and then it hit me. I had fallen on the dusty floor, my red sweater had white stains and he was obsessed with cleanliness. His pained expression wasn't because he was holding back sexual urges but because he was disgusted by the dirty piece of clothing. 

Trying not to press my luck, I placed the ice to the table and pulled the sweater over my head, turning it around, for him to touch the relatively clean side. I thanked all deities I knew, just in case I thanked the wrong one, for the chilly weather the day before, due to which I had wore an extra shirt. The warmth of the sweater left me, and I was left with a thin shirt that hardly provided heat, or cover. I extended my arm, offering the shirt. Hesitantly he took it, using but two fingers to carry it on the trash bin on the other side of the room.

As he turned his eyes wondered on my body, and awfully self consious I raised a hand to my neck and brought hair in front to hide as much of the exposed skin I could. As my cold hand found my neck, my fingers started unconsciously play with the cotton string from which my talisman hang. I had nearly forgotten it. This precious little piece of a jewelry, that weighted on my neck with meaning, had become so familiar to wear, that I forgot it even existed sometimes. Like a second nature, like a sixth sense so easy to ignore, so natural to have. 

«Your friend will be kept in another room. And you'll be next if you keep pulling such tricks.» He threatened, like it was something that should scare me more than my awaiting death. «You can't make fun of us, we are stronger than you think.» I could hardly believe my ears. Make fun of them? Was that what they feared? He had trapped, imprisoned us. Tricking Hedwig hadn't even been my doing, all I had done was keep silent, which wasn't my fault either, but that he needn't know. 

«Trying to stay alive has nothing to do with mockery.» _Shut up. Shut up. Shut the hell you fucking idiot. Don’t talk back. Don’t talk at all. Don’t make a sound._

«You have a sprained angle, you can't run away.» He reminded me, and I could help but bite my tongue. Did he honestly think I was gonna give up that easily? That I would just abandon every opportunity I could get, to save the others and myself, because of a few thinks in my way? He couldn't possibly be that foolish, so I simply assumed he attempted to make me feel more hopeless than I was.

«It doesn't stop me from trying.» I whispered and smiled to the floor, hiding my face with my hair, his face fell. In some twisted way, I saw myself in the person in front of me. And this feeling of goodwill, closeness, dare I say affection and care towards them, bothered me. I was aware I did it with everyone. I always justified actions, opinions, words. I even did with my father. I don't know if I was naive or foolishly hopeful or just understanding. I just couldn't find it in me to blame anyone. _But myself._

But I also understood that against common logic, I was defending the ones that arranged my death. Fooling myself, into believing there was a spark of humanity in them. A reason, a moral compass that told them it was wrong.«It's nothing personal, Dennis. In another world, we could have been friends.» I explained kindly. I watched as his face frowned and filled with something that reminded me of shame.  _You just can’t keep your mouth shut, can you?_

«Get in.» He growled, opening the door, pushing me in. The door closed and a while later, the other door closed and locked. And I was left alone with Marcia and Casey, Claire as foretold, nowhere to be seen.


	9. Chapter 9

I didn't speak to Marcia, Casey was asleep anyway, I went straight to the bathroom, closed the door and opened the faucet, leaned in, to drink the cool water. It felt good, actually it reminded me, I even had a stomach. A stomach that growled as soon as the mind recalled its existence. I ignored it, nothing to eat, and I didn't really care for food at the moment anyway. I leaned against the white door, staring at the mirror. The yellow bloom had fallen half dead, lied in the ceramic surface, its bright color fading into a dark gold shade. It's time was over.

I looked down at my watch, it ticked rhythmically, the hands moving in sharp tiny moves, telling me it was nearly seven o'clock. I had lost track of time. I wasn't sure whether we had been in here for days or hours. I tried to calculate but I had nothing to make out the time or the date. I turned to my biological clock. "Caroline what day is it?" I asked, turning my head towards her. She turned her head from the window, looking t me perplexed but answered immediately without thinking.

"March 9th." She told me and Carlotta turned sharply at her. Caroline had no watch but always knew the time. She sensed the minutes pass and counted them unconsciously. Despite the never-changing sky in the Mindscape, she always knew the day and date, Driving or not, closed in the Basement or out in the Farm. She  _always_ knew the time. "Nearly seven in the afternoon." She added accurate as always.

"It's been two days?!" Carlotta exclaimed with disbelief. The info was like a punch in the stomach, taking all breath out of me. I wasn't expecting that. I thought it had only been a couple of hours, save for the few hours of sleep, a day max.

"You were in the Farm for nearly 10 hours, Carlotta." Carol informed us casually. Since she knew the time, it hardly mattered to her how long it had been. For us it was different, time had been wasted, while it could had been used elsewhere. I was amazed by the speed it flew away like wind. Like there was a ticking bomb nearby. Ten hours. I had entered a single memory and somehow managed to get trapped in it. At least Caroline had been driving, or else, I'd had spent those hours looking like a catatonic

"I only visited one memory!" I exclaimed surprised by how what felt one hour max for me, had been ten hours in real life. Funny if you think, how easy it is to get lost in my own head for ten full hours while in the real world I counted the minutes through the day. 

"You know how tricky time is in those!" She told me, as if it was my fault and I should had been more careful. To my defense, I hadn't lost so much time since I had started my visits to Dr. Fletcher. Two days. Had the police made any progress? Was there any hope for them to break in here, save the day and take this man to a therapist, to help him be in peace? Was there any hope of a happy ending here? 

I thought I heard the door, open and close but I ignored it, he couldn't had possibly come back so soon. I mean, alright, I am a lovely company. But he left a minute ago. Carlotta had heard it too, her head ha turned to the Road, looking perplexed. I turned back to Driving, instantly finding myself, staring into the looking glass again. My reflexion stared back at me, she looked sad, tired, but she gave me a tight comforting smile, letting me know, we'd be okay.  _What a liar._ She had smiled to me like that many times, things got worse and worse anyway. He left, perhaps Hedwig took over again and came. I had to at least check, in case they wondered why I wasn't coming out. I released a long breath, calming out to prepare for whoever awaited behind that door.

I opened slowly, head out first, to see if I was wrong or not, the rest of my body following outside, but not releasing the door that helped me stand. Casey was freshly woken up, getting up, still sleepy. Judging by the light pink shawl, the heels and the skirt the large figure above her, was Patricia. Her head turned quickly towards me, a soft smile on her lips. «There you are, dear.» Her voice carried an unbearable sweetness that prevented me from returning the smile. Casey pushed herself up, pulling away from the intimate figure. 

«I heard you met Jade.» Patricia sighed as she placed a tray with food on the bed, in front of Casey. The sandwiches in the plates seemed more delicious than food had been for a long while. «I apologise on her behalf. The girl has a foul mouth.» She gave Casey a plate, with a sandwich, her moves fluid like a dance. Another plate was given to Marcia who watched the woman like she held a gun on her temple.

«It's alright, she was nice.» I reassured, not really caring for the girl's colorful vocabulary. Carlotta cursed like a sailor when she got upset, in comparison with Jade who simply expressed herself more aggressively. Patricia walked up to me, hips swaying, heels hitting the floor rhythmically. I tried not to pull away as she extended her hand and pushed away some stray hair that had fallen in front of my eyes.

«She mentioned you had really long hair. I must admit I hadn't realized when you had them tied.» She said softly, her hand stroking and petting my head. I was unsure of what to make of it, that gentle gesture of affection. So I allowed myself to enjoy it. Somewhere in my mind Patricia switched places with a redhead woman with green eyes who hummed strange lullabies. I didn't know I closed my eyes until the stroking stopped and I opened them. 

«Sit.» Patricia commanded firmly and unable to do anything else, I pushed away from the door and limped to the bed where Casey sat. Patricia took the tray away, giving me space to sit and the last sandwich. Casey moved next to Marcia and Patricia sat next to me. A brush appeared out of nowhere and Patricia started brushing my head, slowly and carefully, not pulling the mess of tangled waves too much. «Such wasted beauty...» I heard her murmur at one point, disappointment heavy in her voice. I pretended I didn't hear, that I didn't absolutely agree.

«Eat.» She commanded, and I looked down to my untouched food. I was so hungry, yet I couldn't bring myself to eat it. I brought it up to my mouth, took a bite and chew it. It was delicious, yet it felt foreign in my mouth at the moment. «It's good?» Patricia questioned, but I didn't answer. «It's got paprika in it.» She said, a bit of pride in her voice. A proud, creative chef, this woman was really based on a housewife's idea. 

The brushing stopped, and I felt her pull locks of hair, hooking them behind my ear. I felt her lean in, my heart skipped a beat, her hot breath fanning, my ear as she whispered. «I think I'll put a pretty flower in your hair. Just to show how important you are.» She brought the flower in front of me, the white flower spinning fragile, in the woman's fingers. «Pretty isn't it?» She asked, still so damn close, I couldn't breath. Something in my stomach twisted. I couldn't decide if I disliked or enjoyed the last of the distance between her chest and my back. Or her fingers on my chin as she turned my head away and placed the flower on my ear and tangled it in my hair. I felt my heart beat widely, the same speed as when I was afraid, but it didn't felt quite like it, and the unknown feeling terrified me even more. 

_Move away, she needs to move away. Or come closer. Lean in closer. Stop this burning on my skin. Anything in between I can not take._

Then she was gone, placing similar flowers to the others' hair. Reminding me I wasn’t anything special here. Marcia didn't even look up at her, only stared at me, terrified, begging me to do something, to take her away. The last bloom, possibly meant for Claire, remained in her hand, somehow it seemed less vulnerable than us at the moment. «Coraline, isn't it?» She smiled, sitting my side again. I turned my body towards her, wanting to keep eye contact. «What's your favorite flower, dear?»She questioned possibly attempting small talk and my head immediately turned to my red flowery fields.

«Poppies.» I said without any thinking, my answer so quick and certain it made her chuckle. 

«You love color red, don't you?» She taunted me and bit my tongue to prevent more words from slipping. From the rear view mirror I could see the curious glances of Carol and Carlotta, they didn't look worried, just amused. The fact they didn't intervene at that somehow crucial point built up confidence so I kept going, choosing my words more carefully.

«There is a thin line between love and hate, miss.» I said softly, her smile fading into a softer one, almost a sad one. 

She wasn't wrong. I was surrounded my red colors, they had marked my entire life. My Mindscape was dripping red, in various shades of it. Starting from deep crimson red like blood, all the way to light red-orange mixes. The sky had this color of the sunset, that kept everything under a crimson and golden light, it never changed. The Farm had red walls, and white details around the windows, the Bus was red, the soil on the road was red, my fields were full of red flowers. My talisman was a branch of a red coral, my hair were fiery in color just like mom's. Mom's cheeks and eyes turned red when she cried the morning after what happened. Mom's blood was red that night before the police came too. My blood was red too. There was so much blood. So much red. God. How I hate the color red.

«There is, isn't there?» She asked rhetorically, only it felt like she spoke to herself this time. She got lost for a moment, her thoughts traveling elsewhere, her eyes falling lower as she drifted away briefly. Then she was back, her hand leaving my hair, traveling down my chest and taking my talisman in. «What a strange necklace.» She murmured bringing it up, closer to her eyes. 

«It's a talisman, miss.» I said voice low, a small secret that if I died, wouldn't die with me.

«Is it? What for?» She asked, pure curiosity in her voice, her eyes darting in mine. Tyrquaz eyes, bright with intelligence. I swallowed and looked down to the little branch. Mom had explained it to me once. I was a child then, by all means pure, but even then I knew it didn't work. Not for lack of belief, but of clear facts. It wasn't hard to tell.

«Protection.» I responded eventually, the words soft, nearly a whisper. «Somewhere in Greece, they hang coral branches above children's beds, to protect them from harm or illness.» I didn't even remember mom telling me this. It had been a part of my life, of my existence since I could remember myself. The cotton string and the red branch hanging around my neck had never been removed. 

«Does it work?» Her eyes sparked, like a child finding a toy, learning about magic. I smiled at her enthusiasm, but shook my head, because truth be told, I hadn't been protected by either harm or illness in my life.

«Not for me.» I answered honestly, smiling sadly.

«Matches your name, though.» She commented, releasing it, letting it hit my chest once more. I raised an eyebrow, impressed by how she had noticed that, most people didn't automatically link the two. But it was true, like the talisman, the name was supposed to help me and protect me. The best intentions anyone could have had when naming a child, yet the biggest irony throughout my life.

«I was named after it, miss.» I explained, and her eyes shone again, with victory and joy. She looked pleasantly impressed at the information and I couldn't help but smile about how easy was taken by such facts. 

«How symbolic.»She murmured her eyes darting down at it. «What is Jade used for?» She questioned. I frowned trying to remember, I could have not known, but to her strange luck, I had happened to be reading about gemstones and their properties two days before, at Claire's birthday party. I bit my lip, stray sentences coming back to me.

«Um... It's a symbol of serenity and purity. A very spiritual gemstone.» I shrugged, not really remembering anything important. The book had happens to have incredible detail, stories and properties of the gemstones unfolding like eons old spiritual history. I had never known myself to be spiritual, to believe in the supernatural, but the world never seized to surprise me. «I don't know about Greece, but in China it was worth more than diamonds. Some say it cures illnesses.»

«Well, that sounds nothing like her.» She laughed. «Jade has type-2 diabetes, and there is nothing pure about that girl.»

«Sounds like something she needs, though, doesn't it?» I pointed out and she shook her head, chuckling. She didn't answer, her belief gone, instead she turned to Marcia who flinched at the woman's restless glare. She shook her head sharply, Patricia's eyes narrowing, she knew that wasn't true. She could always just pick a random flower, continue the conversation, but she was so frightened, she refused to bother. She didn't know who human interaction could help, could save. Even the smallest of things.

«And you?» Patricia turned to Casey. She looked intimidated but not scared, it made Patricia smirk satisfied. «Do you have a favorite flower?» Casey gave it some thought, frowning, and thinking, but eventually shrugged. «You neither?» Patricia asked a note of disappointment in her voice. «No? Such a shame.» She tsked and sighed, getting up. She pulled her shawl, covering herself better and picked up the tray and the brush that had been left in my bed. «Come along now. We'll have a proper meal.» She said, walking to the door and unlocking it.

The girls exchanged unsure glances but I only straggled to get up an limp a bit closer to the door without looking like a kid jumping around. Marcia rushed to my side, attempting to keep me up, allowing me to let some weight on her. Patricia looked down at me. «That's gonna be a problem, isn't it?»

«I can stay here, I'm not hungry.» I rushed to offer. 

«Nonsense. Tell you what. I'll get the girls first. Then you can come and keep me company while I'll cook dinner. You can tell me more about stones. Yeah?»Her tone was hardly one that gave me choice so I simply nodded, giving her a tight smile. She seemed satisfied with that, she smiled back, more arrogantly. Marcia helped me back to the bed and Patricia sang. «Come along now.» Casey stood up, getting Marcia's free hand after passing her, her plate, pulling her outside.

As soon as the door closed I held my breath, waiting to hear the outside door close, releasing it immediately after. I took my hands of the wheel, letting out an exhausted groan. Sofia could be reasoned with, Patricia would have it her way no matter what, that much was clear. She now looked less like Sofia and more like my previous foster mom, all church and good manners. Obviously though, she she was less of a gossip and more of a secret lady. Raised with class. 

"Coral, dear." Carol started, her British accent so similar with Patricia's, for a minute I thought she was mocking her. "I am honestly worried about how familiar you have grown with those people."

"Innocent until proven guilty?" I tried to claim, but I did an awful job at convincing anyone, I didn't even believe myself. I knew I was shitting her, trying to justify my actions and emotional state.

"Good people until they actually try and kill you and not simply plan it?" Carlotta offered mockingly and I sank in the Driver's seat, trying to disappear. Here came the talk. And here I was, avoiding it like the teenager I was.

"Do you even want to get out? Or do you have the illusion you can befriend them and somehow convince them to let you go?" She asked tense, almost panicked as she realized that I might not really taking seriously the situation. In my opinion I did, but somehow I was still not as afraid as she was. Death didn't feel so scary, it was definitely present but not enough to paralyze my soul.

"They will kill you."

"I know."

"Do you want to die?" Carol snapped at me and I opened my mouth to say no. Only I stopped, and thought about it for a second longer. All my actions had nothing to do with my survival, only with my morals. Only with my broken little pieces and the man that I had something in common with. How funny. It seemed I had developed a mix of Stocholm Syndrome and a crush, a drop of "I would die for you." romance lines.

"I don't know." I answered honestly, because if I said no, my actions would make me liar. "I don't think so." I added.

"What about the girls? Hmm?" She questioned aggressively. I was only glad she wasn't using full on rage, because if we reached that point, I'd giver her the Wheel and go to the Farm. "If you don't find a way out, they will all die." 

"I know." Like I needed a reminder. Carlotta's face fell and gloomed.

"Can you live with that?" She asked taken aback. I immediately bit my tongue. Death had always been a fragile topic with my Passengers, but with the Twins it was like walking in eggshells. They'd break no matter what. Carlos' experience with war, and Carlotta's with mafia member's had marked their lives. I didn't know Carlotta's relation with death. But obviously she had walked by his side a few times.

"I..." I straggled to find an answer that wouldn't disappoint her, shock her, anger her. But I only ended up being as kindly honest one could be here. "I don't think it matters." I told them, and they both fell quiet. When I looked up, they looked at me like I was crazy, which I probably sounded like. "I know, it's so cold of me, so heartless. But truth is, I am useless. I can't run, I can't help. I can't prevent them from being stupid, it's like I don't exist!" 

I took a deep breath, I hadn't realized I was yelling until I stopped and felt my throat ache. I laughed coldly, looking up to them, looking certain of myself, even if I felt nothing like it. "There is no team here. If I am to save someone, I'll save myself. And I'll do it without lies or manipulating children. Then, like you said, I'll go to the police and hope I am not too late."

"And if you are?" 

"I will deal with it when it happens." I hated how cold I sounded, how fearful and proud. But if I wouldn't pretend to care, I wouldn't pretend to feel guilty for something I knew I couldn't help. Not without hurting someone who had obviously been hurt in the past, and taking two dozen's people down with him. So I refused to make a choice, between my values and my life. It didn't have to do with the girls, or with the man and their choices. It only had to do with me, not wanting to lose my values when I had just started finding them.

"You are your mother's daughter, aren't you?" Carol mocked me, a humorous laugh leaving her lips. I looked up to her. She had never brought my mother as an argument or an insult before. But I guess I had asked for it when I brought her up. "You think you are invincible. Full of hope and patience, people get hurt, you get hurt but still you try and be good." She through her hands up, giving up. But as she walked down to the back seats she turned and gave me a last sad glance. "Let's hope heaven exists, Coraline. That's the only place this stupidity is going to be appreciated."

I pierced my lips together, preventing any voice from coming out because I knew this wasn't a fight I could ever win. Deep down I knew she was right. I  _wanted_ to be like my mom. I didn't say I didn't want to get out. I just wanted it to happen under circumstances that benefited everyone. I didn't want to be like my father. I wanted to be like my selfless mother who stayed with a broken man and hoped for the best. I wanted the happy ending, my mother couldn't have. And I was selfish enough to risk other lives to get it. Not that I'd ever admit it. It was much later on I realized the true reason's behind my actions.

I turned the Bus music on, and rested on the Driver's seat. Knowing that there was nothing left to say between us. So I remained silent, lied on the bed looking at the closed escape route Claire had taken. 'What would I had done if she had made it out? If the police got in here. And this all was over. How would I feel then?' I wondered and I came to realize, I happened to enjoy being away. Away from the loving and secure routine in Sofia's home. Somehow, being threatened felt more familiar that pretty room I slept in, and Sofia's overprotective nature.

Out of the blue, the door burst open, Casey walking in, clearly upset. I shot up, Carlotta did the same. Casey was clearly upset. She hugged herself, her breathing uneven as she closed the door and leaned against it, shaking, breath short. «What happened?» I asked her and she looked at me surprised, like she didn't known I was there. I looked at the door behind her. «Where is Marcia?» 

Casey trembled and took deep breaths. I was ready to approach her, comfort her, thinking she got a panic attack, but she spoke to me, voice shaking. «She... She hit Patricia with a chair and run away.» She said, pulling away from the door, walking up and down the room before settling in the corner, sitting and hugging her knees, the other bed in front of her hiding her.

"She tried to escape with Patricia in control?" Carlotta laughed by my side. Even she could see how stupidly dangerous that was. And Carlotta had been well known for jumping into dangers without fear. "Didn’t you already tell her there was another locked door after those two?”

«That moron.» I cursed, rubbing my face. One think was certain, she wouldn't be joining us again any time soon. Maybe she couldn't see it. Maybe she actually thought she had a chance here. Perhaps she had reached that level of desperation that it seemed worth the risk at the moment. Either way, I needn't to be a psychic to know, she wouldn't get far.

«Patricia went after her. She had a knife.» 

"Knife." I heard Carlotta exclaim behind me, finally recalling something very, very important. "Coral I have paper cutter blades under the soles on your boots." She guided me and like she said, I took of my shoe and removed the bottom layer, revealing a thin silver blade, from a paper cutter. I hadn't even realize it was there. I looked back at Carlotta with my most confused expression and she simply shrugged, motioning with her hands to give it o Casey. I took it out, and immediately stretched my hand towards Casey who looked at me like I was nuts.

«Take it.» I encouraged her. «If they separate us, you'll have something to use.» She got up and leaned closer, taking it in her hand, examining it. She looked so familiar with such an object in her hands but also so uncomfortable. She slid it down her boot, her eyes and cheeks wet with tears. She was terrified. And though she had every reason to be, I couldn't bring myself to feel the same. Not even when the door bursted open after some time and Dennis walked in absolutely furious.

«You.» She pointed at Casey who like a good soldier shot up from the bed she was sitting at, and wrapped her arms around herself protectively. Dennis held the door open and stepped aside. «Come with me.» He said and Casey looked down at her boot, no doubt wondering if it was the right time to use the blade on him. Like a smart girl she was, she didn't. She walked out, Dennis not even bothering to close the doors, as he led her out of the rooms and down the corridor.

I dare not walk out of the room, I sat there, like the good girl I was, until Patricia finally entered again the room, wearing once more, heels and skirt. 'Just how quick do they change?' I wondered. Patricia helped me up, I was already shorter that her without the heels so when I stood up by her side, I felt tiny. She didn't speak, only smiled sweetly as she led me out on the corridor all the way to the kitchen. I turned my head as we entered the kitchen looking for a slight clue of the others could possibly be. When I saw nothing but a dim lit corridor I turned to Patricia with whom I had grown comfortable and bold enough to make questions and perhaps a conversation. «Where is she?» 

«You've caused plenty of trouble so far, so you'll be kept separate.» She answered casually, not bothered by my question. I was on idiot, she wouldn't tell me where exactly she was, and she most definitely wouldn't let me see them. So I only tried to defend them, to excuse their actions, to someone who I doubted fully captured their own crime.

«You can't blame them for doing so. They are afraid.» I reminded her as we entered the kitchen. It was plain, a table with two mismatched chairs, light yellow cupboards. The cheap materials and the structure of the room were so much like the old kitchen back home. Clean but old and ruined wood, the buzzing fridge and yellow light of the lamps send shivers down my spine. I wanted to stay, but I wanted so badly to leave. It made me nauseous.

«No, I can't. It's just for safety's sake. Tomorrow is a big night, we can't have any of that.» She helped me sit to a chair, pushing me closer to the table after I had. I expected her to move around, to leave from behind me, but instead, she started combing my hair with her fingers again, pulling them behind keeping them together with a clip so they didn't fall to my face. «You can't escape him, dear. The Beast is going to come for all of you.» She sighed serene and calm. Almost like the thought took a weight off her shoulders.

«I'll put on some music.» She told me, leaving me and approaching the kitchen. She pressed a button on a radio and the room was immediately filled with notes of Asian Music. The soft melodies played around us, but I could hardly hear them, my eyes and ears fixed to the woman who seemed to repeat the familiar movements of my mother, pulling out pans and tools. «Do you cook?» She turned to ask me, sweetly, lightly like a mother. Probably the role she was meant to fill. She did an amazing job. 

I had to shallow, the comb in my neck before managing to answer and when I did I had to remember what she had asked me. «I prefer baking.» I replied eventually.

«Of course, I should have known.» She chuckled, not giving any explanation further to how she could had possibly known such thing. Instead she changed the subject. She did that with easy, like she had practiced the art of distracting someone from a subject for years. Of course it could ad been unimportant, but her face twitched before she proceeded to change it. A small twist on the right side of her lips. «So tell me more about stones. Corals aren't actual stones, are they?» She asked, turning her back on me, busy like a bee, walking around the kitchen.

«They are underwater plants, they are just categorized as stones sometimes. Due to the hard exterior.» I explained. She didn't comment it, she only kept bringing out more ingredient so I kept quiet, waiting for her next question. When she did notice I didn't continue she turned and checked if I was still there, a small soft smile appearing in her face.

«Go on. I don't bite.» She told me, her voice hinting an inner joke that brought me chills. I shifted uncomfortably and continued, with random facts about corals I recalled from my mom. Somehow the spiritual importance of my talisman felt real with those stories. Rooted facts and history that went back hundreds of years. Occasionally, I thought they might had been true, that the coral that hang on my neck, might had protected me, from something worse than my father. 

«Greek and Roman ladies wore earrings with coral beads, to attract husbands. They had a specific name due to the myth of coral's creation. Gorgonides.»  _Go now Gorgonida mu, go to your room, I need to speak with Papa._

«You know a lot about Greece, don't you?» She commented and I could had passed it as a rhetorical question but instead I chose to explain where I had gained such knowledge. 

«My mom told me, though she wasn't Greek herself and she had never been there.» I stopped, pinching myself for giving extra unrequited information. Thankfully she didn't bother commenting anything about it, though I wasn't sure whether it was because she had kept it in her mind or she had dismissed it. Nevertheless I took courage from her silence, and proceeded on taking a risky step to test how far I could go for information.

«I mean no offense, miss Patricia, it's merely something that got me curious and I have no way of smoothing it.» I blurted out, her head turning with curiosity. It was a bad idea to ask such thing. But I wouldn't back down. I breathed in trying to relax under her examining stare. «Do you often hold conversations and treat so kindly people you are about to have killed?» I asked eventually. Her eyebrows shot up in surprise but her face betrayed neither anger or amusement. «Again, I mean no offense, it isn't some sort of attack. Curiosity simply.» I hurried to explain. The right side of her lip twitching as she smirked at me.

«Some taken.» She said only, turning back to cutting her mushrooms. Every time the knife hit the wood with noise I questioned my logical thinking. I never knew I could be so straight forward. Carlotta usually took credit for that. «You are chatty, friendly and a rather good company, unlike your friends. You are... brave. Being so open like that.» My eyebrows rose at that. How funny that the trait I worried that would get me killed sooner, had managed to become Patricia's favorite.

«I have taken a liking in you. But I am not your enemy, I simply do my duty to the Beast. I only serve him.» She warned and reminded me, not getting my hopes up. Reminding me that I wasn't special in here. Yet I dared hope this would change. If she could be talked out of my killing, then possibly the others could too. That was, if that Beast was even a human to reason with. Because if it was an animal alter we were dealing with, reason and talking would hardly help me. Therefore, I could count on their moral compass or their favor. I needed a backup plan, and an escape plan. One to use if the other failed.

«Blind obedience?» I smiled, because, as I got know more about her, the more I found myself in her. Was my blind obedience to my father's lie that had made me fall out with Carlos and pretty much bonded me in this situation? Blind obedience felt safe. Like someone else, stronger, smarter, more capable that you, was taking the decisions, and it was off your shoulders. And when mixed with fear, like in my case, you ignored the common knowledge in your head, and never doubted things that obviously were not moral.

«Don't judge, girl. He's a wonder. He'll purify this world.» Only in Patricia's case, she portrayed him as a god. And what was a god if not both a terrifying father and a protector, and a guide. She didn't really seemed afraid of him, but that was only because she knew she was on his good side as long as she served him. No, I couldn't count on her, she was nowhere brave enough to 

«I don't judge. Honestly.» I breathed, biting my lip to prevent a smile. Even though I could hear it in my voice. 

«What stone do you think would suit me?» She asked, the subject turning once again. It bothered me a bit. It was like my way of avoiding things. I was good at running away. And apparently so was she. And I knew why. It was the same feeling that I was in control of my own actions that made it so sweet. 

I paused at her question, recalling meanings of stones and attempting to match them with her personality. When I failed, I tried to find something she needed. I had matched easily my Passengers. Caroline was a garnet, while Carlotta was much of a ruby. Carlos seemed to need a Bloodstone desperately. «Obsidian.» I decided eventually.

She turned at me slowly. «Why?» She asked, obviously familiar with the pitch black stone but not its properties.

«Associated with insight and helps one to see the truth.» I explained. Her eyes bored into mine, looking for lies and mischief. 'You can't make fun of us, we are stronger than you think.' Dennis had said. She was the same, wondering if I made a joke against her. Of course, she could be offended by it. I basically called her blind. But in reality what I hoped her to be more passive. For her to see how wrong this was.

«Is that so?» She trailed and I nodded. «Good for you.» Was all she said. She said nothing and kept quiet. Observing her movements, her peace as she stood above the cooking pot and mumbled melodies to herself, different from the ones on the radio, creating her own lovely remix. It felt so familiar, so warm and peaceful. It felt like home and I hated how much I had missed home. So much to find it in a stranger.

I lean back to my chair and I'm a child again. Papa out drinking and me and mom in the kitchen enjoying each other's company in silence. Patricia seemed to adjust easily to the role and without me saying anything she managed to mimic memories that I held dear. Next thing I knew, she placed two plate with steaming hot soup on the table. «Here, tell me what you think.» She sang, passing me a spoon, and sitting on the other chair. The spell lifted but the serenity remained so I couldn't help my smile as we sat and ate.

«Is that parsley?» I questioned, trying to understand what I was tasting. Patricia's face lit up.

"What are the possibilities she is poisoning you?" Carlotta questioned startling me. She hadn't spoke at all, all this time. I had nearly forgotten she was there with me. 

"Doubt it. She is to be eaten, she wouldn't risk to poison her lovely Beast." Carol responded for me. I suppressed a smile. I wondered if they had watched Patricia from behind me, and saw what I saw. I wondered if they understood how serene I felt at the moment. How this domestic moments filled me with happiness.

«And peppermint. Do you like it?» Patricia smiled with pride before I could even express how much I did. Her inner cook sharing a secret about the recipe with a playful note and no holding back. Could it be she enjoyed it as much as I?

«It's delicious.» I said and like a diva she looked away and huffed like saying 'stop you're making me blush' 

«Finally, someone appreciates good food.» She exclaimed and sank her spoon in her soup. I mimicked her movements. «Bon Appetite, dear.» 


	10. Chapter 10

**Coraline**

The soup made me sleepy. So sleepy I started to rething Carlotta's poisoning warning. I ended up falling asleep in the Driver's seat. The dreams were twisted. Although they were not necessarily scary but they certainly were not comforting. I was at my house, in the kitchen. Of course Mom wasn't there. I still waited for her on the table while Papa was out. I pretended she was gonna come down any moment. It had become quite a habit the past few weeks. I was becoming pretty good at ignoring the smell around the house. Just sitting in the kitchen like a good girl waiting until Papa came back and Carlos took over. I was zoned out, too tired to care about it though.

The kitchen was crowded. The police came in and out. The police lady on the other side of the table was asking me things. I didn't hear her, maybe the Bus was faulty, it seemed to have blocked out my Passengers too. I could see her lips move. She looked funny, all concerned and full of pity. What an idiot. She soon took notice I wasn't responding and got up with a sigh. Soon a lady in her forties sat in her place. She had her slightly grey hair tied up in a tight but, like a ballerina. She wore a polo neck jumper and a skirt, a black rock hanging from a gold chain on her neck. She had the kindest of smiles on her face. But she was wretched in blood. And so was the tall strict man with the ironed shirt and the glasses that stood behind her. And the kid with the joggers, and headphones that danced ridiculously around the living room. The girl with the ripped top and the blue jeans seemed clean, but her hands were still bloody. Or the rest of the people that occupied themselves around the house which I couldn't really make out. But it was the growling outside that scared me most, and the devilish figure outside the kitchen's window. 

I awoke slowly. Partly. But when I was finally conscious, I was awfully awake and aware of my surroundings, self, the hand around my waist, and the heat of a body against my back. I didn't dare make a noise.  _He would beat me up if I woke him up_ . But apparently my stiff body betrayed me because he moved and pushed up.  _No. No. Please no._ «Hey.» I whispered the moment I realized no one but Hedwig was in the bed with me. Somehow I didn't find that very comforting.

«Hey. It wasn't nice what you guys did.» He murmured in my hair with complain. Shutting my eyes I released a long sigh, guilt creeping into me again. I shot a nasty look at my Passengers which was returned with cold apathy. No one cares if the child is hurt. They all think the betrayals never settle for long. That the pain doesn’t stick around for ever. Probably why, everyone saw the signs and still took the police weeks to come to our house.

«I'm sorry Hedwig, I should had stopped them.» 

«I got scared. Etcetera.» He whispered back, a note of sadness in his voice as he held me closer like a teddy bear. I was unsure whether he did that out of instinct or he was trying to dramatize the moment, to point out he was scared. Either way I covered his huge hand with mine to comfort him, he didn't seem to mind.

«I'm really sorry. I'm an awful friend.» I apologized again.

I felt my breath leave me as he pressed my waist, and pushed himself up, me laying underneath him. He was heavy but he didn't realize it. He leaned above me, not knowing that I was uncomfortable with a big form like his hovering above me like the Reaper. Even though his face was pure innocence, I found it hard to make out the kid beneath the skin of the man. It was hard to tell myself he was harmless. When he looked down on me, and I lied defenseless beneath him, it was hard to remind myself, that it wasn't a man but a kid there. There was no way of explaining to him why I wanted him farther away. I could never explain how familiar the picture of a bigger man over me was, and how my body and mind prepared for the raw pain and the nauseous smell and the scary voices he made and bottomless violation, discomfort and horror. Still I couldn't prevent the instinct as I pushed away, sitting up and pulling my legs to my chest and locking them together. He didn't even notice the defensive movement. «Miss Patricia said you ate her soup.»

«Yes, it was delicious.» I nodded, voice an octave higher than normal. He didn't care. He only wrinkled his nose with disgust and gave me a doubtful look. 

«I don't like it. It has mushrooms.»He announced in denial and I raised an eyebrow, how childish of him, he was incredibly cute and didn't really tried to be. Just how much more would I have of this guy's kid lines. They never seemed to end and I felt like I was babysitting once again. It was pleasantly refreshing to recall the reasons I had chosen the path of a teaching career.

«Do you like mushrooms in pizza?» I asked him and he frowned confused. He shrugged and nodded unsure. 

«Um, yeah, I guess.»

«Then you'll like them on the soup.» I concluded and he paused putting some thought to it. He narrowed his eyes at me and pouted his lips before giving up with an eye roll and a shrug.

«Fine, I'll try it.» He said with defeat, dropping his shoulders.

«Do you know who miss Patricia and mister Dennis are?» He questioned, as if he was about to spill the tea. I put some thought to it. I knew they were alters. I knew they probably were his caretakers. But just in case he had something else to say, I shook my head and leaned closer, looking curious.

«Tell me.»

«Every one of us has to wait in a chair, and Barry, he decides who stands in the light.» I nodded. I knew some of this. Barry seemed to be a dominant personality but I had yet to meet him. Wonder what he was like. «But Barry lost that power because of me. I can wish myself into the light anytime I want. It's a special power. Barry just has to keep sitting in his chair if I want him to.» That was another surprise. If Hedwig had such dominant role in the mind, where were the caretakers? Patricia? She matched a parent figure, that's for sure. So did Dennis, he gave of the vibe of an Alpha Male. «That's why Mr Dennis and Miss Patricia said I could be with them. Mr Dennis and Miss Patricia, they believe in The Beast and what he can do.»

«What can he do?» I asked and watched as panic and ignorance took over his face. Poor kid had been brainwashed by grown ups. Twisted into thinking he was important to them, only asking for attention and love. Somehow he reminded me of a little girl, who only wanted her father's love, and was willing to make herself believe, that even in its worse form it was acceptable.

«I-I don't know.» He stuttered disappointed but then in milliseconds his eyes shone again. «C-Can I kiss you?» He asked quickly. It came out of nowhere. It took me by surprise, and I happen to very much dislike those. I pulled back like I had been hit by electricity, my back hitting the wall behind me. The image of the kid I had in my mind faltering again, fearing that another alter was sharing control with him, telling him to ask such silly things. 

«What?» I asked fighting the knot on my throat. I had heard him, of course. Loud and clear, but I wanted to check if I had misunderstood, which I probably had. Still he didn't seem to notice, he only shifted awkwardly and fidget around nervous. I had to hold back a bitter laugh. A mix of relief and sadness overwhelming me. There were no motives behind this. This nine-year old was just having his probably first conversation with someone who didn't make fun of the situation. And he was obviously curious about the kissing thing. I didn't want to, not really. But how could I resist those puppy eyes and I didn’t want to face the consequences of rejecting him. 

«I wanted to kiss the other girl with the dark hair, but she's in trouble.» He mumbled trying to look indifferent and cool about it. Part of me, one I had never encountered before, wanted to tease him, play hard to get and have a laugh. But logic told me he would be offended by such thing. «So, do you want to?»

«I- Yeah.» I said quickly when he started backing away. His eyes shone and mine shut closed, I waited him to count to three, fought back a smile and a few bad thoughts that seemed to never back out when a man was near. He leaned in and awkwardly touched my lips with his. I repeated to myself that he was a kid again and again. For once I actually felt comforted by my own words. Breathing through his nose in my face and not really doing anything. The stillness was nice. Comforting. Then he pulled away. And I only felt like laughing because I thought this would be terrifying, but I felt nothing but the fading adrenaline. I didn't open my eyes immediately. Waiting in the dark for anything that betrayed how the situation would evolve.  _A grap on my hair, pulling and pushing me simply to show of his power._

«You might be pregnant now.» I heard him say, and I just smiled. Just how innocent was he? Because sure as hell I was nowhere near the meaning of the word. He looked up at me with those glassy blue eyes, like he expected me to tell him something. And I really hoped he didn't expect to hear whether I was pregnant or not. «Am I a good kisser?» He asked after a while tilting his head with curiosity.

«Yeah. Am I?» I asked even though it didn't really matter. Just wanted him to feel like his opinion mattered, because he clearly needed to feel listened to and important. 

«Yeah!»He exclaimed full of happiness then added shyly. «So you're my girlfriend now?» I cocked my head confused. I nodded hesitantly, unsure of where this was going. Knowing his imagination this little guy might even ask to marry me next. His eyes glimmed with victory and he adjusted his body to sit more straight and confidently. Then chattily he started telling me about his passion with dance and he looked genually happy. «I like dancing to my CD player in my room. Kanye West is my main man. We got my CD player set up in my room, right next to my window. I'm like...We gots the moves.» He moved his upper body in motion in what was supposed to be a dance move.

"He has a window." Carlotta shook my shoulder violently to alarm me. "Coral we need to get to his room!" She exclaimed with excitement and the words slipped from my mouth unfiltered. «Can I watch you dance?» I asked Hedwig who frowned once again. 

«No, my music's in my room.» He shook his head but I wasn't taking no for an answer here. Or rather, we didn't, because when I looked down, I realized, Carlotta had the wheel with me. I didn’t stop her, daring to trust 

«Maybe you can sneak me there?» I offered but he immediately caught up with it, confronting me about it. He frowned and looked at me bothered and hurt. Guilt found its way back in my belly. One step low, how lower could we go? From tricking children, to hurting them and who knows what and who else. I hated it, things like that, the feeling I was like them, left the most bitter of tastes in my mouth. He was an innocent, no matter what was happening around him, he was not to blame. He was just a child.

«Are you tricking to me? Etcetera?» He questioned, getting up quickly. Carlotta was quicker and she grabbed his arm as I hurried to reassure him. Like the double agent I appeared to be I secured on side but helped the other. How much meaner, could one get? 

«I promise, Hedwig.» I hurried to say, but not to lie. «I won't try to run away. And I won't try to do anything bad as long as you are with me.» I set the loose term gracefully. He had no idea what I was planning to do, and at the moment neither did I. I just followed instructions, I just tried to cooperate a bit and not without feeling bad. «I'll sit with you, watch you dance. I'll listen to music with you. And we can draw a bit.»

«Like a date?» He asked slyly. 

«Sure. Like a date.» I agreed forcing a smile. 

«Fine. I'll show you something cool in my room.» He agreed after thinking about it for a while. Then he shot up and walked to the door. «But after Mr. Dennis has finished his getting-ready ritual. I have to go. He's got an appointment. When I fall asleep, one of the others keeps trying to reach the doctor lady to tell on us.» He said quickly and walked out, doors closing behind him with noise. But without locking it. Such was his confidence that I’d be here when he returned.

"Coral?" Carol's voice came by my side, uncertain and hesitant. I turned my head, giving her my attention, it was all she needed to go on. "He said he was going out. On a doctor appointment. It is safe to assume he will be gone for more than half an hour." She said and I paused. Was she really, really proposing for us to attempt to just walk out of here? I stared at her, waiting for some joke or more details but she didn't give any, like she had no explanation to give. It was slightly reasonable. I mean, we only needed to open the doors, the rest couldn't be hard. We'd find someone near and then straight to the police. Half an hour seemed enough to find a way out of a basement. 

I turned to Carlotta. "You can still pick locks right?" I asked and she immediately caught up. I jumped up and let her drive. She pulled out a knife from the bra band in my back, I hadn't even realize that between the bands was a metal part, it was almost the same with the papercut blade I had given to Casey. I watched as Carlotta used it to open the door with ease. She had taught me that trick, I could had done it too if I had thought it was that simple.

We limped out of the room, the place was silent, and as Carlotta pressed her ear to the next door, I realized it was extremely quiet. "Find something to use as a cruntch." I told her. From the many things in the room, we settled with a broomstick without the broom part. 

"Should I release the others?" Carlotta questioned as she attempted to open the next door. I shook my head disliking the idea, Carol's face agreeing with me.

"No, don't. If we get caught they'll act either stupid or just get hurt in their hurry." Carol told Carlotta just when the door opened. "Just go, the police will help them." I reassured. 

At the kitchen door we paused, checking if he was there, same with every other room until we reached a door that was locked. It was the same one I had hit my leg on. The room around me, which I hadn't notice much last time, was a living-dining room with old or cheap furniture. We didn't bother exploring, with no much effort, after two unlocked doors, Carlotta opened the third one and that click that filled the silence echoed like a blessing in my heart. Yet, I hoped we wouldn't get lost after, because I didn't know the way from here.

It was something like a boiler room, plumbs and machines all the way straight ahead, low lights and dirty floors and walls. I had never watched thrillers but I knew this corridor was straight out of one. Probably the whole scenario of kidnapping and Beasts followed along. Wonder where did Patricia got her inspiration from. We kept walking, more slowly this time, looking for a door or any other exit. A lamp flickered above us and I paused waiting for an attack. Carlotta, casual and cool kept going, carefully and slowly but still with confidence.

"Time?" Carlotta questioned to Carol who responded mechanically like Siri.

"It's been 15 minutes." She informed us and Carlotta turned sharply at her, the bUs and body stopping with her.

"Already?!" She exclaimed in both panic and surprise.

"You walk slowly and the last door took you 5 whole minutes to open." Carol explained. Carlotta started walking again, this time a bit faster. Only for us to fall down a couple of times. We passed a couple of lockers, and a metal cage when eventually we faced some stairs and light. Pure, sunlight. I grabbed the Wheel from Carlotta and climbed up the stairs myself like a desperate woman. When I finally reached the floor I fell once again from fear.

Next to me, a leopard roared and attacked the glass that separated us. I paused shocked, looking at the animal. It walked around its cage and glanced at me, rubbing her back on the glass like a cat. I got closer, knowing I was safe, I sat on my legs watching it. «Hey beautiful.» I greeted and the leopard growled at me from inside. 

"We are in a zoo aren't we?" Carlotta sighed with disappointment. I ignored her, the wild animal was scratching the glass trying to get me and it looked so pretty and strong yet so cute scratching a glass like that. I pressed my hands on the glass and smiled, the leopard cocked its head. Carol shook my shoulder."Coral you need to find someone, it's been nearly a-" She tried to say but she was interrupted.

«How did you get out?» My head turned towards the deep familiar voice and in the sudden motion I fell back on my butt. I opened my mouth to answer but there was no need to, at the hand which I held the stick, I also held an obvious metal blade. I held in defense but he grabbed my hand and opened my fist with ease, taking the blade and throwing it further away. With this he placed the broomstick on the corner and swipped me off my feet. I tried to scream for help but my voice was covered by the fuss the animals made. Not knowing what else to do, I put up a fight. Tried to kick and bite but before I knew it we were down on the basement again, and I felt like the leopard in the cage. Scratching the glass for a way out without hope.

When he noticed I wouldn't stop kicking and that my fight increased with every step he took, he dropped me. And pushed me on a wall. My leg wasn't ready for the sudden weight and I'd had fallen down if it wasn't for his grip on neck dangerously pressing me and keeping me in place. I ceased any movement immediately and shut my eyes closed in fear, my hands immediately leaving the wheel. I knew what followed. He had spared me once, there wouldn't be a second time, I had gone too far, I had basically asked to be punished.

«I am trying to be good.» He breathed voice low. «I really am trying.» He whispered strangling and and pressing my neck more, just enough for less oxygen to pass. I held back the tears. "Let me." Carlotta said by my said but I only shook my head, placing my hands back on the wheel. She had a temper, and so did he. It would only make it worse. Carlos was the one that was supposed to take over in such situations, but he wasn't there. I had to keep driving, Carlotta would make the situation worse and Carol would talk back resulting on the same thing. «I thought you'd be good.» He sighed and his hand relaxed, allowing me to breath properly. His eyes and hand wondered lower but then he pushed away like I had burned him.

«It's dirty!» He exclaimed in fury and disgust before shrugging and gagging in pain in some sort of seizure. Then someone else took over, the daring eyes and confident posture immediatly betrayed Jade to be in control. The danger had passed, he was gone and I was safe from the merciless hands of man. I realized it immediately even though I felt no relief. Yet I allowed Carlotta to pull me away and Caroline took over for me immediately.

**Caroline**

«Woah!» The alter exclaimed leaning back, looking impressed. «So it's true! You nearly got out!» She marveled and chuckled. Somehow Coral's fears was still coursing in me, calming down gradually. The girl alter stood back, understanding we were feeling upset.

«If you had given me a couple of minutes more, I would had actually made it.» I laughed, yet some of the tears Coral had held back slided down. I straightened my back and wiping the tears away. I cleared my throat and rubbed the aching skin in the base of my neck. Coral's father didn't have half the strength of this man. What a dangerous enemy to make. Yet little brave Coral had attempted to threaten him with a blade.

«Guuuurl! You are fucking badass.» The girl chuckled again and walked closer. «I knew you had brains. But man!» She smiled and leaned closer, a smirk on her face and looking casually sweet. "She's flirting." Carlotta confirmed by my side before I had the chance to ask her. I had pent plenty of time with Carlotta all this years but for the first time I had felt so old. How long had it been? I used to break so many hearts when I was young. The girl strangled and shrugged as if in pain. «Oh fuck.» Then she was no longer there, Patricia had taken over. And her hand wrapped around my wrist like a snake.

«Aren't you a clever one?» She hissed trying to intimidate me. With her kind I was glad to deal with. Having grown in a strict British family I knew first hand her vicious tactics. I often used them myself. My daughter trembled at this side of me. I didn't fear it on others, I despised it. Now I much prefered to act like a teenage rebel than my mother. The toxicity of her behavior and the force she used to scare us was nothing but s psychological game, and after years of treating patients who had been traumatized by such behaviors, I knew not to let it affect me.

«I would most certainly hope so, miss.» I smiled sweetly. She frowned and instead of answering she pulled off the wall and led me all the way to the house in silence. It was when she locked the front door twice that she spoke again. 

«You can't escape him.» She tsk-ed sweetly and matter of factly. Her certainty was supposed to shake me but I knew bluffs when I heard them. So I only smiled again and she clearly disliked my confidence. Her trace of a grin disappeared when I opened my mouth too, only for mine to widen. Oh the satisfaction to mess with this woman.

«So, you're telling me. But I almost did.» 

"Since when do you provoke people?" Carlotta questioned amused. I only shrugged and cracked a smile. 

«Have you done this before little one?» Patricia asked playfully something melodic on her tone. Something shining in her eyes.

«Escape from a well made comfy prison?» I asked with the same tone, returning the face at its best.

"Carol you're being creepy." Coral muttered worryingly but from the rearview mirror, a small smile had made its way on her lips and voice.

"That's meant to be the point, love." I responded dryly, returning the smile playfully.

«If that's what you wish to call it.» Patricia shrugged and walked in the kitchen with swaying hips, opening the door for me. I limped out, smile never erased from my lips. 

«Maybe.» I said which should had been taken as a 'yes'. We had helped Coral escape her first foster house thrice before the parents found out about me and the Twins and decided they couldn't deal with a mentally sick child. But I wouldn't let her know we had such experience with escaping and running away. Not it would make things worse. She had already realized we were much more handful than she originally thought and her guard was up.

«Have you been hurt, child?» She asked, her touch light and caring. Inside the Bus Carlotta scoffed at her gesture of pity. If anyone in here disliked to be addressed about our life was Carlotta, she had more pride than even I did. She didn't want people to know how broken Coral was. And it was ironic, because while we had been through some bothersome situations, the man in front of us had probably been through worse. Considering the math always.

«Have you?» I asked back. The smile fading out.

«We have suffered more than you think.» She admitted without shame or self pity. For once I admired the strength of the woman who knew and respected her life experiences without dramatizing them. Yet something stirred in me. 

«Did it break you?» 

«No. We were stronger than that.» She smiled and I got even more sour. I was an awful person indeed, acting the way I did. She opened another door for me and we stood in the room before the room that served our cell.

«But it broke him. Into 24 pieces. Didn't it? » I'm unsure as to why I acted and said such things. I clearly irritated her and knowing her buttons now, I came to realize I didn't want to stop pressing them. If we were to die by her hand, least I could do was give her a hard time and a good reason to before doing so. Which was a stupid way of thinking, Coral had made such good job befriending them, and here I was wrecking it all down. Patricia scoffed and raised her chin with hurt pride.

«You are making fun of us. You have no idea what true pain is.» She said.«You are asleep.»

«I am, aren't I?» I said in mockery. «Asleep, trapped in a nightmare.» She paused and stared at me as I put the final nail on our coffin. I had blamed Carlotta for being impulsive in the past and here I was acting the same. «You are awake Patricia. But tell me...» I cocked my head innocently, looking at her blandly. I leaned forward playfully, her breath got caught. «Is your nightmare over?» I questioned and a second after my words sank in the silence, her hand met my face with relatively little force compared to the damage she could really do. Her face was no longer calm. She looked angry, bitter, cold, and hurt. I laughed. I didn't expect her to actually hit me, not that I didn't as for it. My laugh only made her angrier, she grabbed my hair and opened the final door furiously.

«Yours will soon be. You'll learn to kneel before the broken.» She hissed at me, her grip in my hair viciously tight and she pushed me on the room violently. I fell on my knees and laughed again. This woman had some nerve. The door closed and locked 

"You still like them?" I questioned Coral when we were left alone. She bit her lip and looked down disappointed. She had nearly tasted freedom and she had been denied it again. Patricia had stepped of her line and hit her. If that wasn't enough for her to grow bitter against her captors I didn't know what would.

"Hedwig will come." I reassured. 

"You'll have to use his window. Stab him in the spine, he won't follow you." Carlotta told her with a painfully casual tone. She basically told Coral to deadly hurt a clueless child and had no regret in asking her so. Made me question whether she had done it herself and how many times.

"I gave a promise." Coral muttered weakly looking at her feet. She was fighting herself. In more than one way. Carlotta and her own mind were attacking her. She knew she had to do something but she didn't want to.

"It's worth nothing." Carlotta responded without hesitation and for I moment I consider taking her out to explain once again that she should show more empathy at such moments. I had worked hard to make Coral understand she should keep her promises, Carlotta didn't get to change her values like that. Especially when I had worked so hard to build them. But then again, she was right, compared to her life, a broken promise was a small price to pay.

"It does to him." She insisted and for a good reason. I was the one to teach her about the value of promises and the art of bending the rules when giving one. I knew she had followed my advises when she gave that promise to the kid but she still avoided to use her hidden weapon. I couldn't blame her, she wanted to be kind to the child. And she empathized with the rest of her captors. Still at this point it was suicidal of her not to act up to save her own life at least. I thought she'd at least put the girls as a priority but at this point I couldn't tell her priorities at all. 

"But-"

"I promised!" Coral cried out and Carlotta fell silent. Little Coraline had never raised her voice like this.

"But we didn't." I told her after a while and she froze before nodding defeated. She would let us take control, do as we thought fit. But she seemed to hate herself for doing so. "Fetch Carlos. When time comes, you can do whatever you wish." That was all Carlotta needed as she jumped out and run down to the Farm. 

"I knew you had some goddamn sense in you." She yelled as she run away. Coral seemed devastated. She sat away and kept silent. I sat by her side and she leaned on me as I pet her hair and mumbled melodies to calm her guilt and fear. 

"I don't like people getting hurt." She whispered, her voice cracking, tears falling. Fragile little Coral sounded weak as she cuddled next me, looking for some comfort. I couldn't help but smile sadly down at her. She used to cuddle like that all the time. Until Sofia took care of her, she turned to us for the hardships. Now look at us. Strangers in a Bus. Turning on each other. No wonder Coral was lost.

"I pity you." The words slipped off my lips before I could progress them. Surprisingly enough Coral didn't react to them, as if she hadn't hear them but that was impossible because she lied in my arms and I had spoken them pretty loudly." You are fighting to be yourself yet you are want to die standing." It was a quite dramatic explanation but she didn't judge. 

"I'll be on my knees when I allow Carlotta to hurt the kid." 

"She's not you." I hurried to tell her even though I was technically wrong. Psychologically speaking, we were all her. Broken altered pieces of her character, needs and memories. Psychologically speaking we were her but stronger so that we'd take the damage. Somehow it had turned to be the other way around.

"But she is. All of you are." She sighed, sinking deeper into the hug.

"Are we?" I questioned mostly to myself. "Have we ever been you?" 

"Dr. Fletcher said-" 

"I know. I have studied D.I.D. myself. But in what do we all have in common in this Bus?" I was talking nonsense. Perhaps it was the emotions taking control and easing the air with small doubts and lies. I dared doubt proven facts to make my little girl feel better but I could hardly call it a bad think at the moment.

"Carlotta, the biker whore with supressed homicidal urges. Carlos, the returned marine soldier with P.T.S.D. and an old University Professor with Ph.D. and a shady past that even you don't know about." I listed chuckling. She was ignorant. Ignorant of herself and of our pasts. She had no idea the sins I had commited and probably she had no clue of what Carlos’ or Carlotta’s childhood was like. Unlike me who had conversed with them as an adult and learned about it. But no. She was a mere child yet. "The only thing we have in common is how deeply we all care for you. And that we are all ghosts."

" Mom's theory?" There was a tone of disappointment in her voice as she pulled away. She used to love this theory. I had reached a point I had nearly believed myself when her mother went on about it. Now knowing the truth, that there was no magic and ghost inhabiting her body, we laughed at how childish we were thinking back there.

"Yes, but that is not what I meant." I strangled to explain with words that didn't scare her more. "Did you know that last thing we remember before waking up here, was dying?" She looked up, eyebrows drawn together. She looked confused and bothered. "The Twins remember their deaths too, but we never told your mom. We are dead people dear. Not necessarily in the literal sense. We lost ourselves while we lived."

"No you didn't. You found them." She hurried to argue.

"Then we were and are truly monsters." She didn't know. Not the full stories. We had shared so much with her. But we never told her our sins. We were full of them but we never told her the full picture. We only told each other how awful we were when we where alive, letting each other make assumptions. Some times we all wondered, why had Coral created such dark and angry sides to us, when she didn't appear to have one herself. "And if we are truly part of you. You are too."

"I don't care for me. My actions are my own." She declared with confidence and steady voice. I was unsure whether I should believe her or not. "And I forgive you. And if they knew they made a mistake, I would forgive them too." At first I thought she meant the Twins. I couldn't fandom anyone else. Then I saw her eyes looking back to the Memories of Patricia and the other alters. It ached. I craved her care, but I was actually fighting for it. What had they done to deseve it? What had he done? 

"Would you after?"

"Yes." She answered without the slightest hesitation. Without the smallest of doubts. She either fooled herself, or was being painfully honest. And I couldn't tell which was the worst. I didn't get it. Why would she ever forgive them. Why was she so keen on forgiving him after so many years of abuse?

"Why?"

"I don't wanna know what I would be if I didn't." She said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world and I suddenly felt furious towards her kind-hearted mother who had taught her so much compassion. I felt furious towards her God for teaching her to love her enemies. I felt furious to the world for reasons I didn't quite understood. But I had to admit one painful truth here. I would rather her hurting than being corrupted into the boiling anger that had affected nearly all humanity.

"Neither do I." I admitted in a faint whisper. Turning my head to the window, I saw the two figures that run towards us in the path of the Farm. With a sigh I tapped Coral's shoulder and pointed to them.

"Get up. He'll be here any minute now." I told her a sigh even longer than mine she stood up and wiped away some tears before standing to the doors waiting for the duo to arrive.

"I trust Carlotta explained it all?" She asked lightly as Carlos walked in and a painfully long awkward silence followed. During this silence Carlos was looking surprised down to Coral and she sweetly up to him. Carlotta was giving her brother death-glares and Coral tight smiles. No one was looking at me but I bit my lip to stop myself from laughing at their awkward situation. Coral only awaited for the answer, almost unaware of the electricity in the air.

"She did?" Carlos answered, or rather asked after a long while and Coral nodded satisfied. And that was all we needed for things to go back to normal.


	11. Chapter 11

**Coraline**

It took him centuries to come. It took him years to finally open that door and when he did, he didn't come inside. He stood in the door looking awkward and grim. «You lied.» He accused me folding his arms in his chest. The posture immediately reminded of Dennis. The frowned face and his hands folded, if it wasn't for the hurt glassy blue eyes, I would had doubted the personality in control. 

«No I didn't.» I hurried to deny and he dropped his hands with anger like a kid throwing a tantrum. Truth be told, I had done exactly what he didn't want me to do. I had tricked him, and I was doing it again. Such a hypocrite. I pretended to be on his side but my every action pointed the other way. But I couldn't found it in me to deal with my guilt at the moment.

«Yeah you did! You promised you wouldn't try and get away!» 

«I said that about our date only. I won’t try get away if you are with me.» I tried to say but I was well aware it mattered nothing. He was nine. He had so little logic, only guided by his heart. How I missed the days I was free to do the same. How I envied him for not having to grow up. For not having to learn to survive. He was on the brink of tears and it broke my heart so I tried to distract him just a little bit. Just enough for him to relax. «That was a really nice kitty by the way.» I said, bringing the leopard in my mind. The wild animal growling at the chaos of a weak battle outside its cage. That seemed to take his attention of the topic just for a moment.

«I know... But Mister Dennis doesn't let me touch them.»He said slowly, still not out of his bad mood. He knew. I could tell he knew what I was doing. He was accepting it anyway though. «I'll take you on a date. Etchetera.» He gave up with a heavy sigh. «But if you try to trick me again, I'll tell Mister Dennis and Miss Patricia. And they are already angry at you. Etcetera.» He warned and opened the door for me wider. This movement had become strangely familiar now. Almost everyone had this habit of opening the doors and waiting for me to pass them by.

As we walked down the corridor, taking the other way this time, I noticed he looked more and more excited with each step he took, until he ended up skipping steps. He slowed down as we passed two closed doors and pressed his finger to his lips, warning me to keep quiet. I did and after a relatively long walk, we reached some stairs that he climbed up with large steps and waiting for me from the top of the stairs. It was not a long one, the one that had lead me to the cages was longer. Soon I was on top and he was running in the first room of the corridor, in what felt like a chase.

I felt slightly tired, a familiar fog over my thoughts but I ignored it. I stood at the door, watching Hedwig do something with his back on me. A moment later music filled the room. I had heard it before, I couldn't recall where from. I was never one to pay attention to music titles and artists. Hedwig looked over excited. He stood in confident nervousness before the music fully begun, like he was about to give a performance and when he started dancing...well...

"That's the creepiest dance I have ever seen." I heard Carlotta say loudly."And that coming from a woman who spent more time in clubs than her house, should tell you  _a lot_ ." It did. I understood her point very well, but tried not to comment it. His dance was odd. It copied popular movements from YouTube videos and mixed them with something twisted and personal. When he shrugged and walked back with a dramatic effect, it was like watching him switch personalities again. He was confident about what he was doing, that much was clear. He gave it all he got. I tried to tell myself that, without any possible dancing lessons, he was pretty good. But something in his movements gave me creeps.

"He has no window. It's a drawing." My eyes flew towards the music player above which was supposed to be my way out, only to confirm Carlos' words. There was no window, only a piece of paper with a pretty colored drawing of one. My heart sank and lightened. I was somehow calmer for reasons unknown to me yet.

"Now what?" I questioned like a soldier waiting for orders.

"Find other ways. He will spill sooner or later." Carlotta shrugged casually with little care. Somehow I felt relieved but now I had a new task that I was unaware of how to approach first. My head was spinning, and my body leaned tired on the door frame. I shut my eyes and breathed in and out for a moment. When I opened my eyes, the music had stopped and Hedwig was walking closer with big eyes, waiting impatiently for my opinion. Only I hadn't realized what he wanted just yet.

«So?» He asked and I cocked my head, confused before finally understanding what he expected to hear. Of course I 

«How did you learn to dance like that?» I asked with a small smile, and he straightened his shoulders with pride and rolled his eyes like a little diva.

«I just did . It's easy!» He shrugged with the most self-satisfied smile I had ever seen.

«Wow.» I did, without any idea of what to say. Thankfully he only thought I was speechless because he was amazing at dancing and exclaimed happily.

«I know!»

I nervously searched around the room for anything to help me. When I failed to find anything but animal drawings I pointed to the window drawing limping closer. «Is that your window?» I asked him and he was next to it with two large steps. No chance of running away from this guy. Wrestling hardly leads anywhere. What on earth did I have as an advantage here?

«Yeah! Look! Now it's closed, now it's open. Closed, open.» He said excited, lifting the first page and letting it fall again. Revealing another drawing underneath, with the same window but open. Hedwig fidgeded nervously next to me waiting for me to speak and with equal anxiety I started pointing out other unimportant things in the room to keep his mind busy.

«So many animals. Have you seen all of them?» I asked taking in the countless animals around the room. Staffed animals, drawings, figurines. He even had peacock feathers etc. Like the drawing of the window, they were all pretty colored, fully and carefully. He either had help from an adult or he was a really good artist. Hedwig nervously nodded with a small shy smile. «What's your favorite?» I asked carelessly gazing around until my eyes landed on something equally terrifying and disturbing. I had never seen a kid's drawing so twisted and dark. I had seen monsters in paper. But this went a step too far. A black figure with claws and red eyes and sharp teeth. A tiny figure on of it's hands and five similar small humans that appeared to run away.

«Tigers! Look! I have five!» I tore my gaze away from the drawing and turned to him. He had five identical stuffed tigers on his arms and around the room I noticed more tiger figurines from plastic, or stuffed with different poses and sizes.

«Pretty, have you seen one up close?» I pet one and he passed it to me to hold, melting my heart. How many kids actually share their toys willingly? I took it on my arms and sat down to the bed

«Yeah! Mr Dennis works in the Zoo! He always walks down the tiger cage! They wanted to eat him before but now they like him!»

«Awesome.» 

«Miss Patricia said she liked your necklace. She said it's magical. Is it true?» His eyes sparkled with curiosity. Had I told him it was magical he would have dismiss me with disbelief. Yet if Patricia even suggested it, he'd fall for it without a question. He must trust her a lot. Admire her even perhaps. She was his guardian probably, he was meant to listen to an adult and therefor, trust them.

«It is.» I responded after a while. Who am I to ruin the fantasy of magic to a child. «It protects kids from getting hurt.» 

«Cool!» He exclaimed, looking at the red coral branch with glimmering eyes. 

«How about a story Hedwig? About the necklace?» I don't know why I had suggested such a thing. But I told myself it was a good idea to get him asleep, for me to search the room perhaps. Or to do anything really, just to stay outside that cell.

«I do n't like stories. They are for losers.»

«You will like that one. I promise.» He didn't need much convincing. He gave up after that and he settled next to me. And so the story unfolded. And I felt both like the kid I was when I first heard about Perseus' adventures and the adult that told the story with as much of a soul they had. As I told him the story, I finally understood why Mom put up with my questions, and interruptions. I finally understood why she loved having me in her arms and telling me myths and legends of old, ancient times. And I remembered why I had loved those myths so much. It dawned on me out of nowhere; Those corals and we. Me, my Passengers, perhaps even the kid in my arms and his family in his head. We were the same. We were all created due to spilled blood and pain and we both turned to stone afterwards. Still alive underneath. Still growing. 

«Perseus, with a swing of his sharp sword, cut the head of the Gorgon Medusa, who turned to stone those who would look in her eyes. The head went rolling to the sea and from its blood became stone, the underwater plants. And that's how corals came to be.» 

By the time I finished the story, Hedwig had nearly fallen asleep, his eyes closed and his breathing slowed, his head felt heavy on my lap. It was soothing, so much I considered going to sleep too, yet when he realized the story was finished he shot up wide awake. «Cool!!!!!» he exclaimed with eyes wide and excited.

«Do you have something cooler?» I challenged and he jumped up with mischief. He seemed to have an ace on his sleeve as he walked away and searched for something his back turned on me. Then he turned around, his hand hid behind his back. He jumped in place excited and smiled slyly before dramatically showing me.

«This!» He stretched his hand to me with pride. Passing me a walkie talkie. It looked old, heavy and funny. I couldn't see anything special about it. What was that he found cool about this old toy? It probably didn’t even work. Of course I had no experience with those, I had ever seen one up close, just from moves, or the back of police cars. The altered voices that came through it always bothered me. 

«Aha... Cool?» I straggled to say something cool failing miserably. He caught up with my confusion immediately. He smiled and leaned closer to tell me a secret, sitting beside me on the bed.

«It's not a toy. It's Mister Dennis', he doesn't know I got it.» He whispered slyly like it was his biggest of secrets. «You can hear people and they don't even know you're listening.» He said and I paused in shock. It couldn't be. Yet it probably was. It wasn't a way out. But I could communicate with someone who'd help. I had a chance. Not to escape. But to bring some help here.

"It is real? Like working? Can we use it?" Carlotta asked sharply by my side, I ignored her. I should had been happy about having a possible chance of calling for help. Yet that very chance I dreaded.

«Can you show me?» I asked breathless, and with a smile of pure innocence he turned it on. Knowing what that meant, I immediately pulled my hands away from the Wheel. I had a chance. But a child would be betrayed and hurt. And we'd probably get more hurt when Patricia or Dennis took over. But that wasn't the problem was it? Getting hurt had never been the problem. Getting hurt didn't matter, as long as I didn't hurt others. ' _Don't be like him. He hurts others to save himself from the pain. Don't ever be like him.'_

With the most bitter taste in my mouth I handed the wheel over to Carlotta. She was kind enough to block me out. She didn’t force me to watch the betrayal we committed. 

She had enough mercy to not remind how in the end I inevitably walk on my father’s shoes.

**Carlotta**

"This is real?" I asked leaning closer to the glass as Coral asked him to show her. I couldn't hear what he said now, but I could clearly see Coral's guilty expression as she opened her pretty mouth to tell me she was backing out again. Just to close it again and with the most pathetic pained expression give me the Wheel. The moment I had control of the Bus I blocked them out. No way I would let my idiot brother or Caroline stop me. They lacked the gut to get us out. Not me. Not this time. 

The kid hadn't suspected shit. He wouldn't, we had given him no clues. So pretending to be Coral once again, I used my sweeter voice, mimicking her naturally soft as honey tone to ask him the walkie talkie. «Can I?» This naive little kid just gave it to me. Curious about what I'd do but not knowing that unlike Coral, I knew how to use it.

«Don't press that.» He tried to say as I pressed the PPT button. Receiving the immediate response from a stranger that probably was somewhere near. Kid said Dennis-man worked in Zoo and we were one, so we had to at least assume we were underneath one. 

«Don't talk.» Hedwig mouthed at me but I ignored him. I was well aware that as soon as I started talking he'd attack me, or bring someone else to do for him. So I paused, working quickly to the information necessary for them to locate us and to know where we were. Assuming this was their own walkie talkie, and I was speaking with someone working here, I'd only need to tell my name, to call the police and a description of the corridors. 

_«Hello?»_ The man called again and I took a deep a breath before blurting out as much as I could before the chaos exploded. 

«Hello! My name is Coraline Clacher, I have been abducted with three other girls!» I screamed in one breath on the walkie, and the rest happened in such a speed that I later failed to recall details. The kid looked like the sky had fallen on its head. And a few milliseconds felt like eternity. 

«No! I'm gonna slap you.» The kid screamed, throwing himself at me in a desperate attempt to take the walkie from me. 'There we go.' I though to myself as the relatively familiar violence unfolded. He had grabbed my leg and pulled it close as I pulled away, nearly falling off the bed. With my free leg I landed the strongest kick I could, missing his face and landing it on his shoulder. He fell back, but not as far as I expected or wanted. Nether the less I fell and landed on the floor, crawling miserably away from the panicked kiddo who fell on me without being shook down at all from my kick.

_«Who the hell is this?»_ The man questioned confused as hell. The walkie was knocked off my hands and I stretched to reach it again. Hedwig on top of me, trying to restrain me but lacking both the full strength and method. If it wasn't for the size, and the injured leg, we'd have run away much earlier.

«You lied! You promised you wouldn't!» He screamed with tears on his eyes as he tried to reach the walkie too.

«No sweety, that was Coraline. She's not here now, I am.» I told him and for a moment he relaxed his grip shocked. Pulling his body a bit back, my legs finally free to move. His expression was the most satisfying thing I had seen in a while. Coraline would had scold me for liking it but I could help it at all. 

«W-What?» He trembled, not confused just shocked. He probably had put two and two together by now. I took advantage of his shock anyway. I mean, if I could not play dirty how would I ever win? Kid or not, he was a man, and he had a specific weak spot, one that was very close to my knee. Which raised with force. He fell next to me, groaning in pain, more tears running down. I grabbed the walkie again.

_«Okay, Betty, listen. Tell Larry and Fish I said hi. Tell him I still got his orange headphones.»_ The man sighed thinking this was a prank and I resisted the urge to curse the shit outta him. "THIS IDIOT!" I screamed inside the Bus, for my bad luck. From any motherfucker I could had spoken with, it had to be this one. I told myself not to curse, it wasn't Coral like at all. But still I stared at the walkie cursing my luck. _«Hello?»_

«Call the police! Coraline Clacher, Claire Benoit, Casey, and Marcia! We are held in a basement somewhere near! There are pipes and lockers in some part of the tunnels. There was a large cat in a cage!» I gave the names and the most accurate description I could give in this state and speed. My voice two octaves higher, and freaking loud. Still it didn't shake him at all. «He's going to kill us! Please! Send help!» I begged but I had dropped the murder threat too late. Better later than never, but still it didn't affect him like I'd like. Groaning I sat up in the farthest corner of the room.

_«Wait, who is this? And how did you get one of our walkies?»_   
'Right... So much for getting help. Why on the universe, did it have to be THAT STUPID MOTHERFUCKER ON THE FUCKING LINE?' Last breath and last chance as I watched Hedwig tremble and a new set of eyes landing on me. Creepy lady was back. I was not a scared little girl, but I knew this bitch should scare me at least a bit.

«Please help us.» I repeated in the walkie for the last time before it was taken from my hands with a strong yet delicate movement. I watched her turn it off and with light steps, putting it on the furniture on the other side of the room, like I couldn't reach there. I could. I just wouldn't this lady's eye sparkled dangerously.

«Put your hands together in contrition.» She requested lightly. Like she wasn't upset at all. We both knew better. Still I had to laugh at what she had just asked of me. Right. Let's pray for my immortal soul, or should I say souls? God shall save the sinners? I knew all about that motherfucker. Spent my childhood praying on him, while my parents beat the shit out of me. I went to his house, with other idiots, praying for my soul, up until the moment I fucked the priest on the alter. 

«Go fuck yourself lady.» I laughed at her face and even though she was a bit taken aback from the cursing, she wasn't upset still. «I don't pray or beg. You least of all.» I told her, not losing confidence, despite the fact I was sitting on the floor and she was leaning above me. Had the Dennis-Man been in control right now, this situation would have gone a very different way, considering I was not far from belt height. Much to my surprise, she was cool with my response.

«And what would your name be?» She asked and I thought for a moment to give her Coral's name, just to mess around a bit. Upset her a bit more, see if she'd kill me or not. See how much frustration she could take from me, seeing how Carol had been slapped quite easily. Perhaps it would be nice, she clearly was a top, a controlling one at that. I gave her my name anyway.

«Carlotta.» I smiled widely, showing off teeth. Doctor Fletcher had pointed out once, how she told us apart from smiles. Apparently no one else on the Bus showed off their teeth when they smiled.

«Carlotta.» She repeated. «May I have a word with Coraline?» She asked politely. British accent, British behavior, how come and the Professor disliked her? They were one and the same. Even the murderous tendencies that the Professor wouldn't admit. They were the fucking same persona.

«She's unavailable.» I said without thinking.

«Asleep?» She questioned disappointed. 

«Blocked.» I corrected sweetly. «She has taken a liking in you, she might defend you. But she's not your enemy. I am. And so are the rest of us.» I repeated her words which she immediately recognized. A small grin appeared on her face and she leaned in.

«Come on, there must be someone else.» She pressed curious, playfully. Was this supposed to make me uncomfortable? I couldn't see it at all. Coral might had this phobia about touching but I was so on about random sex. Not the most ideal situation to thing of such things, but hey, he was really hot and I didn't mind the lady in control. So I played along. Promising myself I wouldn't do shit without telling Coral first. 

«Rocky didn't get a vote.» I teased, coming closer. 

«And Rocky is?»

«The dog.»I shrugged and her little bitchy smile faltered away. That's right, her fucking facade was not untouchable. ‘Come on Lady, how much does it take to earn a hit from you?’

«You and Jade would get along just fine.» She commented, pulling away.

«I think so too.» I agreed with a smile, immediately recalling the girl who was the most excited to meet us. Yeah, she seemed like a brave girly, like Coral, no much dark ulterior motives to play around. A nice edgy bitch like me to hang around with. 

«May I speak with someone more civilized, please?» Of course I could had refused, told her that I wasn't going down that easily. But I only lifted the block, and told her to hold on a bit as I fetched my bro.

**Carlos**

When the block fell again, my sister had the most satisfied smile on her face. Coral and I jumped up as she walked towards us with swinging hips. "Your turn  bro ." She smiled and jumped to a seat, placing her legs to the seat in front of her,  typically satisfied and unbothered by the mess she had obviously created.

"What did you do?" Coral questioned panicked and my twin shrugged carelessly. 

"What you wouldn't." She said with confidence and grinned. "Don't worry, he's not hurt. More like shocked from the reveal." I heard her  hint as me and Coral walked up to the Driver's seat and I sat down to drive.  I wasn’t even surprised she had given us out like that. She had privately expressed her desire to do so before after all. Coral's hand touched my  shoulder lightly, requesting my attention. I turned to look at her.

"Don't block me, please." Coral asked me, looking slightly anxious like she actually thought I would. "I want to see." I wouldn’t. The fact my sister had in the first place was wrong too. 

I greeted  her by lowering my head with respect to the (probably) older woman.  Who curiously  «And you would be?»

«Carlos, miss.» I responded shortly, I sounded more like a soldier at the moment than I planned but that wasn't  necessarily a bad thing. She was dealing with someone cold. Which was obviously a problem to her.  A big change over my sister’s overheated character to my disciplined manners. It threw her off guard. It was a method often used in the police too, they played good cop, bad cop to get such disorientation and use it to their advantage. 

«Carlos. Is Coraline available?» She questioned and I looked up to Coral who shook her head. She didn't want to talk to her. And to be honest, even if she did, I wouldn't let her. She wasn't really trustworthy when it came to this lady apparently.  I knew why,  I shared the feeling, but I could use logic first too.

«She's listening. But I am not letting her Drive.» I said  mechanically and Patricia gave a short understanding nod. She motioned to the door with one hand, like an invite for us to walk out.

«Shall we move to the kitchen?» She suggested. She sounded like a housewife, a proper lady of the house. Inviting me to the kitchen for some tea, for us to converse  peacefully. For her to get me to drop my defenses and speak more comfortably. Little did I know she would achieve it eventually.

«If you wish.» I shrugged and pushed myself up, something that was proved much harder than expected as the injured leg nearly got me falling down again after putting the slightest pressure on it.  How had Coral managed to cover such distance before?

«May I ask how you came to be?» She asked as we exited the room. She walked slowly next to me, patiently waiting for me to follow her.

«How most of the alters come to be?» I asked  rhetorically. «I was needed, and I came.»

«Father or mother?» She questioned, and I resisted the urge to change the subject by pointing out it could be almost anyone that had created a trauma to a child. Even someone outside the family.

« Male .» I responded quickly,  refusing to go into details. I straggled to catch up with her, grabbing the wall to hold on, so I wouldn't fall down the stairs. Coral's leg would make it hard to go down, but I was positive I could make it. It was nothing much, but it hurt like hell from the lack of proper treatment. She had claimed it was just a sprained ankle but I started to think it was more  like a fracture. 

«It was the mother for us. Kevin couldn't take it. He has been asleep for very long now.» She said taking one arm and putting in around her neck for me to hold on to. I was surprised but I didn't resist. There was no point or reason to decline this extra help. «Coraline looks in better shape.» She commented helping down the stairs.

«She has been taken care of. She healed herself almost fully.» 

«Lucky girl.» She paused before adding.«But unprotected from the cruel world and people.» Her tone was asking for a response and I gave her one. How could I refuse anyway. Like my sister's brother, I had to clarify what she failed to take into account.

«Do you count yourself among those cruel people?» I asked her. Of course she never answered. Who would ever admit they were to commit a crime and that they had fallen low. «She has us. She is as protected as she needs to be.» I looked up to the closed doors behind which the other girls where being held captives. «Unlike those girls.» I sighed. Coral had us, she was confident she wasn't alone. She was confident she was protected, and safe, even if she wasn't truly. Those girls were probably alone and terrified.

«Those girls don't know what pain is. They ar e in no need of protection.  Others need to be protected by them. They are impure. Unbroken.» Her tone was absolute and her voice steady, filled, overcome by certainty.

«How do you know?» We reached the bottom of the stairs but she still didn't let go. She helped us move through the corridor and into the kitchen were she helped me sit down lightly replying.

«We watched them. The Beast had chosen them when they played that prank on us, a few weeks ago.» So this was personal. They had somehow offended them and this was a small revenge with the perk of it being a sacrifice for her Beast.

«What is he supposed to do anyway?» I questioned with a challenging tone. I didn't believe he was anything special, whatever he could do, so could probably someone else, someone who'd cause less damage. I was so ready to have this argument about how he wasn't important, yet the conversation took a whole other direction later on. She pushed the chair closer to the table as she walked to the kitchen with swaying hips. It wasn't hard to tell she was uncomfortable in the sport cloths Hedwig had been wearing, still she wouldn't leave us alone to go and change.

«Protect us. Prove to the world that we exist.» She answered lightly and confidently, like a priestess speaking for her Gods achievements and powers. Then the subject changed. «It makes sense, you know. You didn't doubt us, or him. I heard the others, they though we were playing games on them.» Somehow there was  appreciation it there. She thought that the fact we didn't doubted them out loud, as a good thing. Were they really, so insecure about people doubting their  existence ?

«You do. Just not the games they thought.» I pointed out. Where the girls thought the personalities were a game to freak them out, an act to shake them and scare them, the true game lied on Patricia's  controlled nature and mind games. 

«Are all of you that smart in there?» She turned and smiled with a pleasantly surprised look. I looked through the rear view mirror, Carlotta resting her legs, the Professor crossing hers, both watching the conversation. Patricia didn't wait for an answer, she only raised her eyebrows and nodded. «I bet you are.» She said as her back turned around, I swear I could hear a smile on her voice. «Only the broken understand and accept. So only they will remain standing.»

«There are people who also understand and accept, even though they have known no pain.»

«They are weak. They don't know how to survive, they are asleep. Into their screens, wasting away their lives.» She dismissed me, with a flip of her wrist. She truly thought so little of the world. How arrogant of her to think she could fix it by spilling more blood. «They have no purpose.»

«You don't know that.» I argued. Because she didn't. She couldn't possibly do. Those girls had to have goals for their li v es, they had to have little perks that could bloom under the right circumstances. She and her Beast had no right to take that chance from them.«Weakness is not related with pain.» I told her with certainty. Certainty that was about to be shattered. «Coraline is taking stupid risks every minute she is here. It's not because she hasn't suffered enough.» God knows she had and we had suffered with her.

«I admit it wasn't very smart of her to hurt her leg. But apart from that, she is the only one who has nearly escaped us with such success.» She chuckled taking out two small plates and teacups from the cupboard. 'That's right, give her more confidence and reasons not to try and escape her captor and possible killer.' I glanced up to Coral who had a small smile on her face, like I expected. She had been flattered by the  recognition of her nearly victory, only she failed to take into account it was Team job.

«Her survival  instincts are  completely turned off.» I judged, Coral turning to look at me surprised. Much to my  surprise , her small smile widened into an impressed grin. «If they were ever on that is.» That didn't shook her either, if anything it made laugh lightly, not  offended at all by my  suggestion of her stupidity.

«Maybe she is not as healed as you thought then.» Patricia suggested taking the pot that rested on the kitchen and se r ving the two cups.

«Oh, she is healed. It is not a sui c idal tendency. It is her morality about forgiving and not hurting others.» She sat down, facing me, placing two cups of tea on the table, laughing at me.

«That is far from bad, Carlos.» She mussed dropping some lemon in her tea. «Unbroken people don't even reach that point. They hurt others without reason, or care. Broken people know why not to hurt others.» She took a sip before dropping a few drops more. «War and death always bring out the best of people, but somehow peace seems to get out the worst of them.» It was these words that hit me straight to the heart. It was these words that made me rethink my morality, and theories on this woman. She noticed my hesitation immediat e ly. «You know what I mean don't you?» She purred taking a sip from her tea, without breaking eye contact.

«I do. But this  isn 't be the way.» I shook my head in denial. She was right, but I didn't want her to be. I didn't want to be the hypocrite who hurt a few to save the many. I also doubted there was ever a way we'd ever save everyone. Sometimes you have to make sacrifices to get a better result. 

«Someone has to do something. And only the Beast is strong enough to guide them.» Her voice was soft as she placed her hand on mine, surp ri sing me again. Looking up to her, I realized she didn't really saw me. I was the soldier. She saw the girl. Yet she spoke with me, using war tactics and mind tricks that wouldn't be nec es s ary to Coral. «Stand by our side Carlos.»

«The girls-»

«There shall always be crossfire victims. Some of them might even deserve it.» I hated how her words mimicked things I had said to Coral myself. Patricia hadn't been there to listen, but somehow she knew exactly how to convince me. «In the end, it's for the best. We shall evolve and change.» I hated how I agreed with everything she suggested, and how the only thing holding me back was Coral and the rest. Patricia sat back, taking a sip from her tea, shut t ing her eyes and enjoying it. «In the sun, we will find our passion. In the sun, we will find our purpose.»She said as if it was a prayer. I didn't understood it but I let her say her poem. «I read that on a sympathy card once. It was for funerals, but I thought it was beautiful.» She explained, eyes still shut as she drank some tea more. «We need to burn, in order to know what our purpose is.» 

«You say he can save the world.» I begun, looking down to my untouched cup of tea. «Who is gonna save the world from him?» At what cost would the world be saved. Was it worth it? Would he truly bring all of this and settle it, was really a man enough to do such thing?

«When he has finished with them, they will be strong enough to save themselves.» And again, I understood exactly her point. No matter how inhuman it was, I knew first hand that the majority of people who have suffered, know when and how to prevent themselves from suffering again, and/or hurting others. «We are what we believe we are. Only the ones in pain know how powerful they truly are.» «Take your time, think about it.» She nodded, like there was actual time to think about all of this. We barely had a few hours. When spoke again, she didn't spoke to me. She looked straight to my eyes, as if she could see us all inside the Bus and smiled. «He will come to you, Coraline, and you shall give him an answer.»

«Coraline?» I questioned slightly taken aback. She had tried so hard to convince me but she was somehow certain I was positive to her methods? I didn't really thought I would manage to convince her for all of this anyway. I saw their point, but I was one, against three women with much more power than I. 

«She's the broken, you are only there for her.» Patricia explained finishing her tea and getti n g up.


	12. Chapter 12

**Coraline**

Dennis took over after Patricia finished her tea, and led us back at our cell. I let Carlos drive with him, the proud silent duo walking down the corridor with straight backs and chins kept high. Perhaps equally dangerous strangers, with similar purposes; to protect. When we entered the room, Carlos gave me the Wheel and I turned to Dennis who twisted the keys on the lock, noticing something. «Can you tell Hedwig I'm sorry?» I asked, voice low  praying not to provoke him in any way . His eyes flew to mine for a split second, confusion on his features.  Guilt was eating me up, burning me and pressing me.  _A fucking liar._ Hedwig was a kid.  _A lying bitch._ He didn’t deserve to be tricked like that.

«Will do. » He agreed, kneeling to check the damage I had done at the door, while breaking out. I sat at the bed, patiently waiting for him to finish his job, twisting my fingers and looking at the floor, avoiding to look up to the stoic man,  out of fear he might get ideas .  I was, after all, sitting on a bed like a obedient little doll. He was tense, his gaze examining the lock with concentration. «You are the girl...» He trailed off, trying to recall my name, like Patricia hadn't repeated countless times so far. She almost seemed to like to pronounce it, to say it. «Coraline...?» He tried uncertain and I nodded biting my lip.  His voice, tone and accent were completely different than the way Patricia spoke it. A whole different word, with a whole other meaning.

«The others?» He  questioned and  not knowing whether it was safe to answer him I kept silent for a while. How much more of a threat could he be  right now, at this moment ?  H e was obviously sexually active, removing clothes and trying to make us dance, he was about to have us killed.

«A breath away. » I glanced at Carlos with meaning, he was watching but hadn’t attempted to take my control yet. I had blocked sounds from the Bus, letting them know what I was doing but keeping them out to speak with him without interference. Not my wisest choice, I realized as Dennis stared at me. Examining me like he had examined the lock. «You don't want people to die either, right?» I asked hesitantly, not sure if I had to expect a violent reaction or not. _Keep that pretty mouth shut._

«Kevin needs protection. Only the Beast can protect him.» He announced and part of me felt like listening to a poem learned by heart. Words repeated and dull. Yet well learned and believed. «And he will protect you too. You are broken and pure. It's for the best.» He concluded with a nod, almost like he tried to convince himself about it. He did a very poor job convincing anyone though. 

«You don't believe that. That the end justifies the means.» 

«You don't get a choice here girl.» He sighed somewhat tired, his voice a bit harder. I could tell I was pressing sensitive buttons and he was getting annoyed. He got up placing the keys at the door. He looked down to me and  I up to him, and for the first in forever, I didn't fe e l vulnerable, I saw him fight something in himself and I felt confident. I was right, and he knew it.  It was poisonous, to know I had power over him, that my words mattered. It filled me with confidence.  False confidence that would get me punished and hurt.

«I know I don't. But you do.» 

«I have made mine.» He declared finally  after a long painful silence .  He sounded defeated.  Then his eyes landed on my shirt and pants and his face was filled with disgust. «Your clothes are dirty. Take them-» He hurried to tell me but paused looking to my al a r m ed face.  My eyes  following his hands, that seemed to me to try and reach out for me.  I knew what he'd say. He'd ask me to remove the clothes  and he might even take action and remove them himself . Even I could feel the dust and the dirt on them after falling down so many times. But I still didn't want to remove the layers that prevented the unwanted staring of the hungry eyes. I didn’t want him to see, to look. I didn’t want to face the consequences of my actions if I took the fabrics off.  I wouldn’t even blame him if he did. He wanted it, holding back would only make it  more painful for me afterwards. He straggled before sighing. «I'll sent Patricia to get you something clean to wear.» He said at last, getting out, locking the door behind him. I remained in place, too surprise to say something about it.

"You cool?" Carlotta as soon as I lifted the block and  mumbled at her .

“It can’t be that simple.” I said. “He can’t possibly strangle like that and not at least hit me or something.” In response she simply placed her hand to my shoulder and pressed. “What is he gonna do, Carlotta?” Sighing I leaned back and looked out of the window, pretty crimson fields greeting me. Killing me was not cruel enough. My mind wondered in the possibilities and the scenarios of my clothes being forcefully removed from me. The idea of his raw strength twisting my hand behind my back while I cried and strangled to escape. The sound a bone breaking, and the sharp pain. It all sounded a bit familiar.

Stop thinking. It won’t help you when he decides to hurt you.

"That's all on you, you know." Carol said, poison dripping from her voice. Confused at turned at them, to find Caroline give Carlotta a nasty look of annoyance, and pity. The electricity on the air piercing through me. She was asking for a fight.  A fight I didn’t want to witness at the moment. But then again, my opinion hardly mattered.

"Excuse me?" Carlotta laughed at her, taken aback. 

"Why did you have to tell them about us? You could had left them in ignorance!" She scold her in a low tone that raised with every word. She had just finished a cigarette but immediately she pulled out of her packet a new one, opening the window and looking for her lighter. She was upset, more than usual, which was normal considering we had lost a very good chance of getting out.  But not considering how  quickly her temper could rise an d fall and how I needed to leave the Bus. 

"It shocked him long enough for me to use the walkie talkie! Plus! We won't get killed now." Carlotta shrugged with pride and no care. Carol's nails hit the glass of the window in a quick beat impatiently, matching the beat of her foot. 

"What about the girls you idiot!?" Carol hissed at her but Carlotta only rolled her eyes. Apparently I had special treatment for being 'broken and pure' but I doubted they'd let us go that easily. We knew too much, if we escaped we'd bring the cops straight here, and after the crime was done I wasn't sure we'd still be allowed to leave. 

How would that even work?

Who am I kidding?  _Excellentl_ _y_ . I thought how easy it would be, for them to keep me under control. I knew myself well enough, I fell into patterns of others easily.  Not with the fear of Dennis attacking,  I’d never  even attempt a physical attack on them .  Co nsidering how well I  could and  had settled in here, that would not necessarily be a problem even though it should be. 

"We'll get them out!" Carlotta yelled at her, like it was no big deal which of course, Carol found idiotic of her.

"We don't have time!" Carol yelled back.

"And that is my fault?" She laughed with disbelief. "I had a chance an I took it!"

"Guys..." I mumbled weakly, trying to calm the spirits, only to be ignored as Carol kept blaming Carlotta for things that barely were her fault. Why was she being like this? I could understand her sudden anger but not they way she exploded like this. Yes we had missed a chance, but there wasn't that much hope anyway. Why take it out on Carlotta. She had done what she could, I hadn't exactly helped her anyway. I kept the Wheel to myself all the way, pretending I knew what I was doing, only pulling us deeper into the pit.

"Ladies please-" Carlos attempted to tell them, understanding they were upsetting me.

"AND YOU!" Carol turned sharply at Carlos who froze mid-sentence, knowing he had fucked up. "Did you really fall for her promises of glory?! She has a cult obsession! She's out of her mind!" She screamed at his face, Carlos becoming more and more defensive with every word that left her lips. "But of course! You miss the war don't you?" She asked poison dripping from her voice. "You're just like them, longing for a purpose! You are the one who brought us here in the first place!" 

"We were kidnapped!" Carlos exclaimed in defense. Having been asleep at the time, I wasn't aware of the opportunities we had missed to be able to defend him but as far as I knew he would never purposely put me in harm's way. So I was positive Carol was just being mean like usually when she was angry.

"You could had run out! So many opportunities!"

"Why didn't you, huh?" Carlos backfired the blame, hands folding on his chest. "What is  _your_ purpose here?"

"To comfort Coral when you upset her apparently!" She growled at him, hitting exactly were he hurt. She was going to far, and I wasn't sure she realized, being so angry like she was. For all I knew, she could regret her own words later on.

"Stop." My voice was drowned in Carol's raised voice, never reaching anyone's ears. 

"I could have seen you in many roles with Coral, Carlos but the last thing I thought you'd be is an abuser!" She screamed at the top of her lungs, and I watched Carlos' face flintch with pain. I knew he had regreted his words, I had forgiven him, but I wasn't sure he forgave himself for losing his cool and telling the things he said.

"Says the woman who attacked Coral's father with a kitchen's knife!" Carlotta scoffed at her, rolling her eyes. I paused confused. I didn't remember that. Well, that wasn't strange, I didn't remember half my life. But why had no one told me about that? I frowned at Carol but she wasn't looking at me. I knew she was equally murderous with Patricia, but I had never realized she had acted like that through me.

"That bastard had it coming! He wouldn't be my first man to kill! Some of them just need to go down! Don't patronize me about it!" She screamed at her and her words sank painfully heavy.  I don’t know why I didn’t quite felt hurt, or shocked or something among the lines.  I don't know why I was  not surprised, she had never talked too much of her past, she had constantly reminded me that she had sinned in the most horrible ways. Admitting it out loud  made no difference when somewhere in the back of my mind I was aware of the fact. 

"And you are to choose?!" Carlos yelled at her with disbelief. "How are you different from that Beast?! From her father?!"

"In no way!" She admitted with passion. Almost like she was proud of it. "Not a single one, but the self control!" 

"Carol stop please." I asked louder but no one minded me. They were all to busy fighting. I  And I was too small to pause their anger. I didn't want to leave them fighting. I just wanted everyone to take a break and calm down. But that didn't seem anywhere near. Why didn't they  blamed me for anything? I was the one I had gotten attached. I was the one that kept them back at every possible decision. Why did they blame each other? I should be the  villain here, not them.  Why were they not angry at me?

"Can you say the same?" Carol barged at Carlos, smiling with arrogance, daring him. "You went to war only to release this anger didn't you? To enjoy the blameless thrill of killing!" I saw the pain flash through Carlos' eyes, I almost felt it. Of all things she could blame him for, she chose to call him and practical murderer. It wasn't the insult that hurt him though, it was the fact he feared it was true. Because he had confessed to me before, that his anger scared him, and he wasn't sure how it affected his actions  unconsciously. "Same goes for you lady." Carol turned to Carlotta with a low cold tone. "You will never admit it but there is no way this urges to kill of yours haven't snapped at some point."

"They are about to, that's certain." Carlotta growled, her hand trembling dangerously. I knew she wouldn't hesitate, she would attack her without a glimpse of remorse. That was just Carlotta, I knew first hand she could be violent if pushed too far. Carol knew it too, but she seemed to actually want to push her off her edge.

"Bring it in. I am not going down alone." She smirked.

«STOP IT!» I screamed punching the horn. My voice ringing in both the Bus and the empty room around me. They all stopped and the silence that filled the Bus was paranormal. For a moment I kept quiet, letting it all sink in, looking for the right words, for the right tone. I didn't find anything fitting. "...Stop fighting...please..." I begged tears streaming down my cheeks.

{...}

The sound of the door unlocking pulled me out of my thoughts. I was lying in one bed, looking at the wooden board that prevented a possible exit. At the sound of the jingling keys I punched my self to sit up and turned to see my visitor. «Coraline. I heard you're back out.» Patrica chipped walking inside. She held a white fabric which I assumed were clothes for me. «Dennis is upset about your clothes. I brought you something clean and pretty to wear.» She said, unfolding the fabric, to reveal a simple long sleeveless white dress.

I stared at it for a while trying not to notice the irony of the color of innocence and the unpractical nature of it. White was a much easier color to stain. Not meaning to be rude I thanked her quietly reaching out for it but the moment I did she pulled it away, eyes darkening. «You should take a bath first.» She told me and I couldn't help but take a few steps back at how low her voice was. Swallowed hard, nodding weakly and limping away, as I turned to close the door, I watched her softly lay the dress to one of the beds. And before closing it, I heard her call out and tell me to get the clothes outside the door for her to throw away and remind me to wash the hair too.

If it wasn’t Patricia in control I’d have locked before undressing and throwing the clothes out. But seeing she was a lady and a woman, I saw no reason to. Neither when I bathed. A bath I seemed to desperately need, even though I didn’t know. The warm water changed color after sliding away from my skin, and the warmness melted away some of the worries.  I was glad about the fogged mirror that prevented me from taking a glance of my own marked skin. It was yet another worry off my shoulders. They all however returned when I stepped out,  one  towel around my body and  one around my shoulders and under my  wet hair, to find Patricia patiently waiting to the other bed. She smiled sweetly as she rose to greet me and I took half a step back. “Let me help you, it’s just us girls here.”  She said, something bitter coming up from my throat to my mouth. I refused to believe she was offering to help me dress, like I was some sort of a child. Her sinister smile suggested otherwise of course, she knew I was no child. Yet she waited patiently for me to  drop the towel . 

Slightly alerted I turned to my Passengers who looked at her equally frowned with me. The moment I turned to look at him, Carlos shot up and walked next to me, squeezing my should with comfort. «I'd rather I went in the bathroom.» I tried telling her. She only smiled.

«You'd strangle with this leg. I'll help.» She insisted with a tone that didn't let me choices. Without even thinking, I grabbed Carlos' hand and placed it to the Wheel, switching places with him. I was no coward but I doubted I had the slightest bit of courage to do this. I didn't want to remove clothing under the preying eyes of a man ever again, even if it was not a man in control. Bare skin was always a trigger for men. For all I knew, Dennis would pop out the minute  the towel was of f, and I didn't want to be there if that happened.  He could even be watching right now, hidden behind her.  I stayed with him, though watching but ready to flee to the further back any moment.

«Miss, I appreciate the concern but that's far from helping.» Carlos told her coldly and Patricia's face immediately darkened, something angry shifting in her eyes.

«Raped then. » She concluded, smile always on her lips, fooling anyone who wasn't paying attention. «I am no Dennis. A bare body doesn't affect me.  Just as your opinion doesn’t. She’ll have to dress sooner or later, and I am a patient woman. » 

Carlos hadn't turned to look at me, yet he seemed to sense my thought on it, he seemed to know I was considering the improper offer of the lady alter,  bowing to her will since I could hardly get out of this.  «You have a way with words miss Patricia. Steady arguments.  But you seem to lack respect for one’s privacy. » He told her darkly, disliking the fact I was even thinking it through. Skeptical, I touched the Wheel.  There was no privacy here, we were prisoners. I’d be lucky to only have this demand to obey. «I trust no one is watching?» I asked her, my soft tone mixing with Carlos' cold one, having a result that sounded fairly unnatural. Patricia scoffed, lightly offended. 

«Have some trust, dear.» 

«To you? Why should we?» Carlos asked slightly irritated and I asked more quietly after him. «What do you get out of such thing?» I really couldn't see it. If not a  glimpse of skin, what was there to see in a naked  and dis-morphed body. Patricia seemed glad to provide an answer although it felt almost rude to admit it so casually.

«A backstory check.» Came her answer and I cocked my head puzzled before it dawned at me. 

«Scars? Is that what you're looking for?» I  asked surprised, Carlos adding. «Bruises fade.» Taking the risk, I motioned for Carlos to get up. They had resisted Marcia's naked bottom, my body was nothing, especially if she truly only wanted to see what scars I had, for whatever reason. I couldn't help my anxiety but I kept telling myself that Patricia was a woman of her word, and prayed I wasn't just being naive. Thankfully he didn't refuse to let me drive. He allowed me to take control and risk it, staying by my side anyway.

«People like them are rarely careful about marks dear.» She said as Carlos got up with a sigh of defeat and I took over again. Much to my surprise, the moment I regained full control, Patricia seemed to recognize me immediately. Her head falling to the side, the sides of her lips curling up. «There you are.» She breathed acknowledging my presence. Looking away, I sat at the bed, pulled the towel off my shoulders and allowed her to take it off my hands and help me dry, as much as she could, my hair. I didn't dare to look at her while I was waiting for her to do so, I was busy reminding myself how to control my anxiety and breath steadily and deeply and failing at both. When she was done and the other towel was softly removed from me, I was both proud of myself for making it so far, and also nautious because I was terrified. 

It took all I had to look up to Patricia, nails digging my thigh, grabbed on it like my life depended on it. My knees almost failed when stood up and I looked at her face and found nothing but pride, a kind smile and an impressed expression on her face. I  even  started  to cry silently with shame, and terror when I saw her happy smile while her eyes moved over my naked body. I didn’t however move to hide myself, out of fear of her initiating contact to prevent me from doing so.  «Does that satisfy you?» I was meaning to sound sharp, strong, confident, to show her I had scars and I was proud of them. Instead my voice was a  mix of  broken whisper  and hurt sob. Her eyes wouldn't leave my stomach, I wouldn't try to hide the wide scar that made its way across it covering it like an ugly tattoo. I couldn't tell whether she was sad or happy when looking at it. But I could swear I saw a glimpse of pride when her eyes traveled to my shoulder where a burned  line traveled down to my elbow.

She offered the white dress with the most honest of smiles she had given me so far. « Let’s p ut it on. I ironed it for you.» She said softly and I broke down unintentionally. Hand to my mouth to cover it, hoping to prevent the sobs from escaping, tears falling in streams blurring my vision of the woman. Oh, the relief I felt at that moment was not compered to anything I had experienced so far. Carlos was hugging me inside the Bus. Somewhere behind him I noticed the steps of my Passengers hurrying to see if I was alright. And if I was to be honest,  I was far from it. I couldn’t bring myself to realize, she was offering me to hide myself again. She hadn’t let out Dennis yet, she wasn’t even repelled by the sight. Non of the things I thought I’d see were there.  Almost like copying Carlos' movement, Patricia placed the dress on the bed and stepped closer very carefully, almost like she was afraid, she pulled me in an embrace which I returned with the same timidity,  relief creeping into my core when her hands didn’t wonder on my lower body, chest or naked back. Somewhere between my sobs I started thanking  and apologizing to  her and she shushed me quietly.

When I eventually stopped and relaxed, I had melted into her embrace, my cold bare skin warming up against her cotton clothes and the warmth of her body. She was the first one to pull away, and pick the dress from the bed. I didn't resist as she helped me put it on. I even held my hair up for her to zip it, all of it without a single bracing of our skins, something for which I was thankful. The Twins and Carol hadn't spoke a word. They stood next to me staring but didn't do anything else. They simply stared. Not at Patricia. At me. They stood and watched me drive with something that could resemble horror on their faces, and somehow that made me more uncomfortable than Patricia dressing me up like a doll. «It seems that it is true.» Patricia said as I turned around to face her. I had no idea what I was feeling now that the relief had washed off, but it wasn't fear and it wasn't comfort. I didn't know what she saw on my face but I didn't care. Something inside me had settled, and I didn't wish to pretend I wasn't at peace at the moment. 

She tangled her fingers in my hair, like she had done so many times before and leaned closer, a mix of  confusion and  worry rushing through my veins once again as she whispered; «It's the prettiest flowers that are cut off.» Seeing my worried  expression she smiled, her eyelids closing, her lips almost touching mine. «Don't worry little one. We'll take care of you now.» With that her lips pressed to mine and  instinctively , my eyes shut closed. Her kiss was nothing like Hedwig's. Hers was more... skilled. Her hand in my hair pulling me closer, tongue lightly caressing my lip, pressing without being harsh. It was an actual kiss. And it felt sweetly gentle. Curious I pushed back, pressing my lips to hers. Then it was over Which might had been good considering I had forgotten to breath.

She smiled on my lips and I opened my eyes slowly to meet hers. She didn't pull away immediately. She stood there for a few moments playing with my hair. Then looking to be in a fairly good mood, she picked up the towels, leaving my shoes and a new pair of socks behind. The spell now broken, and peace gone again, I remembered why this had been wrong. «Please don't kill them.» I asked softly, and with only that, her good mood disappeared. Smile fading away, eyes darkening dangerously with disappointment.

«You can't stop this.» She said shortly like she wanted to put an end to this conversation. I was aware I was tempting fate but I went on anyway, trying  desperately to talk some sense to her. She was a woman of reason, that much I knew, she was just  desperate. She  truly thought killing someone would solve their problems, take away their pain. And to be blinded by such promises, she probably was in so much pain.

«You can. He can. All of you.» 

«And what would we have then? Who'd protect us? Who'd make them believe?»

«Why does it matter what they believe?» I asked quietly but she heard me either way.

«Come on Coraline.» She exclaimed turning sharply, voice raising. She was loosing her cool. Considering her patience, I had entered dangerous waters. «Don't you know what it is like? If not for you then for them.» She walked closer and intimidating aura floating around her, crawling on my skin. «When someone looks them in the eye and tells them they don't exist. They are not needed.» I risked a glance at my Passengers  through the  rear view mirror, some sort of guilt in all of their faces. 

«You prefer to be feared over that? You prefer to kill?» Disgust filled me as I realized she didn't even consider them as people with lives. She only saw enemies. She only saw foes. She was attacking to protect them all. «How are you any better than them? The majority of them was hurt before hurting.» I hurt Hedwig in fear of getting hurt. Carlotta had hurt others because of her parents' rage. Carlos had gone to war for the same reasons. We were all in pain, we didn't have to keep this circle going. 

«And what would you do?» She laughed at me, not realizing I had chosen the other away out of this. Not understanding I was pulling her there to sooth them and not hurt them.

«I'd forgive! I'd rather be hurt than hurt others!» I yelled at her. Why couldn't she see it? There would be more collateral damage if she killed people, they'd all be in pain, they'd all be the same. Her anger fade away as if put out with water. Her face softened and her tense shoulders relaxed, her eyes took me in with adoration. Her sudden change shook me, confused me. Her lovable kind eyes raised shields in me I had  forgotten I had.

«Then you are  truly the purest among us.» She said with sadness. Walking out of the room she pulling out the keys. «Now, forgive us, the less pure. For taking the hard and  bloodshed-ed path.» Her ruthless tone caused my heart to froze with fear. 

«Patricia...» I tried to say weakly. Was this the path we'd walk down to? Death, guilt, blood and stone? Didn't Medusa turned to stone men who hurt her for her beauty? Yet one cut her head off and used it as a weapon. Were we to repeat the story? Would there be myths about us? 

«Sssh...Little one...You'll meet him tonight. You'll understand.» She stopped me with the most smooth and soft tone she had ever used. Comforting me with words that only upset me. «They had their chance to redeem. Now punishment shall fall upon them all. You won't be alone.» 

«Who will I have? They'll all be dead.» They'll even kill you. You'll be hunt down. Wrong or right, if they'd kill three girls who had done nothing wrong people would seek to kill him. Right or wrong, killing them, would cause more damage until either the world understood, or he was dead. And I doubted the world could ever  truly understand anything if people didn't die to prove it. Which was sad, considering it was a dead end either way. I just thought it unfair to be them that died. 

«You'll have us.» She told me with a light, careless tone. «You'll have him.» She added, door closing. I stood there for countless seconds, crying bitter and relieved, and fearful silent tears. I was  overwhelmed with my emotions, sitting back to the bed I got off the Driver's Seat and spran g out of the Bus swiping my tears. I passed by my Passengers without looking at them, not wanting to see whatever disappointment they felt for me. I didn't go to the Farm, I  climbed the small cliff and lied down the poppies  shutting my eyes.

How did I got myself  in such a mess.

I heard Carlos approach long before he sat by my side. He didn't say anything for a while, and I was glad he didn't. Yet, when I was calmer a while later he spoke. "Do you know who she reminds me off?" He asked me and I turned to look at him curious. He looked comfortable, lying at the poppies with me. And for the first time in my life, I realized that he was kind of good looking. I had never noticed what my alters appeared like according to real life  standards. Somehow it was like I was seeing him, for the first time. "Your mom. Only darker." He revealed, leaning back to lie down. "And after that last kiss, much more seductive." He added and I  immediately started  chocked on a laugh . 

"That turned you on?" I asked between my  chuckles . I don't know why it was so funny to me. He was a man, he liked women (as far as I knew) but for the first time he  referred to someone as seductive, and for the first time he spoke to me about his preferences. He motioned with his head towards the Bus where Carlotta and Carol stood chatting.

"Don't tell those two, but mature women always did." He told me  guiltily and I laughed harder. If Carol ever heard she'd never act the same with him. And Carlotta of course would never drop the jokes about him. Sofia would for sure be surprised but I could already imagine her matching him with friends of hers.

"You have one last blade, are you going to try and get out?" He questioned but I  immediately dismissed it telling him she  had locked the door. "Only the outside door." He reminded me. "I mean. That room is full of random staff and Carlotta can unlock doors with almost anything." He said like it wasn't even an  obstacle on our way out. Yet right now, even moving to get in the Bus felt like something hard to do. "Thus the three years in prison." He mumbled to himself and I smirked pretending I didn't hear. Carlotta's prison life was no secret but Carlos avoided to speak of it anyway. Unlike Carlotta who boasted about it.

"In a little bit. " I told him shutting my eyes and mumbling. "Just ten minutes. It's too much." 

I heard him stand up with a defeated sigh and walk away. Not much later, someone else sat my side."I am a hypocrite." I told them. Who ever it was, I wanted to say it  out loud. "We were never a team, never on their side. It was every girl for herself from the start."

"Then why don't you let them die?" Carol questioned carelessly and almost like she didn't care. I knew she did. "You will be spared." 

Why didn't I? I almost did. I run out, leaving them locked in the closets, telling myself they'd get hurt if we'd get caught, which I was eventually. But I had the chance to help, yet I ignored it. It wasn't because I cared, and not because I didn't. I could do like Carlotta proposed, stab the man in the eye, yet I cared enough for the complete stranger to let him walk away with what they were about to do.  Unintentionally , I was allowing innocents to die, because I wanted my hands clean and my  consciousness clear. So why did I chose to save him when I'd kill them, and not hurt him to save them. 

"I don't know." I said lost. I could, I just didn't want to be the one that left people behind, or the one who treated someone who had already hurt, as just a  villain of a story. 

"I do." She offered surprising me. "But you won't like what you'll hear."

"Say it." I asked her. At the moment, I wanted to know. I wanted to know what she knew, I wanted the full picture so I could decide where I should go. I wanted to know what I wanted, because I clearly didn't. I wasn't going to die, but when there was the threat of dying, I wasn't really trying to avoid it. I was too busy setting priorities and acting like I had control over everything.

"You want to have good intentions. Even if you don't actually care." She revealed.

"No way to actually know my intentions. No one would know." I argued. Even if that was true, my  effort had to convince someone, and the girls were no longer here. No blame to take.

"We would. You too." She pointed out."I noticed when we first got in here; You aimed to please  _everyone_ . You think we will dislike you if you let the girls die but we told you to run when you get the chance and to not look back. So you have to at least  pretend you want to help them. You have to tell yourself you do. Or you'll have enemies in your own head." My mind was spinning. It was like a punch after another. Cruel and merciful truth that I refused to admit to myself but I could not hide from others. I was  nauseous. How terrible was that. How much similar to the abuser I so much avoided to be. I lied. I pretended. I didn't care. 

"What about the fact I am not out of here yet? If I  truly wanted out, I wouldn't care for their feelings. Patricia, Hedwig, Dennis, Jade..."  _Kevin_

"You found someone who is like you, someone familiar in a variety of ways." She said and I turned to look at her confused. Immediately picking up to my question she started a detailed explanation "You disliked the safe environment you've been living in since your father got in prison. It's scaring you to be safe. So you know you are with someone dangerous and you are at peace with it. Patricia is familiar. We have all noticed how much like your mother she is, except you mom was much more naive and less of a quiet storm. Hedwig is what you had planned for the future, you have your way with children. On top of those things, you see yourself there because of the D.I.D. and the obviously similar opinions between alters, similarities between all of us... It's the most perfect match you have met so far." 

So it was a  vicious circle. One I didn't desire to escape. I was seeking out violence  unconsciously. She was saying I wanted it, that against all reason it made me feel safe. And though it made sense to think it for others, I didn't want to believe it for myself. I didn't want to be a victim, I didn't want to be the abuser. I wanted to be different. But then again, don't we all? I hadn't hurt anyone, but I hadn't tried to save them either. I was no selfless person like I claimed to be. In the end of the day, I didn't know my limits either. Forgiveness seemed limitless unless it was offered to me, and caring was natural, only it wasn't really.

She paused then added. "Friend, or lover." I shut my eyes  embarrassed. Of course she was  referring to that. With Hedwig, I hardly cared, but Patricia was a whole other story. She was a woman, an adult. I had no idea what that meant and I tried not to give it a meaning at all. Yet instead of acting as if it never happened, it had been brought up twice so far and I doubted Carlotta would miss a chance to mention it too.

"It's unhealthy." I whined, covering my face with my hands. It was wrong in so many levels to find comfort in such  environment. Yet I couldn't help to wish it wasn't. Part of me wanted this to be acceptable and not sick. I didn't want to be sick. Frowning I lied back and looked at the sky. The sun was low, like always. I couldn't tell whether it was rising or setting because it wasn't moving. It was staying in the same place all day every day, giving the sky crimson and golden colors to match the red poppies in the mountains, the autumn leaves of the few trees along the road, the red Bus and the red barn farther away. This color seemed to be all around me, I couldn't escape it. God, how I loved color red. God, how I hated it.

"You are disappointed." She noticed with a laugh. "First step is always denial, Coral." She reminded me as she lied by my side. It didn't help really, I wasn't denying it. I disliked it for not being ideal. I had tried so hard to be the normal kind of girl, the healthy, the ignorant. Yet here I was being so normal and so broken at the same time.

"What am I supposed to do?" I asked her, begging for the guidance she always provided. But she didn't point me to the direction I should take like I wanted her too. Instead she returned the question asking me;

"What do you want to do?"

"Help him, get out, hopefully help the girls too." I listed out, and then realized the way I had  unconsciously confessed my priorities too. Somehow, helping him seemed to be a top priority.

"You can't help them if they don't want your help. But it is clear they might be  interested in your company." I doubted they did. I was alright with myself being confused, thinking I had a crush on him, for all the reason she had mentioned plus the fact I was younger. He looked older, he had probably a much better hold on his life, no need to think of me in any way. He-They had a purpose, even if it was not a very lawful one, they had no time for the care I craved for. Perhaps I was even attracted to the broken kind. Perhaps I wanted someone to fix. Maybe I was that kind of an abuser.

"Would you be in theirs, if they killed the others?" I opened my mouth to tell her I would never forgive a murderer. But I stopped when my father crossed my mind. Had he felt remorse, I would forgive him. Had he understood, had he stopped, I would put it all behind. I didn't mind the fear, the threats, as long as there was love. Carlos, Carlotta, Caroline. I was surrounded by killers. I loved them all, equally, unconditionally. And something told me that something among those lines would go for my captors. I turned to look at Carol with  desperation , she only smiled like she already knew. "I thought so." She said and I started crying again.

{...}

I sat farther back at the Bus while Carlotta was straggling to unlock the second door, after easily opening the first one. I wasn't sure what she was using, or how long it had been. I was very sure it was pretty long though. I sat next to Carlos who held one of my hands tight, and I tried to calm down, without success. It was when I heard Carlotta let out a celebrating cry that I relaxed a bit, and full of relief I ran towards her, taking my place to the Driver's Seat.

Quietly and as quickly I could, I walked towards the store rooms that the girls were held in. Only to find one door open, and the other strangely bend. Had I paid more attention, I would had seen it bend more and more, something from inside pushing it, trying to escape. Instead I walked into the open room, the smell of blood hitting me in the face, more familiar than I'd like to admit. Peaking in I was horrified to see Marcia's dead, savaged body. 

Carol gasped by my side. "Oh Lord." She whispered, or maybe it was me, though I doubt it because I could barely breath, let alone utter out words. I hated it to admit it, but the sight was not as strange one would think. It upset me  nonetheless but the empty eyes filled with terror that stared at mine, brought me a sense of dezavu that took me back at another dead body, another pair of dead eyes, one I had looked into for hours and not mere minutes.

"We need to get out." Carlos shook my shoulder but I couldn't move my legs to move. Rooted in place I tried to form thoughts, and make out feelings from the chaos in me. "GO!" Someone screamed at me and unwillingly I took a step back. I was about to run away when a loud bang echoed on the corridor. More slowly than I'd like to move, I turned to look at the closed door, now on the floor, bend and torn off. 

"Is that-?" Carlotta tried to ask but her question was answered before she could complete it. With movements that nearly reminded me of  possession someone stepped out. It wasn't any alter I had met, yet I knew who he was, I had heard about him from the moment we stepped in here. Only now his name mad much more sense. 'The Beast' was trully living up to his title. He stepped out, his face and hands covered in blood, eyes fixing on me. The moment he realized my presence a sardonic smile craved on his face.

Then a shiver shook him and he cried out in pain. When he looked at me, Patricia had taken over. I wasn't sure whether I was relieved or scared of her at that point. I couldn't tell between the familiarity of the person, and that of blood. I couldn't tell if it was the fear that relieved me, the knowledge I hadn't forgotten how to feel that feeling that had become my very foundation. 

She smiled down at me almost pitifully and I couldn't tell whether I felt as weak as she saw me to be or even weaker. «Little bird can not stay in her cage, can she?» She took one step closer and I found myself unable to move as she cupped my face, blood staining my face, mixing with my tears. «Now, my dear.» She whispered,  wiping away the tears  affectionately. «He shall judge you. And decide your fate.» I shut my eyes keeping her out, trying to find a solution, a way to stop time, until I finally know what I want, and how to just get it. 

"Coral you need to get out  _now_ ." Carol whispered breathless but I didn't mind her. I was well aware I needed to get out but Patricia's tight grasp on my wrist and run away. But at the moment if I could do one, I couldn't do the other.

"There is no time." Carlotta argued for me and for the first time in my life, I saw fear in her eyes. Paralyzing terror in her broken voice as she cried. "Running will only make it harder."

«Do not fret. Do not run or hide. He is fair. He shall spare you.» Patricia promised, releasing me. Taking two steps back I watched her as she gave control to someone else. Most of alter switches I had seen seemed strange, some shivers and chocking. But this one, it seemed painful, thousand times more scary, more wrong, like something much bigger than the host, strangled to come out, crawling out of the skin that simple wouldn't fit it. 

A wolf in a sheep's  disguise.


	13. Chapter 13

**Coraline**

I didn’t move.

I didn’t breath.

He was terrifying to say the least. He was breathing deep and growled when he exhaled. His eyes too black, his pupils widening, a sardonic smile his face. He was huge. I used to think Dennis was the one who looked big, straight back and wide shoulders. But compared to him, he was normal. I already felt tiny before Dennis or Patricia, in front of the Beast, I could actually consider myself an ant. I can not describe this aura of darkness around him. This feeling of danger in the air. I was like a cornered wounded animal. He was either gonna kill me and devour me, or leave me to die on my own. Whether I was a toy or a meal, I didn't know yet.

I didn’t have tears to cry now  but I felt a press on my neck, a scream forming inside me, breaking in small whimpers in my attempt to keep silent . Never tearing my eyes from his I moved backwards, trying to form a plan of escape and failing. I glanced back at my Passengers. Carlos held his sister in a tight embrace. Carol had dug her nails to her shoulders, hugging herself. I was being stupid, or maybe I was being brave. Maybe for once in my life I had the courage to protect those who protected me for years. I  whispered  them  an apology , not sure for which part but yet regret filling me. With  that  being said, I blocked them out, praying I could be strong enough for them just this once,  because non of them needed to die again.

I didn’t believe Patricia. I knew she meant good, but I didn't believe her. 'Don't fret' she said, yet I was terrified of the Beast before me. He had bend a door, was she to say my neck was not next? 'Don't run or hide' she said. As if my leg would take me far. 'He shall spare you.' She said but I didn’t think I would make it out alive. Not just because Patricia had liked me. But at least I would have the dignity to be myself when I died. I would protect someone for once. Like mum did.

«What happened to you, child?» he asked and his voice brought me goosebumps. I can't  describe how it matched his looks, his dark aura and the unnatural mix of things I couldn't really put my finger on. It was a mix of a hiss, a growl and a human voice, unearthly and strangely deep, it shook me to my very core.  Bloody t eeth bared not  necessarily threatening but yet scary like the rest of him.

He got closer like a predator, nothing hesitant or weak about the way he moved. His eyes were on my shoulder, sparkling at the sight of my burned skin as if it was made of gold. I didn’t answer. I had forgotten the sleeveless dress and the exposed mark, I wasn’t concerned anymore about anything or anyone but the  monstrous alter before me. What need did he serve. What purpose, what fear was he here to kill. Was he Kevin's needs and thoughts? Or was it Patricia and Dennis that created him? Was that even possible? And if so, why? I wanted so bad to understand but I couldn't think straight. My only certain power was to understand people and yet blinded by fear I seemed to straggle with that too.

«Have you suffered, child?» He questioned and I opened my mouth to deny but the most irrational thought stopped me. What if he could tell when I am lying? I had suffered, I couldn't deny it. But it barely mattered now. It had shaped me. What  t he y had done had changed me and whether it had turned me to someone better or someone worse, I didn't know yet. So I shut my mouth and look away. If he was an animal, what better than lower my head and act like a prey. But then again, he was no Rocky, he spoke like a human, I just wasn’t sure how much humanity he had, considering he had just killed someone. Not getting an answer, he changed his demand. «Kneel.» He told me, my eyes widening and flying to his.

This word was enough for me to find my lost voice. «What?»

«Kneel before the Broken .» He repeated and I stood there as if I had been hit by lightning. _Kneel girl, open your pretty mouth._ Something broke in me. I had heard that before. _You like that, don't you?_ Was this to be repeated? I didn’t want it to. I didn’t want to do this ever again. I looked to the Beast, a conflict raising in me. If I refused I’d end up like Marcia and the others. If I refused, I’d die. Then again, death seemed much better than that. So full of  fear I raised my head and kept it high.  Better dead than this. If he did this, I’d wish I had died anyway.

«No.» Was my stern answer and at his loud exhale of anger, I stepped back alarmed. I couldn’t get the image out of my head.  They played like a broken record again and again, clearer than I remembered them. The terror of those memories repeating themselves. I’d rather die than hurt like that. And if it was death he would give if I refused. Then death I’d choose. «I have suffered too, so why don’t you kneel?» I challenged. Not much of a challenge if you consider how weak I sounded, and how the tears run down my face.  I needed to provoke him. Make him angry enough to kill me in blind rage. I need to deserve my death. He wouldn't hurt people who had been hurt, or so Patricia had implied. I had nothing to lose but my life and some dignity. I hadn’t decided which I valued most yet.

'It all started because I knelt.' I thought sometimes. I knew it wasn't completely true. My father's friend was the first one to sexually harass me but my father had chosen to continue to. Yet I couldn't help but think at that moment; Even if there was a slight chance that the Beast didn't care about that, why would I ever kneel before a man again. I didn't trust him. I didn’t worship him. Patricia did. I didn't have to do anything, I'd take the  consequences any day. «Set your example. Either kill us or let us go.» I hadn't realized at the moment but I spoke for myself and my Passengers both. I had blocked them but I wasn't alone. They were there, in the back of my mind. And the fact, the Bus hadn't lifted the block itself for someone else to take over, proved that my words were not suicide talk. It was completely rational, logical and honest.

He laughed.

_ He laughed. _

«REJOICE...» He howled as he fell on his knees, a wide smile across his face. I only froze. He looked at me, his face only a bit lower than mine even though he was kneeling. «You are Strong! You have suffered and You Are Now Pure!» He cried out in happiness and kept mumbling «Rejoice! Rejoice!» I covered my mouth to stop the sob that was about to escape. He was still terrifying, still a Beast, a cannibal. But seeing him on his knees, threatening and predatory but admitting a small weakness, filled me with both relief and terror.

He had actually knelt.  My wish of death and my beg for anger had backfired and the all mighty Beast was kneeling before me.  No stupid pride of a leader, he knelt before those who he represented and protected, equal but stronger.  I wanted to vomit. He wasn’t just here to take, he was offering too.  He was expressing respect to my stupidity and I felt more terror than ever knowing the purity of his intentions. An action that almost proved I could place trust in him. There was no pride in him, it was his followers that were proud of him. And I could see why. He knelt before me, proved himself equal. No ego or superiority complexes. One thing, that even though he had killed, made him better than most men. Call me stupid, but that moment I believed. That moment I saw the figure of power Patricia had adored and I understood.

So bitter and afraid I took the risk and knelt. I attempted to place trust on a killer.  Deep down I already regretted it. In the back of my mind, he had pushed me to the floor, and ripped the dress off me. He was hitting my head on the floor and he was breaking my hands and my good leg. In my mind I was torn apart once more and there was no one in this basement to help me. 

At first I was on my knees, just lower than before. I was tiny again before him but  that was not what bothered me . I took the risk, to prove myself that he wasn't arrogant like all leaders and men in power. I had to acknowledge him that. I had to show him I respected that. I fell low, then sank even lower, sitting on my legs, placing my hands on the floor in front of me, and then touching my head to the floor. Truly bowing to whatever power he held. I was no fool. I dreaded the possibility I was wrong and cried in fear while doing it.  My teardrops falling on the dusty floor and leaving small circles.

He placed a hand on my head, his fingers  entwining with my hair, I  flinched expecting him to pull me up and speak words that would tell me my worthlessness. Yet he laughed and cried with what I thought to be happiness. He praised me as pure at heart, strong, evolved, kind, brave, worthy. And I cried and I didn't know why.

His hand cupped my face and lift it, for me to look at him. He still repeated for me to rejoice, he still laughed and celebrated and I still was petrified. But now something had settled. I trembled and he laughed. But he didn’t mean harm.

He rose. I was still on my knees, crying but somehow being in peace. Or maybe being empty,  drained and scared to my bones of making a tiny movement . As he turned to leave I spoke again, perhaps foolishly but I did anyway.

«Wait.» I mumbled weakly. He paused and looked at me, even that was scary. Looking at me with curiosity was still unnatural with him. I pulled off the talisman, my neck feeling strangely light. I stretched my hand out. «Tell Hedwig it will protect him. Tell him I said goodbye.» I asked and he took the small coral branch in his large palm. It felt bitter to give it up. My mother’s last gift, my only protection. A part of me. But I was no longer a child in any way and it had failed to protect me. Hedwig would forever be one, and now, he’d need all protection he could get. From others and himself too.

He took off running, quick like an animal. And I cried until I was numb. Alone with ghosts and dead bodies.

{...}

I started moving after what felt like centuries. I hadn’t unblocked my Passengers yet, I would, but only after I was out. I wanted to be alone for a bit. Unfortunately on my way out I came face to face with more horrors than planned. First came the  realization that Casey’s cell was empty, without blood or body. My heart beat wildly, my mind spinning. Had she run out? Did she make it? She must had. She had escaped before my encounter with the Beast or I’d had seen her leave. She had the time too. But she also had a hungry beast on her tail and that made her chances even less than normal.

I limped through the rooms, looking for the e pale girl with dark hair. Instead I found a dead elderly woman with an awfully familiar face. I ignored her. I recognized her but I passed by her. I don’t know why, I just walked away, feeling cold and numb. ‘Not now’ I told myself ‘I need to get out.’ Funny how my priorities worked out. The corridor that led out was strangely dark. But then again, no monsters could come out of them now. The only monster here was me. And I had to face me when I got out. 

I had almost reached the exit. I saw light far ahead and windows. When I was almost there, at the doorstep that connects the room with the cage and the corridors, I saw her. She was alive. She was trembling in fear. She hadn’t seen me. It was stupid of me to scream her name like that with happiness and relief but honestly it was pure instinct. 

I didn’t mean to upset her. 

And I am sure she didn’t mean to shoot me.


	14. Chapter 14

**Coraline**

In any normal situation I would have opened my eyes and be in the Bus. Sure, it would have shut down, like when I hit my head, but I would be THERE. But for the first time since I could remember, I woke up in the Farm. I was lying in my bed twisting around,my blanket on the floor. Naturally I shot up confused. Something was wrong. Something didn't add up. I couldn't have been carried here, because even unconscious, the Bus retained the block. My mind couldn't work details of what had happened to me. I knew I was missing something. Something important.

I got up in a hurry, I could already hear my Passengers argue in the living room and I hurried there. In my dizzy state I thought the corridor to be longer and the time to get to the living room more than usual. I walk in to see them all standing up, arguing, looking upset. Like me, we all wore sleep clothes. Almost like we had spent the night here. Even though it was never night here. First one to notice me is Caroline. "There you are!" She exclaimed and immediately all heads turned on me. Carlos seemed somehow relieved, while Carlotta looked like she was gonna roast me. Caroline was neutral, watched me and waited a response. 

“How did we get here?” I questioned, my voice rough from sleep. So taking the cue I walked up to the couch and made myself comfortable. They wanted me to explain and I wanted explanations. It probably would take some time. "What happened?" Carlos questioned automatically sitting down next to me. I pulled down my nightgown, covering my legs to protect them from the cold breeze of the Mindscape. An instant regret filling, Marcia’s movement and results popping in my mind. His question was an excellent one. I paused, trying to find the right answer.

"You fucking blocked us!" Carlotta jumped in before I could remember and decide what to say. "How did you even get us here?!" She exclaimed looking around in what seemed to me like slight panic. Caught in her last sentence I frowned confused.

"You didn't bring me here?" I asked and everyone answered at the same moment, similar tones mixing in a single voice.

"No!" They raised their voice then realizing how loud they were paused and looked at each other awkwardly. I couldn't make much sense of anything at the moment. We had all gotten here, but non of us had walked here. For a quick moment a list of thrillers were the house came alive crossed my mind but I dismissed them. The Mindscape was created for us to live in, we were still in it, we were still technically alive. We just all had a big memory gap. Yet somehow I was certain this had happened to me before.

"What happened Coral?" Caroline asked, taking her usual seat at the armchair. She looked so professional sitting there, hands resting on her lap, soft facade but piercing eyes. She looked so formal like that. Almost like she had distanced herself, like she hadn't known me for years. She was encouraging me to talk, to be calm, but to be honest I just felt like she interrogating me.

Seated and calmer, I attempted to make sense of the mess of thoughts in my mind. First thing that popped into my mind was his voice. Not the Beast. I couldn't remember him there yet. I remembered my dad. In a twisted manner, Beast and father had switched places, both breathing heavy and asking me to kneel. That's where the paths crossed, and my answer was the one that separated them. Then paths crossed again as I knelt and surrendered. "He let me go..." I breathed. Slowly bringing on the surface little important events and moments. "He...didn't hurt me… Just scared me a lot." Carlos sighed with relief, hand on my shoulder pressing with comfort.. It was stupid of me to scream her name like that with happiness and relief but honestly it was pure instinct. The words fled my mouth. " She ...shoot me." 

Carlos' hand fell of my shoulder. "Come again?" Turning to see his panicked expression I felt myself panic too.

"I think I scared her. I didn't realize she had a weapon." I hurried to explain myself yet no one cared of how it happened. I turned to Carlotta, looking for some apathy to keep me calm but she had gone pale and looked scared. She looked scared back at the Bus when the Beast walked out too. To be fair, she had been scared many times while we were held captives. For a dead girl, she seemed to tremble at the idea of dying.

"Coral do you even realize what that might mean?" Carol exclaimed at the brink of hysterics. 

First thing that popped into my head was; ' She can not be charged with murder if it was defensive, can she? .' But then again. This couldn't possibly be true.  I was not dead.  I felt fine, the Farm was in place, and the only thing that worried me was the Bus' possible destruction. "I am not dead." I shook my head in denial. No way. I couldn't be. The Mindscape was intact, we were all here. This could ony mean my brain was active. This couldn't be death. Death couldn't possibly be that peaceful. And if it was, I was okay with the situation. An eternity in the Farm with my Passengers seemed like a fine paradise.

"How do you know?!" Carlotta nearly yelled at me frightened. Carlos now seemed to be more concerned about his sister that me, immediately leaving my side to hug her tight and comfort her. The sight warmed my heart, it offered me a couple of serenity to put my thoughts in place. I knew Carlotta had a soft side for her brother, and Carlos a tougher side to protect his Twin. But even though they were with me for nearly a decade, I had seen them act like siblings very rarely. 

"We are here. We are fine. We just have to go down to the road. Take the Bus, see how much damage was done." I comforted them, voice soft and steady. I needed to be the certain and strong one now. I needed to stay calm because clearly the Twins wouldn't. How funny. It seemed I was the only one leading nowadays.

"We did." Carol said and I turned to look at her dark expression and tired eyes. "There is no Bus. The road is empty. The memories  have gone rogue "

{…}

Entering the memories was physically painful. It stressed me beyond imagination and attempting to calm them down was exhausting. I found myself crying tears I had already shed and looking up to the Beast weaker and more fragile than the flower Patricia had placed in my hair. I felt the numbness when I saw Dr Fletcher's body. I hadn’t told the Passengers about her. I didn’t want them to know. I don’t know why but I just didn’t.

Then I saw Casey. I took my time in this one. It felt endless. The feeling of relief and happiness that washed over me was magnificent. Like a spark of light among dark thoughts. I was so full of joy. Not even the gunshot took that away. It was her terror after she realised what she had done that shook away the happiness. I hadn’t realised it yet but something was wrong. I released a breath, and the pain kicked in. Right on my stomach. Looking down I watched the white dress stain and drip with blood. It was flowing out of me like a river. Nothing to stop it.

Had I been through this before? It felt familiar.

I wasn’t afraid. Not at all. Blood dripped on the floor. I was still standing, watching the dress change colour. Pure white disappearing under the scarlet sea. The dress was ruined. I hated the red colour of it.

_ Why was this so familiar? _

I collapsed. I think I heard Casey scream my name. She sounded in more pain than I. She looked lost and she cried, I watched her as she pushed the iron door and tried with all her might to get out and reach me. Silently I mused.

If the Beast was here, he would had taken down that door with ease. Dad would hit me for being so stupid and getting shot. Patricia would be collected, she’d try to stop the blood, she’d fail. Mom would be panicked but try to keep it secret, she’d curse at Casey as she’d press the wound to stop the blood. Dennis would scold me for staining the dress. Hedwig would cry in fear. I would just lay down and frown. I’d just die in arms of people I loved. And so I did.

The memory threw me out on the road. It could no longer deal with my presence. It was the last one I had and it had chilled me to the bone, sent shivers down my spine. Half of the memory had been a hallucination bu one thing was clear. I had lost lots of blood. Now I doubted my certainty, I doubted I was still alive. I couldn’t shake away the familiarity of the pain, the  color of the blood, the feeling of being drained.

I started crying. I hated this feeling. I hated knowing something bad had happened but not being able to remember what. I had hated being afraid but not knowing why. I felt like I was crazy. Being in pain without apparent reason. I had been through this phase before therapy sessions. Lost. I knew Dad had done something bad. I felt bad. I just didn’t understand. I didn’t know. I hated the truth even more. Reality was unbearable. And once again, I was trapped in between. I felt awful. I couldn’t make out why.

I hadn’t noticed Carlotta stand on one side of the road. But clearly I was impossible to miss because she approached me and sat on the red soil like. She didn’t talk, didn’t hug me, comfort me. She only sat and waited for me to stop. That’s just how she comforted others. She stood and waited for me to stand by her side. Never offering a hand but never leaving my side. She had been my inspiration to start Driving more often. She had been the one to tell me how to fight for myself. And now she had become the voice in my mind, telling me to get my shit together. 

It took me a while but eventually I stopped sobbing and I wiped away the tears. Tired I glanced Carlotta. She was resting her elbows on her knees, nostalgically looking into nowhere. “I hate it when things appear and disappear in here.” She growled nodding with her head towards the endless road. Looking up, much to my pleasant surprise. I saw the Bus on one side of the road. 

“What?” I breathed confused. It was longer, bright clean and new. I immediately made the bold assumption I was alive, but quickly was disappointed when I realized there was a possibility it didn't work. I shot up and run towards it. The doors open, waiting for me. Carlotta didn't even run to reach me, with a few big steps she was with me. Examining impressed the Bus I cracked a smile at the new designs and seats. Everything looked more comfortable.

"Do you want to go call the others?" I suggested as I caressed the leather sleeve on the Wheel. I couldn't even make an assumption as for why we had a new Bus. At this point I wondered if I had lost my mind because I certainly hadn't made that happen. Carlotta sat in the most front seat and crossed her legs, leaning back and sighing with satisfaction.

"No need." She smirked. "Let's test how fast this new baby goes."

{...}

First thing I noticed  was the smell. No blood, no moisture, no dust. Just bleach  and sterilizer . Then came the sounds. A TV, a steady beeping noise, and people talking. Opening my eyes I knew were I was, and I was so thrilled to be reassured I was sound that I jumped up in agony. My injured leg forgotten, later I  realized it had been healed, not caring of whatever was tied in my body, my sore muscles or the light jolts of pain in my stomach. I bolted to the door, opening it wide, looking for anyone, just anyone, to prove everything was alright. It wasn’t joy I felt, just desperation. It was like I was freed from the safety of a cage. I was free but in danger. How  codependent of me. First I bumped to a nurse. I didn’t know her. She didn’t know me. I hugged her tight anyway not even knowing the reason why. At first she froze confused then awkwardly returned the hug. 

«It's alright. You are in the hospital. No need to worry.» She reassured petting my head like a child. Her touch was nothing like Patricia’s. It lacked the sweet cruelty that made it so comforting. Noticing the stiff bitter feeling of the lack familiarity, I moved away. «I'll let your guardian know you are awake. But I need to call the doctor to check on you, ok?» She asked and bit my lip nodding. I moved back into the room and shut the door behind me in light grief. Something was missing again. 

I sat down to my bed and no much later Sofia and a doctor walked in the room. I swear I hadn’t seen so much emotion in Sofia’s eyes as long as I had known her. Her hand took mine, tightening around it like her life was depending on it. The doctor, not moved by the reunion, proceeded to connect me back to all the machinery around me and after that to examine me typically. Sofia hadn’t said a word. And I was glad. «What do you remember?» He asked and the question had me laughing. Only I didn't, because my mental health was already I question and I didn't want to risk it.

«Casey shot me. Claire and Marcia were eaten alive...» I trailed off bitter. I didn’t allow the memories to surface, I merely stated them as facts, keeping away all feelings and ghosts. «Does that cover you  or should I tell you about the other body, and my lovely kidnappers ?» I asked and a Good lord, I sounded like Carlotta. She looked strangely proud of herself. Even Sofia turned to me confused. 

«Sass is always a good sign.» The doctor mussed noting something his papers, a small amused grin on his face. The examination went on for about half an hour. One question after another, everything among my balance to if I could  synchronize my hands and legs. I didn’t ask questions, simply obeying his requests and answering his. 

«How long have I been out?» I questioned when we were left alone. Sofia had kept silent the entire time, but her eyes were burning me. She had questions and so did I.

«A month and a few days .» She responded softly, reaching for my hand again. I pulled away. I didn't even know why. When she tried again, I let her. Her hand squizeeing mine with comfort. It did comfort me, but it also made my mind wander to a pair of bigger, stronger hands.

«Casey?» I asked. It covered a variety of questions. Was she out? Was she well? Was she unharmed? And everything around her life and well being.

« She visits every two days.» Sofia answered smiling softly. «She sent her uncle to prison. Apparently the bastard was abusing her.»

«You took the case, didn't you?» I teased and she smiled at her as she smiled and flipped her wrist. Of course she had. She had made her entire career about defending abuse she looked for the clients, not the clients for her. She had defended me in court, I didn't know, I never stepped in there. She was the one to represent me. And after my first foster family decided that they couldn't handle my D.I.D. she was the first to take me in. It was supposed to be permanent until someone else was found, but four years had passed before we could realise it.

«Of course I did!» She chuckled then bit her lip her expression darkening. «Did he hurt you?» She questioned as if she was afraid of the answer. Her voice so hesitant and low, I barely heard her.

«No.» I answered quickly. A bit too quickly. Almost as if I couldn't fandom it, even though every moment I had spent I wondered if they would. It then dawned at me. It wasn't like I was not aware of the fact but then, in solitude and away from them, it really dawned on me. They hadn't hurt me. Not Dennis, not Patricia, not even the Beast. They had threatened to, and they were for sure able to, but they had respected by many aspects while holding me captive. I didn't want to admit it, but they had showed me compassion while keeping me a prisoner, compared to my father who had abandoned me for hours, not caring if I'd run away or die of hunger and still abusing me anyway when returning.

«He escaped. But the police are looking for him. If he comes to get you again-»

«He won't. That's the point of releasing us.» I interrupted without a trace of doubt. He doesn't hurt the Broken. He wouldn't hurt me. He had the chance. He let me go. I was safe. Everybody else was not. Sofia had paused, watching me deep in thought. Before frowning and commenting.

«You look strong. Braver than I remember you to be.» I couldn't help but chuckle at her remark or the dark tone she had used to express it. As lawyer she had seen all kind of things, she knew to read people. And looking through my eyes she could obviously tell something had changed. Only I couldn't tell. I believed her, but I didn't feel different. The new feeling that rooted in me, were still too unimportant to notice. It's now that I look back that I realize they were there all along.

«I owe that to them.» I told her. I didn't know exactly what she was seeing, but whatever it was I owed it to them, to whatever I had been experienced, to the straggle and the fear. They were the only ones that could had changed me like that. I knew that. Sofia though, couldn't possibly understand it. She opened her mouth to protest but I stopped her again. «He killed. I know he did. Marcia and Claire didn't deserve such fate.» I wasn't mad yet. Or at least I hoped I wasn't. I understood the sin. Understood the mistake. I just needed to the devil's advocate. Someone had to be. «But I am not going to lie. They all helped me find pieces of myself.» I paused and then confessed. « I hope he stops the killings. But I don't want him found. It will do more harm than good.»

«He is one man. Against millions of people seeking justice.» And that's precisely the problem. This angry mob against him. And I was still unsure whose side was more right.

«He is no man.» I laughed shaking my head. In truth, I had no proof of that. Yes he had eaten two girls, yes he had taken down a door. But there was no actual proof of his unlimited power. At least not that I had witnessed. So why was I so certain of his superiority I didn't know. In the end, maybe she was right, maybe he was just one man. But at the moment I only saw him as much more. And still I wasn't scared. Not for me. Only for everybody else. Sofia's face changed in a caring one. One of pity and love. She took my hand in hers and squeezed with reassurance.

«He can't hurt you.» She told me and I returned the pity. Of course he could. He- They were free, they were dangerous, they were smart and ruthless. If he desired me dead I was a quite easy target and I didn't quite care I was one. Probably because I knew that Patricia, Dennis or Hedwig wouldn't hurt me, and now the Beast had spared me. He had the chance to not just kill, to break me and torture me, and instead, in only a mention of my pain, he had knelt and comforted me in a way I never knew I needed. 

«He can. He just won't.» I smiled at our hands a spark of confidence and certainty in me. I was safe. Perhaps safer than I had been for a while, with an angry Beast on the streets, avenging victims like me. How cruel of me it was to think like that. How wrong to hope he would indeed kill to save others. But maybe, just maybe, he'd do better job that others. Then again, maybe I was too desperate for a  savior and vengeance if I saw good in murder. What a conflict. To want to fall in to your dark side but still try and be sensible, fair and morally right. 

«Does he know?» Sofia questioned frowning. 

«About my disorder? Yes he does. So do the rest of him.» I  wasn't sure how much was told by Casey but I guess the police knew that the Beast spared hurt people, so they probably knew by my file everything about why he would had let me go. The irony of it didn't go unnoticed to me. I had my dad and his mistakes to thank for being alive and well right now.

«You are not the same.» She attempted to reassure me, to take some guilt she assumed I had, over my shoulders. I only paused to think about it. To list all the reasons she was wrong and all the reasons she was right. Weren't we? Other than the abuse, the crave of caring, the D.I.D.... Didn't we both crave of something clean and domestic? Spiritually and physically, we wanted safety. Of course unlike him, I wasn't willing to kill. But I was willing to turn a blind eye on it if it worked. They didn't understand it. We had been through similar experiences, we wanted similar things. Our roots were common. 

«We had much more in common than you think.» I told her softly. Her hand flew away from mine, her eyes widened as if I had burned her when the next sentence was spoken. «And that is not necessarily a bad thing.» Yes, I had said the unspeakable. I was openly defending him. I knew Sofia of all people would have some understanding. She'd dislike it, but she'd accept it. She'd listen to the arguments even though it sounded crazy. But we were a long way from that yet. 

«Don't tell me grew font of him.» She chuckled humorlessly. «Empathy is a powerful thing Coral but affections towards him are unwise.» She scolded me hands crossing on her chest. When I didn't answer she shook her head.«Just be careful.» She sighed, rubbing her temples before changing the subject drastically. «Your father's trust was opened.» Now that got me forgetting everything else.

«He had a trust?» I wasn't surprised to hear of his death. Prisons were known to be dangerous places. And apparently, pedophiles were top targets even from other prisoners inside prisons. No matter how low he lied, they'd target him eventually. But writing a trust meant he actually expected his death. And I knew now it was awful to expect to die. 

«He had cancer. Made sure to live it all in you name as long as you reached the 19th year of age.» Cancer? How curious. Of all things he could die of. It had to be his health. I was taken by the fact he had even bothered to make a trust to ensure my legacy of him. And it actually made me smile, because it only confirmed that my dad was not the monster they thought him to be.

«Is there a funeral?» 

«There was. 16 years ago.» She laughed at me but I only tilted my head confused. Did she meant to say days? I mean, it was okay, it was normal. He had a family other than me to take care of those things. Noticing my confusion Sofia's humor and smile faded as her lips formed a soundless 'o'. She stared at me for a few moments then exclaimed. «Oh shit.» She said then immediately shut her mouth closed. Swearing was not exactly common with her. It was almost funny «Now that is a major reveal moment to add on your drama book.» She mumbled under her breath, so quietly I hardly heard the sarcastic tone. She pulled her chair closer and leaned closer to me as she  emphasized and cut her phrases. «Your father.»

«Yes?» 

«Evaggelos Clacher.»

«No?» 

«He died when you were three.»

«No.» I simply did, shaking my head. Wrong in two out of three was she. I had my mom's surname, Clacher even though my dad had been a Smith. I had always found it facinating how all  children had their dad's name but I had my mom's. In elementary school, it made me feel special. Someone had probably mixed the trusts because my dad for sure hadn't die when I was three. If he had, my life would had changed dramatically. 

«Yes, honey. The bastard in prison is your stepdad.» She revealed and I wasn't sure whether I believed her or not. This couldn't be right. For a moment I expected for her to drop the joke but slowly I came to realize she wasn't making fun of me. Then it actually sunk in, a bit more bitter than it should had been. «I was positive you knew.» She whispered guiltily and I pierced my lips together and shook my head. Why was this so hurtful to know? It hardly changed anything. 

Carlotta behind me was swearing quietly. Clearly as affected by it as I. «I had no idea.» I admitted biting my lips bothered. 

«He left you a house outside of Phily. A farm and a barn to be exact. And a small amount of money.» She listed, no joy in her voice. Only a trace of guilt coloring it.

«The farm?» I repeated my attention carried away from everything else. The farm was his? And now mine? The joy, the taste of freedom and happiness I felt at that moment, could only compare to the feeling I had as I climbed up those stairs on the Zoo, my freedom a few steps away. «I'll give you the key when we get home.»

«I can go to the farm?!» I exclaimed, warmth filling me from within and my heartbeat getting faster. This was a dream coming true. My long lost home, my hidden solitude. And now it was mine, and it was within my reach. I didn't even remember how to get there anymore but apparently someone else did, and they'd tell me. Sofia's eyes shot to the HRM that had raised widely and she raised her voice at me. Scolding me but unable to hide her laughter from my joy. 

«Coraline calm down. Of course you can. You own it.» She laughed.

{...}

After Sofia had left I moved and sat by the window. Looking at the blue sky and feeling the sunshine on my face I came to actually  realize I hadn’t believed I’d get out of that basement again. I had prepared myself for pain, death, guilt, fear but nothing could prepare me for the joy I felt when I relaxed when the warmth hit my skin. Nothing could prepare me for the serenity and the nostalgia. For a split moment I thought how nice it would be to have Patricia relaxing with me, Asian Music playing in the background. She’d like that. Then guiltily I thought of Sofia’s brother and how he had lost a daughter at the hands of a Beast. Before whom I had knelt and surrendered a piece of me. Indirectly agreeing with him and his actions. Believing in him.

Carlotta pulled me off the seat. I had zoned out, nearly getting us out of the road. She told me to sit back, that she had this, so I did. I lied down on the last seats, admiring how soft the new material was. Then I sank back to my thoughts, time passing without me realising. Until, of course, Carlotta suddenly stopped the Bus cursing loudly and I fell off. “What the fuck is a motherfucking kid doing here?!” She yelled opening the doors and storming out. Disoriented I jumped up and run behind her, meeting her at the door as she dragged a blond boy inside. “A whole fucking Bus and you pisspot had to jump right in front of it!” She threw him at me and closed the doors. The child was terrified, he was crying and clinging on me while I looked down at him confused and shocked.

‘The heck?’ I thought. Was he an alter? When had he appeared? Why had he appeared? Was the Beast so traumatic that I created a new alter? I stared down at the boy and wondered of his purpose and age. He should be around 10, perhaps 12 if stretched. His purpose here I couldn’t fandom but he for certain had one. 

“Hey kiddo. It’s alright.” I smiled down at the child who was lying in my arms, reassuring him. He looked up to me alerted. “I am Coraline. Who might you be?” I asked pushing away a few strands of his hair. He was extremely thin, brown eyes, blond hair and over sized clothes, no shoes, just socks. He frowned at me. Hesitating to answer. Either not remembering or not wanting to tell me. I chose to believe the latest. “You don’t want to tell me your name?” I questioned and he shook his head shortly. I risked a glance at Carlotta who had raised an eyebrow. Whoever he was he knew to never trust anyone. Not even with his name. Which kind of made me wonder his reasons. “How about Coran?” I suggested the first name that popped in my head. Immediately I thought about the choice again. This ‘C‘ pattern among the names of my passengers was turning weird, almost like a ritual of welcoming among us. 

Still he nodded, agreeing with his new name. I licked my lips and cleared my throat trying to find a proper way to begin this long explanation. Instead all I said was; “What happened?” Concerned like always, which was good and smooth but also not what I actually planned to say. He wiped away some tears and breathed in to calm himself. 

“I think I was kidnapped.” He whispered, his head turning from Carlotta to me and to the window. I nearly choked even though I only breathed in. ‘Kidnapped. Right. Great.’ I thought in slight panic. How could you explain to a kid that he hadn’t been kidnapped, that he wasn't even in a world were kidnapping was an option, but he was merely an alter in the head of a mentally sick girl. And he’d have to stay with his kidnapper, that were actually quite friendly. Now why did that sound familiar? 

“W-Why?” My voice was high pitched with panic. I hadn’t properly breathed in before asking and I sounded like a strangling kitten. Carlotta, not giving a damn like usual, was chuckling amused at my anxiety and the situation. How like her, to make fun of me at non life threatening situations. I didn't see her laughing when we were in his place. 

“I woke up in a house but my mom was not there. And I didn’t know the house. Or the people there.” 

“And why do you think they kidnapped you?”

“The man was talking about sacrificing children to a Beast.” My eyes widened as my head snapped at the woman that was leaning against the controls more amused than ever. Seeking for some help, even though I knew she wouldn’t offer any. I understood why the main thing Carlos and Carol would tank about would be the Beast. I also understood Coran's quick reaction to run away. I mean, I had done almost the same. But not quite. Oh who am I kidding?

“Carlotta?” I turned to her, a sentence away from crying. ‘Help me here!’ I wanted to say. ‘I don’t want the new alter running around thinking I will kill him! We are supposed to be a team!’ My fear only made her laugh harder. Coran frowning at her stance on his situation while I resisted the urge to facepalm. How sensitive of her. Laughing at him would certainly calm him down.

“I am sorry this is too funny.” She apologized between her laughs, fighting to breath. At least she recognized that the time was not ideal. I couldn’t even find it in me to recognize the irony. I was just worried and anxious of how I’d help the kid adjust to the new environment. I was supposed to be good with kids but this one had come out of nowhere and required explanations and reassurance that was nearly impossible to give him without scaring him even more. 

“Funny?! How do I explain everything here?!” She didn't mind my raised voice or my pressing tone, she simply raised a hand to hush me and to tell me to wait. Then she turned to the boy and I knew she was up to no good. I don't have the slightest idea why I didn't stop her. That was the one thing that any logical person who knew Carlotta would do. I don't know why I didn't.

“Hey kiddo, what do you remember last?” She asked smirking amused. The kid frowned and I frowned too. Were was this heading? He sank in his thoughts before looking up more scared and even more worried. I paled not knowing why 'Oh shit' was all I could think. His face gloomed and frowned in a moment of shock and terror.

“Am I dead?” He whispered in the brink of tears.

“Sort of.” Carlotta admitted, shrugging and smirking at him STILL chuckling. 

“Carlotta!!!” I exclaimed, blood flushing on my cheeks. I wasn’t looking to make it worse but there we were. 

“He’ll be fine.” She dismissed me laughing while I panicked even more. Poor Coran had gone pale from shock and looked down on the floor like he saw his life pass in front of his eyes.

“How about we go back to the Farm, Coran?” I suggested massaging his shoulders to calm him down. Christ he was just skin and bone. “The people there are actually very nice.” And here I was, thinking I couldn’t scare him more. He started shaking go his head violently like a damn stuck mechanism, never uttering a word but somehow yelling at me not to. "Alright alright! How about I show you a trick?" I offered and hesitantly he gave the go ahead. I proceeded to explain him the functions of the Bus, how when we drove, we controlled my body in real life, and taking advantage of the whole 'possessed girl, ghost in Mindscape' tale my mom had once planted on us, I told him he had a second chance to enjoy life with me and the Passengers.

I turned on the Bus, he sat behind me, watching the Road as we drove again.


End file.
